With the approach of Easter, I've found myself trying to remember when I first discovered the fictitious nature of Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, and so forth. I honestly can't remember when or how I found out, and I was wondering how other people found out / handled this revelation. Were you traumatized? If you have kids, do you plan to tell them one day, or have them find out accidentally, or what? (On "The Rosie O'Donnell Show," Jamie Lee Curtis said that she thinks it's wrong to perpetuate these myths, and Rosie's head almost blew off, she was so upset, trying to say for the benefit of her young viewers, "BUT OF COURSE THERE IS A SANTA CLAUS! SHUT UP, JAMIE LEE!" Rosie bugs me sometimes, but I thought this was a nice gesture on her part, at least from a child's perspective.)

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2000

Answers

I believed in Santa and the Tooth Fairy et al for a very, very long time (and I still believe in the spirit of Santa). My mom was very careful to let me believe as long as I wanted, and as I was an imaginative child (and adult...I still check closets for Narnia) it went on for a long time. I don't remember what made me question their existence, but I remember taking a bath and having my mom come in. I think I was sick, and I think I was about 10 years old, and I just looked at her and said, "You're the Tooth Fairy, right?" and she looked a little surprised, and admitted she was. "And the Easter Bunny?" another nod. It went on from there.

I don't remember being upset about it, just accepting it all at face value.

I will try to keep my children believing as long as possible and protect their belief to the best of my ability to do so. And of course, I hope they never, never stop believing their whole lives-- not in the spirit behind these things, anyway. And I hope that they learn to open the closet doors with their breath held, just like I do.

Children should be believed.

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2000

I have no recollection of learning of the non-existence of any of those things. Apparently it wasn't too traumatic. Or else it happened in the three-year period of my childhood that is a complete blank to me -- so maybe it was pretty traumatic.

However, I just had to add what my mother thinks is one of the funniest things in the world. Apparently I stopped believing in Santa pretty early on, the Easter bunny shortly after that -- but I got all stubborn about the tooth fairy, and believed in her for something like three years after I stopped believing in the others.

I think maybe I was just after the money, though...

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2000

I don't remember it being particularly traumatic when I found out. In fact, I seem to remember feeling sort of special, like I was being let in on a secret that the "big kids" and the "grownups" shared.

I still remember the day it happened, though. I was around 7 or 8 and it was summer. We were visiting my grandparents in Brooklyn. My mom and grandmother were in the kitchen helping with dinner, my younger sister and brother were playing in the other room, my father, grandfather and uncle were in the living room watch the ballgame. I must have been pondering the issue for a while but since my sister and brother were younger than I was, I decided to wait and ask because I didn't want to ruin it for them. When the time was right, I marched into the kitchen and said, "So, there's no Santa Claus, is there?" My mother turned to me with this shocked little smile and said, "No, honey. It's me and your father." I just shrugged and said, "I guess I don't have to ask about the Easter Bunny," hugged her, and left the kitchen.

You know, I really enjoyed the years that I knew the secret and my siblings didn't. It was something I shared with my parents and it was nice helping them make something special for my brother and sister.

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2000

Someone emailed this to me this morning and I thought it was fitting for this topic. I have no idea when I made the connection...but I still believe in the spirit of christmas...

What the Easter Bunny Taught Me...

Don't put all of your eggs in one basket Walk softly and carry a big carrot Everyone needs a friend who is all ears There's no such thing as too much candy All work and no play can make you a basket case A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits Some body parts should be floppy Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans Good things come in small sugar-coated packages The grass is always greener in someone else's basket An Easter bonnet can tame even the wildest hare To show your true colors you have to come out of your shell The best things in life are still sweet and gooey -Author Unknown-

-- Anonymous, April 21, 2000

i'm a long time reader and feel kinda funny posting. but i felt like i wanted to contribute on this one. i was completely traumatized when i found out about santa. my family celebrates on christmas eve and after dinner, my dad and i (i'm an only child) would always drive around looking for santa and rudolph while mom stayed home and cleaned up or whatever her excuse that year was. or she would come with us, but conviently forget her purse and have to run up and get it. when we would spend christmas with my cousins, the uncles and grandpa took us out while the aunts and grandma stayed behind to clean up. (put out the presents) they went so far one year that they had a random family member dress up as santa to be there when we got back from sleigh hunting. how could a kid not believe in santa when he was sitting in your grandparents house when you are like 4? or when your other grandparents use their fur coat to touch you with when you are supposed to be sleeping so you think it's the easter bunny? how could i not believe?

i was 9 or 10 when i found out. my friends had started teasing me since i still believed in all that and i was determined to prove them wrong. christmas eve rolls around. so when we were leaving, in insisted that we all left at the same time. we got in the car and my mom forgot her purse. i said i was going back with her and my dad made me stay in the car. he then told me that i couldnt go with her because she had to put the presents out because santa wasnt real. i was truly shocked and appalled. i thought he was lying for sure. then he went on with this big speech about the spirit behind santa and blah blah blah and all i could think about was that my friends were right, my parents lied to me, and that i had to go eat crappy italian dinner with my liar parents. (i was 9, i hated italian food. so that was punishment in itself.) apparently the funniest thing that i said was "so, what are you going to tell me next? that there is no easter bunny or tooth fairy either?" i think i cried though most of dinner that night. and i certainly dont remember anything else about that christmas.

we all laugh about it now, because i was 9. that's pretty old to still believe blindly, especially when the other kids are telling you other things. well, and that i was dense and didnt get it that all of those were stories. but i always think about it on christmas eve and i still think it sucks that they told me on christmas eve. the should have told me in like october or something. but i dont know if i will encourage it with my kids as much as my family did. and i certainly wont tell them on the day of.

although i guess it didnt screw me up too much since i still look under bridges for trolls and stuff. (sometimes the closets for narnia too, melissa.)

