Top Ten Signs You're at a Bad McDonald's

10. Your "Quarter Pounder" has a long, thin tail.

9. The kid serving you has grill marks on his forehead.

8. Sign out front reads, "No shirt, no shoes, no reason you can't get a job here."

7. Their Mayor McCheese was caught in a hotel room smoking crack.

6. Blocking drive-thru is the bloated body of Wendy's founder Dave Thomas.

5. Manager takes a bite out of every burger to make sure it's okay.

4. In his photo, employee of the month is holding a mug shot number.

3. You spill vanilla shake and it burns a hole right through your pants.

2. A guy dressed as Ronald McDonald keeps asking to touch your food.

1. Their slogan: "Did somebody say 'E Coli'?"

-- Lars (lars@indy.net), June 23, 2000

Answers

Lars, I have to fucking stand up about your post. What service to mankind, did your post serve a purpose? What fucking Country do you reside? And to what is your purpose? Remember, Fonts were created, by Man Kind.

-- My Story (andI@sticking.toit.com), June 23, 2000.

I thought #10 was pretty funny.

-- FactFinder (FactFinder@bzn.com), June 23, 2000.

If you're to believe what cpr said at Poole's new place this could be his pre 4th fireworks crescendo. Let's see. Agree FF.

-- Carlos (riffraff@cybertime.net), June 24, 2000.

I liked #9, myself. :)

-- Stephen (smpoole7@bellsouth.net), June 24, 2000.

A guy dressed as Ronald McDonald keeps trying to touch your........ : )

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), June 24, 2000.

"My Story"--

"What fucking country do you reside"? I reside in Phucking, a suburb of Philadelphia.

I am sorry that you are stuck to your story--have you tried Fels Naptha?

My heart goes out to you for your speech impiddlement. Maybe you and al-d could start a support group.

-- Lars (lars@indy.net), June 24, 2000.