Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg...

Post the rhymes you can remember. I'm especially interested in the ones that went along with jumping rope and rhythmic hand games.

-- Anonymous, June 25, 2000

Answers

The only non-obscene ones I can remember are in Polish.

-- Anonymous, June 25, 2000

Tell us the obscene ones, then. And how old you were, and if you understood what they meant.

-- Anonymous, June 25, 2000

LouLou had a steamboat. The steamboat had a bell. LouLou went to heaven. The steamboat went to hell-o operator. Give me number 9. If you disconnect me, I'll kick you from behind the 'frigerator there was a piece of glass. LouLou slipped upon it and cut her little - ask me no more questions. Tell me no more lies. That's what LouLou told me before she went and died.

The key is to run it all together while singing it. Man, that was a racy little song when I was in second grade.

-- Anonymous, June 25, 2000

The obscene ones were obscene in that they were racist. I didn't know what they meant, but after my Mom explained to me why they were so awful, I did wonder why so many nice people were chanting them on the playground.

-- Anonymous, June 25, 2000

Karen, there's more: "ask me no more questions/ I'll tell you no more lies/ the boys are in the bathroom/ zipping down their flies are in the country/ bees are in the park/ Lulu [or Miss Mary, as we sang it] and her boyfriend are kissing in the dark."

Then there's the jump rope rhyme: "Cinderella/ dressed in yellow/ went upstairs to kiss her fella/ made a mistake/ kissed a snake/ how many doctors did it take?" then you keep jumping and count until you mess up.

Also I halfway remember one of those hand clapping rhymes that was something like "eeny-meeny pepsi deeny oooh bop bop a-lini education elaboration I love you! Down by the rollercoaster shamrock shamrock caught you with your boyfriend naughty naughty..." it repeats with another verse but I can't remember anymore. :(

-- Anonymous, June 25, 2000

Jill, I love that there's more! Thank you! OK, I'm a little embarrassed to be so excited about it, but it's quite a thrilling discovery for me.

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

Does anyone remember the full chorus to the "Diahrrea" song? Something like: When you're sliding into home, and your pants are full of foam, diahrrea...diahrrea.

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

When your sliding into first, and you're feeling something burst Diahrrea, Diahrreah. When your sliding into third, and you lay a big fat turd, Diahrreah, Diahrreah.

At least that is what I remember of the song from watching "Parenthood" on t.v. last week.

And who can't forget the Sweathogs - Up your nose with a rubber hose! Up your butt with a coconut!

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

Hah, that lame Daphne & Celeste song (Ooh, Stick You) uses that 'Up your nose with a rubber hose' one. My little brother and I modified it to 'Up your butt with a rubber nut' -- we really had no idea what we were saying, but we knew that 'nut' rhymed with 'butt'.

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

ooh, ooh, ooh! I have a whole BOOK on this! It's called "Children's Folklore" and it has all the Little Johnny jokes,Helen Keller jokes, jumping jack rhymes, escaped convict in the woods stories, etc. I'll consult it when I go home for lunch...

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

Yay, Gardanna! Paul reminded me of this one the other day. It's a witty rejoinder for when someone says "So?" So, so?
Suck your toe
All the way to Mexico
I'll be first
You'll be last
I'll be there to kick your ass.

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

I remember some clapping songs.

Miss Mary Mack [Mack, Mack] All dressed in black [black, black] With silver buttons [buttons, buttons] All down her back [back, back] She asked her mother [mother, mother] For fifty cents [cents, cents] To see the elephant [elephant, elephant] Jump the fence [fence, fence] He jump so high [high, high] He touched the sky [sky, sky] And he didn't come back [back, back] Till the fourth of July [ly, ly] Miss Mary Mack

Another less irritating one is:

In this land afar Where the ladies smoke cigars Every puff they take It's enough to kill a snake When the snake is dead They put roses in its head When the roses fade It's the end of sixty-eight

I have no idea what the last line means.

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

You people are totally jogging my memory! I remember Miss Marry Mack. There was one that we did with hand motions that was basically nonsense:

Bo-bo-skee-otten-oteen
Nay-nay-nay-nay-boom-boom-boom
Bo-bo-skee-otten-oteen
Bo-bo-skee-otten-oteen
Bo-bo-skee-otten-oteen-BOOM!

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

here's one...

Say Say my Playmate come out and play with me and bring your dollies three, climb up my apple tree, slide down my rainbow, into my cellar door and we'll be jolly friends forever more.

No, no, my playmate, I cannot play with you my dollies have the flu, boo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo, I have not rainbow ain't got no cellar door, but we'll be jolly friends forever more.

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

Milk, milk
Lemonade
Turn the corner
Fudge is made
Stick your finger
Up the hole
And out comes
A Tootsie Roll

And for the Diarrhea rhymes, when I would visit friends in Boston, it was all about Ruptures (ejaculation):

When you're floating in space,
And your balls hit your face
It's a Rupture! (Insert Boston accent so it says: Ruptchah!)

When you're walkin' down the hall
And your balls hit the wall
It's a Rupture!

