Did you know anyone in you elementary, middle, or high school who was an absolute ass? No, seriously. Did anyone actually call you fat or stupid or faggot or idiot?

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2000

Answers

Yes. And there were others who I referred to by those names as well.

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2000

I just got called a nerd a lot, but my husband got his lock glued shut three times in one semester. They had to be cut open, and he had to buy new ones.

-- Anonymous, May 15, 2000

A bunch of jerks in my elementary school hated me for unknown reasons. Probably because I was such a goody-goody. And this has continued into middle school. I try not to let it bother me. Some people can be so immature.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

There were these guys in high school who were always giving me a hard time whenever I walked by. They were in the school band and figured that gave them the right to behave like the Stones during their 1974 US tour. They had beaten me up several times, until they found out that I played the drums, and pretty good at that. They were in desperate need of a drummer, since their latest sticksman had left school. Just try to imagine how great it felt when I could tell them 'no'.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

I think I've blocked out most of the horrible things people said to me growing up, but here's one that does stick out. My very first "boyfriend," in sixth grade, broke up with me in a huff one day. He walked out of the band hall in front of a lot of people and said, "And you might be pretty if you didn't have so many zits"! Man, that's still embarrassing to recount. But hey, if that's the worst he could do...oh well. He really just made himself look like an ass, not me.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Oh, and this one girl in third grade wouldn't let me in her Brownie troop because my mother was divorced and we lived in an apartment. That's pretty hateful, and it did hurt my feelings a lot.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

In the 8th grade, there was this big, mean chick who somehow (none of us could ever figure out how, unless she was giving up the booty) had landed the "it guy" that year as her boyfriend. I mean, this girl was STOUT, and nobody messed with her. She used to hang out in the hallway with her hottie boyfriend, making out and staring down any female who dared to walk by. One day she hollered out something to me as I passed. I didn't catch what she said, but could tell by her evil laugh that she was making fun of me. I was embarassed, so I must have subconsciously sped up my pace. From then on, I would practically speed-walk past them, until she came up beside me and mimicked me, racing along, over-exaggerating her arm swings, calling me a chicken-shit retard. She told people to tell me in class that she would be waiting outside afterward to beat me up, which made me want to piss myself, but she never did anything about all the threats. Stuff like that went on for months. She even called me one night and asked me to go to the movies with her. I was confused and scared to death, so I told her I couldn't, and she said, "Smart, bitch, because I was gonna KICK YOUR ASS!" She eventually dropped out of school, and ended up working at Burger King full time. Funny thing was, she continued to terrify me, even from behind the counter wearing polyester.

The next year I had a class with the hottie boyfriend (they broke up when she left school). I asked him if he knew why she sought me out to make fun of, and he said it was because he had commented as I went by one day that he thought I was cute. That was all it took for that meanie to harass the shit out of me. Insecure much? I ended up going out with the guy a couple of times, although it escapes me why, because if he had been any sort of decent person, he would have stood up for me during his girlfriend's psycho sessions. Maybe he was scared of her too. In fact, I think he turned out to be a little crazy, because senior year (we barely even spoke anymore by then) he pulled me aside in the hall and said, "If my parents, or anyone else calls you and asks, we went to prom together, okay?" Uh, whatever dude. We certainly did not, and I had no idea what the hell he was talking about, but luckily no one ever asked me about it.

HAPPY ENDING ALERT!!!

11 years later I saw the mean girl at Blockbuster video. She was gigantic, barefoot, dirty, and had 4 filthy screaming kids hanging off of her, no wedding ring, and not enough cash to pay her late fees, so she had to put her movies back. Ha! She saw me too, and I could tell she recognized me, but she looked away quickly. I took the high road and decided not to say anything to her. I felt she had been sufficiently humiliated. Her life was punishment enough.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

They all did. I'm still very good friends with a handful of people I was at school with, and I hated the rest.

