Geordie Version of Windows

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MICROSOFT ANNOUNCEMENT

It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Geordie version of Windows 2000 may have accidentally been shipped outside of Newcastle.

If you have one of the Newcastle editions you may need some help understanding the commands.

The Newcastle edition may be recognised by looking at the loading screen. It reads "Windaz 2000" with a background picture of a Brown Ale bottle superimposed on a photograph of the Tyne Bridge. It is shipped with the Brown Ale screen saver

Also note:

The Recycle Bin is labelled 'shite'

Dialup Networking is called 'me mates'

Control Panel is known as 'how te fook aboot wi the settins'

The Hard Drive is referred to as 'Big disk'

Other Features:

OK = alreet

cancel = fook that

yes = aye

no = nee fookin' chance

find = gan gerit ya fooking sel'

goto = owa there

stop = divvent move

start = hadaway and shite

settings = settins

programs = stuff that daes stuff

personal folder = mah shite

Also note that Windaz 2000 does not recognise capital letters or punctuation marks

Some programs that are exclusive to Windaz 2000:

tiperiter = a word processor

cullarin book = a graphics package

addin masheen = calculator

tunes = CD player

dole = accounting software

toon = a spreadsheet of Newcastle United FC's recent scores

bevvy = local off-licences by postcode and price of Brown Ale

porn = Microsoft Internet Explorer

-- Anonymous, July 03, 2000


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