Dr. Science solves a great mystery. Doomers still don't understand the importance of his work.

PROBABLY THE OIL CLOGGING THEIR "BRAINS".

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Dear Doctor Science,

What is a wazoo and how much do you have to have before something starts coming out of it?

-- Paul Baumberger from Chattanooge, TN

Everyone has a wazoo, but they come in all different sizes and appear in different locations on the body. You can easily find your wazoo by standing naked under short wave ultraviolet radiation and watching yourself in a polarized mirror. Your wazoo will appear as a grapefruit-sized appendage somewhere below the waist and above the knees, unless you're Finnish or Hungarian, in which case it will be pumpkin shaped, appearing at top of the head. Wazoo watching is a fun way to spend an evening and I often take the time to look at my wazoo, or someone else's, after a hard day at the lab.

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I think I may have found a cure for the common cold. If everyone is the world sneezed on each other, wouldn't we all catch each other's colds? Am I crazy to think this? -- Chris Herz from Eugene, OR

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Subscription questions - send a blank message to faq@drscience.com. Visit the Ask Dr. Science web site at sponsored by those smart folks at eGroups For info about advertising with Dr. Science, send a blank message to advertise@drscience.com. All Dr. Science material Copyright 2000 Duck's

Breath Mystery Theatre. All rights reserved.

-- cpr (buytexas@swbell.net), June 15, 2000

Answers

SNAP! Guess it was just a matter of time.

-- Carlos (riffraff@cybertime.net), June 15, 2000.

Great post!

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), June 16, 2000.

Maria, Grazie. Now a bit of humor for Carlos and the others that is on the level that they can understand since clearly they do not comprehend the enormous significance for Dr. Science's research into The Wazoo. One should note that The Oracle included a picture of "Carlos" gazing into a world that he can seldom understand as was evidenced for over a year here and on other boards.

Let us see if he can "GI" it (doubtful).

Subject: [JOKE] Cruel Professor From: Steve Willoughby Date: Thu, 15 Jun 2000 06:52:34 -0400 X-Message-Number: 1

<--------------------------->

An autopsy professor was giving an introductory lecture to a class of students. Standing over a corpse, he addressed the class. "There are two things you need to make a career in medical forensics. First, you must have no fear." Having said that, he shoved his finger up the corpse's anus and licked it. "Now you must do the same," he told the class.

After a couple of minutes of uneasy silence, the class did as instructed.

"Second," the professor continued, "you must have an acute sense of observation. For instance, how many of you noticed that I put my middle finger up this man's anus, but licked my index finger?"

Submitted by: Ken Karger @ worldspy.net

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-- cpr (buytexas@swbell.net), June 16, 2000.