I sleep soundly in the knowledge that the majority of them are still living in Small Town, New Zealand, working at the local supermarket, married to some boring git they met at the age of 18.

Living well is truly the best revenge.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

People suck. In my 8th grade government class, they called me Doggie {insert my last name here}. I really couldn't have given less of a shit, because the people who started it were complete idiots (and had never been friends) but it still hurt on some level. One of the guys accused me of having a lesbian for a mom (she came out -- to us -- that year), like it was a bad bad thing, but the funny thing is that HE ended up being queer.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

For part of elementary school, I was one of a very few lower-middle-class students in a mostly upper-middle-class school district. So as a result, I was the 'cootie girl' of the third grade. Charming nickname, isn't it?

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

I was a big dork throughout most of my growing up years, but this incident stands out as the most amusing (in retrospect):

These prissy girls who sat behind me in choir figured out I was an atheist midway through seventh grade. For the rest of the year, whenever I would walk by one of them, they would hiss "Looossssssiiiferrrr" (Lucifer) in my direction.

Apparently their Christian sensibilities hadn't caught onto that whole "be nice to others" thing yet. Also, they failed to realize that a person who doesn't believe in god probably doesn't believe in the devil, either. Ha! Lucifer!

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

i just remembered in the 5th grade I was friends with this girl Traci, who was known for being cruel to kids who she considered below her level. She seemed to like me for some reason, and I felt it best to stay on her good side so her wrath wouldn't suddenly turn my way. The next summer was a bad one financially for my parents, and they couldn't afford to get me any new clothes. I started the next school year wearing all the same things I'd worn the year before (quite a faux-pas in that school), and Traci pounced on my vulnerability. She told me to my face she didn't want to be my friend anymore because she knew I was wearing last year's pants. She then told everyone else not to talk to me because I was poor. Some of them ignored me just to keep from getting her mad, then later apologized when her cruel attention had turned to some other kid. I realized that the year before I had probably ignored someone I liked just so Traci would like me. It's a bad feeling from both points of view.

In high school, she became famous for mooching off of people. She was always borrowing jewelry and clothes from people, and never returned anything. One day she begged to borrow my new sweater, and I took such great pleasure in telling her no way.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

there was this really bizarre family that lived down the street when i was in omaha, growing up. three kids: girl, girl, boy. all freaks.

the second girl one time used our bathroom and proceeded to throw her feces all over the place-

her little brother wrote "bad" words in crayon on our house. we knew it was him b/c the letters were 2 inches off the ground.

i wonder what they're up to now...

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Cyndi was a senior, I was a sophmore. I had classes with her sophomore boyfriend. We were good friends. At one point freshman year I had a crush on him, I made an "I love Robert" keychain. It meant nothing to me, I just hadn't bothered to take it off. She took my keys out of my purse one day and broke it. She hated me. She called me fat. She once wrote a letter and put it on my desk. She wrote "Attn: Hippo Hips, do every girl in America a favor and stay away from other peoples boyfriends" It said a lot of other really mean things that I obviously have blocked out. It was sick and sad. I ran out of class crying. Her boyfriend, my friend, tried to follow me. I was devastated. He was my friend before they even knew each other. But he still let her treat me like that. When they graduated a bunch of her friends left me really rude things in their Senior wills, like the Jenny Craig program, and a carton of slim fast. They called me slut, and I was so far from having sex with anyone it wasn't even funny. I was miserable about all this at the time, but now I look back and I think, how sad that they even took so much time out of their lives to worry about me, you know? Obviously I must have been a pretty big threat. And the fact that I was around fifteen pounds overweight was the one thing they could cling to to try to make me feel like shit.

And like Lisa E., I have run in to a lot of those girls since high school. I have to say that all those years of tanning did not do my friend Cyndi well. She always looked kind of like a bulldog. She still does. But now she looks like a well baked, leathery bulldog. And some of those girls who called me fat and made my life hell? Big as houses. Fuckers. All that bad ju ju came back around. Karma, baby. And me? Well I eventually lost the baby fat, and it must be said that I look and feel better than I ever have. Ever. What comes around goes around.