And the Ennie-Beenie Hand Thing went like this where I grew up:
Eennie-Beenie Bopsadeenie
You are wop-sa-deenie
Education, liberation
I love you
Tutti-Frutti
Down down baby, down by the rollercoaster
Sweet sweet baby, I won't let you fall on over
Shamrock, shamrock, shammy-shammy-shamrock
Caught you with your boyfriend
Naughty, naughty
Give me a piece of candy
Greedy, Greedy
Don't do the dishes
Lazy, lazy
Jump out the window
Crazy, crazy

That's all I can think of for now

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

Miss Mary? Lulu? It was always Miss Susie when I was little. Oh, and by the way:

"When you're driving in your Chevy and you feel something heavy, diarrhea! Diarrhea!"

I am amazed at how many little rhymes I forget..."Hey girls! Hey what? Hey girls! Hey what?" If you ever had a chant that started like this, let me know.

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

what you say is what you are/ you're a naked movie star!

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

and what's the rest of this one: "apples on sticks just make me sick/ make my tummy go 2-4-6..."? Anyone remember?

Brilliant idea for a thread, Gwen sweetie. I gotta get that folklore book, Gardanna!

-- Anonymous, June 26, 2000

Hey, I'll post some more in a bit, but for those interested in the book, it's by Simon J. Bronner, published by August House. You can get it used for under $10, I think. This is a link to the August House site w/ the book description. It really rocks.

http://www.augusthouse.com/0-87483-068-0.htm

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Older kids used to taunt younger ones by saying: Kindergarten baby, wash your face in gravy!

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

We had a pat-a-cake hand-slapping rhyme that went like:

The space of two lips together Twilight in heaven Sending my love to you What is the Me-hee-HEE-nig, boom, boom! Of flow-ers grow-oh-HO-ing, boom, boom! The space of hot-cha cha cha one, Hot-cha-cha-cha two, Hot-cha-cha-cha three, One two three four, cha cha cha!!!

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

When someone tells you to shut up, you should retort:

Shut don't go up
Prices do
Take my advice
And shut up, too.

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

A corollary to Maggie's post:

Baby, baby
Stick your head in gravy
Wrap it up in bubble gum
And send it to the Navy

I always wondered why you would send it to the Navy.

And we did the "Say say" one mentioned earlier, but we had a second verse that I'm not sure if we invented or picked up somewhere:

Say, say, my enemy, come out and fight with me
And bring your weapons three, climb up my thorny tree
Slide down my poison pole, into my dungeon door
And we'll be jolly enemies, and we'll have fun, 4, 3, 2, 1

"Poison pole"?

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Maggie, we would say "Baby, baby, stick your head in gravy, wrap it up in bubble gum and send it to the Navy!"

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Doh! Nicole, jinx, buy me a Coke!

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Kim -- we said "slide down my razor blade, into some alcohol."

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man I live in a frying pan I like to go swimmin' with bowlegged women And swim between their legs

I think there's probably more to that, but I can't remember it.

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Counting rhymes: besides eenie meenie miney moe, we had one potato two potato.

Counted by thwapping "potatoes" (closed fists" on top of other people's, usually in a circle. You get two potatoes, of course, to start with. "One potato, two potato, three potato, four. Five potato, six potato, seven potato, OR." (That person's potato is out, you start again. Fairness of this selection method relied on the counter not being able to parse multiples of eight rapidly.)

I knewmore "camp songs" and "bus songs" than counting or jump rope rhymes probably because I wasn't an athletic child. "Sippin' cider through a straw" is one I vaguely recall.

"I can sing a rainbow" is a fairly standard childhood song, apparently, but itsn't a kiddie rhyme per se.

"I see London, I see France, I see (name here)'s underpants."

Playground game: "Red Rover, Red Rover, send (name here) right over."

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Comet, it makes your teeth turn green! Comet, it tastes like vasoline! Comet, it makes you vomit! So get some Comet, and vomit, today!

Tra La La Boom-Dee-Ay Our teacher died today! She died of tooth decay We threw her in the bay and when we pulled her out she smelled like sauerkraut (more here?)

Birdie Birdie in the Sky Please don't do it in my eye I'm a big boy, I don't cry I'm just happy pigs don't fly

For jumping rope, there was: Bubble gum, bubble gum in a dish how many pieces do you wish? (and you shouted how many pieces and that was how many jumps you had or something like that...I seem to remember they sped the rope up, so if you said "20!" everyone chanted "1-2-3-4..." and rope got faster and faster and it was all about how many "pieces" you could handle)

Then there was one that went like this: Laura says: "Gwen!" (Gwen jumps in) Everyone sings: "Gwen stole the cookies from the cookie jar!" Gwen: "Not me!" Everyone: "Yes, you!" Gwen: "Couldn't be!" Everyone: "Then Who?" Gwen: "(shouts next person's name) stole the cookies from the cookie jar" and that person has to jump in to take Gwen's place, get it? I'm sure this had more to, and probably rules like you couldn't call someone's name who had just jumped, but it was tricky to jump and think of a name to call out at same time. We probably had penalties for skipping a jump and stuff.

