[This is a song so the scanning might seem weird.]

THE VICAR AND THE FROG

(Stan Crowther)

There once was a very, very holy vicar Went a-walking along the street one day.

When he heard a little voice say "Excuse me, vicar. Help me, vicar." the voice did say. And the vicar looked 'round, but all he could see

Was a tiny little frog sitting on the ground. "My dear little froggy, did you speak to me?

Was it you that spoke when I heard that sound?"

"Oh yes," said the froggy, "Oh help me, vicar.

I'm really not a frog, you see.

I'm a choir-boy, really, but a wicked fairy

Cast a nasty spell on me.

And the only way that I can be saved

From this evil spell," the little frog said,

"Is for someone to take me and put me in a place

Where a holy man has laid his head."

So the vicar took him home, and put him on his pillow; There he laid till the break of day, And the very next morning, a blessed miracle,

The spell was broken, I'm glad to say.

And there was the choir-boy in bed with the vicar,

And I hope you think this all makes sense. For there, my lords and members of the jury,

Rests the case for the defense.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), June 12, 2000

Answers

:)

-- helen (rotflm@o.git), June 12, 2000.

Now, THAT is good! And at least as believable as some of the things we year in court.

-- Hamilton Felix (skagity2k@hotmail.com), June 12, 2000.

But most of us don't have a full year on jury duty......

-- Robert A. Cook, PE (Marietta, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), June 13, 2000.

But, Robert, they've been borrowing years for years, at least since Roman times. Remember Julius Caesar? "Friends, Romans, countrymen--lend me your years." Just borrow one or two from someone.

-- Old Git (ann@spamproblems.com), June 13, 2000.

Yes, year right. I left borrowing out...with interest in year's truly.

-- Robert A. Cook, PE (Marietta, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), June 13, 2000.

Three men are discussing their previous night's lovemaking.

The Italian says, "My wife, I rubbed her all over with fine olive oil, then we make wonderful love. She screamed for five minutes."

The Frenchman says, "I smooth sweet butter on my wife's body, then we made passionate love. She screamed for half an hour

The Jew says, "I covered my wife's body with schmaltz. We made love and she screamed for six hours."

The others say, "Six hours? How did you make her scream for six hours?"

He shrugs. "I wiped my hands on the drapes."

-- kritter (kritter@adelphia.net), June 14, 2000.

[Snort], Kritter!

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), June 15, 2000.