The good thing to come out of this, is that I had to learn at a very young age how people work. I learned that jealousy and envy are ugly, ugly things. And I learned to say kiss my ass.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

If I put down every humiliation I suffered when I was in school, I could fill a book. But 1987 was the worst.

When I was 11, I started grade seven with the rest of the kids in my class. I wasn't a well-liked kid by any stretch of the imagination, but for some reason the abuse I got was delivered 10-fold in high school (BTW: In Quebec, high school starts in grade 7. I think they do that to torture us).

1987 was a really bad year for me. My grandfather and my dog just died, I was hitting puberty (I got my period that year, too), and the adjustment to a new school was the last thing I needed. Plus the fact that my parents were really struggling that year. There was no money for new clothes, and I had to wear hand-me-downs. That was a real no- no in that school, which was full of rich kids. Oh, did I envy them!

For whatever reason, a girl named Joanne decided that I was a prime target. Joanne was at least two years older than everyone in our grade, because she'd failed twice. I was a year younger, because I got into kindergarten when I was 4. Joanne's whole family was cheating welfare, and they all lived in the same house. Joanne was spoiled beyond recognition, and loved gloating about it to me. When we hit grade 7, she hooked up with a bunch of similarly spoiled girls (Robben, Lianne and Jill), and they made it their mission to make my life miserable.

Joanne lived in the same building as I did, so the torture would start as soon as I got to the bus stop. She would sit behind me and smack my head, spit gum (and less pleasant stuff) in my hair, call me names, beat me up, and a host of other things. When I got to school, She'd get together with her little group. For the rest of the day, I would be followed, taunted, smacked around and harrassed. My locker was broken into more times than I could count. Gym class was torture, because not only were all of those girls in my class, but they shared a change room with me, too. I was afraid to change in front of them. Once we were in class, I'd have balls tossed at me, I was pushed off the balance beam, and I was whacked with badminton rackets.

Their dislike for me spread to pretty much all of my grade. People I didn't know hated me. A girl come up to me in the hall and said "If you ever wear those jeans to school again I'll kill you." Waiting at the bus stop after school, girls wouldn't stand next to me because I had lice (Yeah, when I was in grade 3-- but half our grade did, even Joanne) and they told me they could see it jumping off my head. I was told that I was no good, and I'd be living in a cardboard box when I grew up. I had three friends- Jenny, Janice and Monica. Joanne's group hated them, too.

The harrassment continued all that year. I became depressed. I started failing classes because I wouldn't do the work. I would find any excuse to miss classes (I didn't know about skipping yet-- I got parental permission by calling Mom from the office and telling her I didn't feel well. She went along with it because by this point I was failing everything and was having fits in the morning before school). The only classes I passed that year were Drama and Art. I was constantly in the guidance office. I cried a lot.

One day in drama, I finally gathered the guts to stand up to Joanne. She started calling me poor, and I said "Well at least my parents work, and I'm not a welfare brat like you!"

She punched me in the stomach. Hard.

The teached didn't see anything, and Joanne got away with it. She always did.

I failed the grade, and my parents switched me to a new school, where I was given a chance to start again. My father was especially angry with the situation, because he'd done everything to get the teachers and administration to get these kids off my ass.

I started grade seven over again, and it was a little tough at first. I was still picked on, but it was never as bad as it was that first time.

As for Joanne, I think she might have failed grade seven (bringing her total to three failed grades). I'm not sure of that. What I do know is that she went on Welfare like the rest of her white trash family. She slept around, and had two babies (A shame that such cute kids had to have a mother like that). The kids' father was a thug, and he was deported back to Jamaica.

One night my brother went to a strip club with his friend, and guess who he saw on stage? That's right! Joanne! And guess what? He says that she wasn't all that good, and she had stretch marks everywhere!