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

"I'm Popeye the sailor man/ I live in a garbage can/ I eat all the worms/ and pick out the germs/ I'm Popeye the sailor man!"

In grade school I heard a lot of this: "Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun/ Jill forgot to take her pill and now they have a son." Once in 2nd grade, in the middle of class a guy whispered that across the room to me. I guess I wasn't in the mood, because I got up, walked over to his desk and kicked him in the shin. He cried but I didn't even get in trouble. Our teacher, Miss Helwig, just rolled her eyes and told him "let it out."

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Ooh I just remembered a really naughty one. Y'all are going to think I was an exceptionally violent and obscene child now, but oh well...

"Motherfuckin' titty suckin' 2 balled bitch/ Momma's in the kitchen cookin' red hot dicks/ Papa's in jail raising some hell/ and sister's outside singing pussy for sale"

Isn't that awful? I have to go wash my mouth out with soap now.

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

Jill! We did that one in 2nd grade! But it went: motherfucker, motherfucker, 2-timing bitch, every time I look at you my balls itch. Mama's in the kitchen cookin' that rice, Daddy's in the backyard shootin' that dice, brother's in jail raisin' hell while sister's outside selling fruit cocktail. (When you sang "fruit! cock! tail!" you pointed to your non-existent breasts, then your crotch, then your butt. I guess we were androgynous back then.)

Also, I'm almost certain the the Jack and Jill thing was in a song. (One of those precursor-to-rap songs.)

Some of y'all will remember me writing about my fave Popeye one. I'm Popeye the sailor man, I live in a garbage can, I turned on the gas and burned up my ass, I'm Popeye the sailor man. HA!

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000

My cousin used to do one of those sing-songy "you're out" rhymes like the one-potato thing. My brother and I got a total bang out of it, and still do -- 20 years later.

Oooka mooka mocka chocka, ding dang doe. Oooka mooka mocka chocka, in, out you go!

And then there was the obnoxious song taught by my fifth-grade teacher. Everyone sits in a circle and does a lap slap, hand clap, left snap, right snap to the rhythm as they sing. I can't remember the point -- was it to eliminate people from the circle or something to just pass the time until the bell rang? She was a psycho teacher, so who knows.

Flea. (Flea.) Flea fly. (Flea fly.) Flea fly flo. (Flea fly flo.) Vista! (Vista!) Koomalada koomalada koomalada vista. (repeat) No, no, no, not la vista! (repeat) BEEP! Billy oten doten, bo-bo, ba deeten dotten. Ssshhhh....

-- Anonymous, June 28, 2000

You're right: "Jack and Jill" is from a song (I think it is "I Don't Believe You Wanna Get Up and Dance (Oops!)" - The Gap Band), and it's on _Funky Stuff: The Best of Funk Essentials_, from Rhino Records.

This might ring a bell: "I said, oops! up! side! your head, I said oops, upside your head."

That's sheer poetry. ;)

-- Anonymous, June 28, 2000

The Popeye song I remember has the line:

I loves to go swimmin' with barenaked women

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

"I love you, you love me, homosexuality, people say we're just good friends but really we are lesbains!" You sing it to the tune of the Barney "I love you" song, but oddly we were singing this a decade before the advent of Barney.

-- Anonymous, July 12, 2000

That's coz y'all were actually using the tune of "This Old Man". And isn't there another song with the same melody?

One by one
We had some fun
In my bedroom
Uh-huh, and all through the night
Two by two
We [something rhyming with "two"]
In my bedroom
Uh-huh, and all through the night
Three by three
He undressed me
In my bedroom
Uh-huh, and all through the night

And it went on in that vein. Four, lay on the floor, five, it was live, six, something about dick, seven, felt like heaven, eight, blah blah great, nine, he was fine, ten, did it again.

My friend Dot and I recording ourselves chanting that when we were 12 years old. Her mom found the tape and labelled it "Filthy Words".

-- Anonymous, July 12, 2000

Uh-huh, Gwen! Now I'm gonna be cracking up at your filthy words all through the night!

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2000

My dinner was just delivered (Chinese food) and it mademe remember a horrible, racist rhyme from childhood: "Me Chinese, me play joke, me put peepee in your coke"

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

Today at the grocery store I saw a little girl who was spinning and laughing and chanting the eenie-meenie pespi deenie song. She was having so much fun all by herself that it made me giggle, too. And it was neat to know that little girls still know the same songs I knew when I was young.

-- Anonymous, August 31, 2000

The one I can remember best is not from childhood, but from a scary summer working as a Girl Scout camp counselor. It's the Princess Pat chant. Anyone? Be careful, it sticks in your head. You repeat every line, line by line:

The Princess Pat Lived in a tree She sailed across The seven seas She sailed across The ocean too And took with her A rickabamboo

A rickabamboo Now what is that It's something made By the Princess Pat It's red and gold And purple too That's why it's called A rickabamboo

There were complicated hand motions but I can't remember them.

Repeat until your counselor strangles you, or runs off in the woods and shrieks maniacally.

-- Anonymous, August 31, 2000