I felt a little vindicated when I heard that.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

I was a little overweight most of growing up, so I got a lot of taunts about that. The worst? "Fat, but flat."

The funniest? Elementary school. Girl named Sky was the class bully and for some reason it became my week to get beat up. She drove me nuts that week until like Thursday, when she announced she was beating me up after school. Well, I couldn't say no, right? What was I to do? Well, I left that day and ran as fast as I could home.

The next day, I got to school and rumors were all over that I'd been to scared to meet Sky after school for her to beat me up. (What kinda of sense is that? Of course I was scared!) Sky, who came from a rather poor family, demanded an excuse. My answer? "I'm sorry I couldn't meet you after school, but my mom picked me up to take me to the Foley's Red Apple Sale. Maybe another day." She never bothered me after that.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

when i was in elementary school there was this girl named amanda gonzales who used to call me names and make fun of me. i don't know why she hated me so much, but that chick had it in for me. i didn't see her for a few years but we ended up in the same journalism class (i think it was my junior year) and then i guess she had grown up. but then she got involved in this fundraiser for her club and she tried to sell me sweettarts one day and i was convinced she had poisoned them (paranoia, no?) so i wouldn't buy them.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Wow, I was never picked on by chicks after 7th grade. One snotty rich bitch named Carly (she was so vain ;) made my life a living hell that year, but she moved away and her abuse was then taken over by a guy named Mark.

Mark gave me shit through the rest of school, until I dropped out halfway through senior year because I couldn't deal with it anymore. He had most of his buddies get in on it too. All jokes were related to my weight.

I've only seen two guys out of the cast of thousands that picked on me. One was my boss's son, and he was actually quite civil to me. He looks about the same, so no just desserts there quite yet.

The other one I saw in the gym last week. He looked like he's done lots of steroids in the past few years. When I saw him my heart rate jumped from like 140 to 185, and I still wanted to kill the bastard.

But, since it's only been five years since I left high school, I'm gonna give it another five and see how everyone is doing at 27. I'm sure it won't be pretty.

- Ma

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Eigth grade. Girl named Maxine. Snarky rich kid whose claim to popularity was that she never wore the same pair of shoes twice. (And they were all hideous, by the way.)
She and all her friends weren't exactly antagonistic, just rude - until one day, we were doing some kind of group project in English class. They, naturally, were talking shit about someone they recently decided was a Good Person after all: "Blah blah, but then I saw her at the Gap and she has *really good taste*, blah blah blah..."
I jumped on the opportunity. "So good to hear you all have the Gap, I mean - how else would you know who your real friends are?"
My senior year in H.S. just ended, and all these girls still avoid me, but were ingratiatingly nice when they had to be.
Animate.

-- Anonymous, May 19, 2000

Hi I'm new to the forum, please be gentle with me! Back to the question. This girl bullied my best friend in high school and seeing as our other so-called friends didn't want to get involved I had to stick up for her and even now 4 years I want to kick that girl's ass. Does anybody else still feel anger towards the bullies?

-- Anonymous, May 20, 2000

Hell yes. In grade school, I was bubble butt. One of my pictures in the yearbook had the caption "Amber Tubley". Looking back, I wasn't even that big, but apparently some people thought so. In high school, I had my share of enemies too. But what sticks out the most is my coop teacher from my senior year. He told me that I would never go to college, I would never amount to anything in life. That hurt. Really, what kind of teacher says that to their student? Whatever. I did go to college, I do have a respectable job, and I am even working on my masters degree. Not bad for someone who almost didn't graduate from high school. I saw said teacher at a bar not too long ago. I wanted so badly to say something to him, and let him know where I was in life, but I didn't want him to realize I was actually quite wasted. Oh, well, who cares.

-- Anonymous, May 23, 2000

I've never heard anyone say that they were one of the popular kids in school and picked on other people... in fact, I've heard former popular kids claim that they were terrorized by classmates! I guess everyone gets picked on, to some degree. Or at least FEELS picked on.

I was lucky enough to be the Class Loser not only in elementary school, but also in junior high, because even though I transfered to another district to get away from the torment, *one girl* from elementary school ended up going there as well, and in her quest for popularity, informed everyone about what a loser I'd been in grade school. Thanks, Heather Hartford.

I was pantsed, tripped, shoved, slapped, spit at and had things stolen from me. My books were vandalized, my locker was vandalized, my clothes were vandalized. On good days, most people ignored me. On bad days, I was surrounded by bitchy junior high school girls who would torment me about what I wore, how I did my hair, what I read, what I said in class... anything that happened to strike their fancy. One day, they claimed I had lice. The next day, they made fun of me because I'd used a vinegar rinse on my hair... for weeks, they claimed I reeked of vinegar. They would laugh at me for wearing something like an off-the-shoulder sweatshirt or pegged jeans, but when one of the popular people wore it, it was sooo cute! I pointed that out, and got laughed at some more. I developed a very sarcastic attitude (hey, laugh or cry), but my snippy comebacks only encouraged them ... and they didn't "get it".... One day, One of the Cutest Boys (read: Assholes) in School said "Hey, Dwanollah, will you go with me?" And I, tongue in 13-year-old-cheek, breathed "Oh, thank God, what a miracle, yes, yes!" He, of course, went "No way!" and everyone laughed, not getting my sarcasm (or pretending not to get it), so that for days on end, all I heard was how Steve Thompson made SUCH a fool out of me.... One day after math class, Julie Tatch, the meanest, toughest girl in school, cornered me and smacked me in the face, hard. I'd never spoken to the girl before. "That's for making faces at me!" she said. It took me many minutes to figure out that my lazy left eye had been turning out during class, and I literally got a slap in the face for looking at this girl cross-eyed. The slap hurt, but what hurt worse was that everyone who saw it just stood there and laughed at me... no one said "are you okay?" or "what was that about?"... I deserved that slap, without question, by the very nature of existing. By 8th grade, there were days that I was too terrified to go to school because I couldn't endure another day of torment. So for high school, I transfered to a small, Christian school.

Flip side. Suddenly, I have friends. While we didn't have the same kind of "popular" cliques there, I was suddenly one of a group, liked by most, not hated (that I knew of) by anyone. And there was a girl in our class named Denise. Denise was a freshman, but was almost 18. Denise had scoliosis but refused to wear a brace, so she walked funny. Denise had greasy hair and bad acne. Denise was dumb as dirt. One of my friends started picking on Denise. And I, I'm ashamed to say, joined right in. I wasn't overt in that I didn't say mean things to her or initiate the cruelty, but I also was in no way nice to her, either. I had been the Class Butt for so long that I was heady with the fact that it wasn't me anymore, that there was someone else! Shame on stupid, insecure me. Luckily, Denise left school after 9th grade and married a Navy man (hey, San Diego), and there was never a real School Loser in the time I was there.... If there had been, I promised myself I'd never be so mean again... even if it meant I'd go back to being the class loser because of it.

-- Anonymous, May 23, 2000

Elementary school was okay - I got tormented more than my friends, but I dealt with it. Junior high - there's a different story.

Junior high sucked ASS. Admittedly, I was gawky, awkward, socially inept, and terribly insecure (read: very easy to pick on) but I was also smart, sarcastic, and pretty much assumed that everyone was stupider than I was. It was probably the only thing that saved me from a total breakdown. I had friends - I wavered being friends with the "popular" girls who were snarky behind my back and not being friends with them because I was sick of their deviousness. And my lord, do I remember names. Not to sound creepy, but occasionally I'll type a couple names into a search engine to see if I can find an email address for one of them, just to say "hi" and maybe get a chance to rub in the fact that I'm a hell of a lot more successful then they are. Not that I know that I am, I just pretend I am. I figure most kids my age are still in college, so there's a good chance I'm at least making more money than them. :)

-- Anonymous, May 23, 2000