-- Anonymous, April 21, 2000

The Easter Bunny used to write us these notes that came with our Easter baskets, and they'd always end with "Happy Easter!". For some reason when I was about 7 or 8 I started to get a little suspicious that there wasn't an Easter bunny, so I decided I'd do some detective work.

I came up to my mom and asked completely innocently for her to write "Happy Easter" on a piece of paper, thinking she'd never guess what for. Then I compared it to the note, and triumphantly showed it to my mom. I think she denied being the Easter Bunny, but next year, the notes were in a different handwriting, strangely enough like my grandfather's.

-Cathy

-- Anonymous, April 21, 2000

No Easter Bunny? You people are sick...

-- Anonymous, April 23, 2000

Psst--Rob?

There's no Great Pumpkin either.

-- Anonymous, April 23, 2000

I believed in Santa Claus until I was about 7 or 8. When you go to school and all of the kids there have older brothers and sisters who like to torture them, then you get to hear the real truth! I confronted my Mom about it and she told me that wasn't an easter bunny or a santa claus. I was really and truly upset about it. But then I played along...I wanted the toys and the candy and the money for teeth...it was fixed but I still/and still do love it! It's a wonderful thing for children!

-- Anonymous, April 24, 2000

It's kind of funny, because I have very distinct memories of believing in all of these things, particularly Santa. (I remember laying awake at Christmas Eve listening intently for the reindeer hooves.) But I can't for the life of me remember when I learned "the truth." I'm sure my brother spilled the beans, but it apparently wasn't too traumatic.

-- Anonymous, April 30, 2000

I was about seven, I think, when I found out the easter bunny didn't exist. the neighbor's grandaughter who was three grades above me. told me. I was in shock, completely amazed. I then went and questioned my mother about that and then drew my own conclusion about santa and the rest... although when I was about six I swore I saw the reindeer fly past the moon. and I almost caught my mother, 'the easter bunny' around that time as well. I didn't feel well and went down for medicine and she had already placed the baskets out, not imagining either my sister or I would have a reason to go down, let alone be up at such a late hour as ten. I was shocked and outraged as to how she could not have seen the easter bunny. she got out of it by telling me she must have fallen asleep. I did check the yard every year for footprints though. always disappointed.

-- Anonymous, March 01, 2001

My parents never told us that they were real. It's not that they were cruel and said "There is no Santa Claus". It's just that we always knew that they bought us presents, they filled the Easter Basket, etc. My dad used to make a joke out of the Tooth Fairy - he'd call the time recording and tell the 'Tooth Fairy' that we had a tooth out, and then they'd put a quarter under the pillow. But there was never any time when we didn't know that it was really them.

I think they did it to spare us the shock of learning that they weren't real. There've always been presents from Santa under the tree, but we knew who they came from.

I like this way better anyway. This way we learned about the spirit of the seasons, without having to deal with some childish bubbles being burst when we were older.

-- Anonymous, April 24, 2001

You people are so stupid! There is a tooth fairy an bunny and santa! I'm 11 and I still believe So there my mom is 43 and she believes My dad is so smart and He believes! HA Ha

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2001

I was the youngest of four kids, so I didn't stay innocent of these facts much longer than my oldest siblings - maybe until age 4 or 5. My parents didn't make a huge effort to keep up the pretense, either. I absolutely do not feel cheated by this. Instead, I am quite happy that I didn't grow up with deep delusions about imaginary participants in my reality.

No matter how long I think about it, I can't think of a single reason to be sad that I didn't long believe in Santa or the Easter Bunny, or one way my life is poorer for my having learned young not to believe in them. Adults find it cute that they can fool kids in this way. As a one-time kid, I prefer not to have been a dupe or fool of adults, for their dubious amusement.

Can anyone explain the "charm" of what I missed in a way that would convince me I lost out on something good?

-- Anonymous, September 02, 2001

i really believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the tooth fariy, and so on and so forth!Well come on i just wanted, let's look at a example: It's Easter Eve, and your exited to see if you saw the EASTER BUNNY! When you go down stairs you saw alittle (quick flash) of the easter bunny! You want this on film ,but HE/SHE/IT's gone :(

-- Anonymous, March 30, 2002

Ah what a tangled web my parent's wove! Santa Claus and The Easter Bunny my dedicated holiday friends. Oh how I pined for the Christmas morning and Easter, oh the Easter Bunny hiding goodies for me, to and fro. The truly wonderful spirits of the never never land, my senses were overcome by their power. Then one day at school, I found out that my holiday happiness bringers were false. My belief system had a stake driven into it's heart. There was only one thing to do, I had to ask the proper(ahem) authorities! I came home dejected, my realities, were they just mere myths? I came to the holiday "experts", they indeed informed me that Santa was not real. Oh how my very essence was crushed! Then I replied, choking on tears, "I guess there is no Easter Bunny either!" My parents laughed at me! To my utter amazement as I was drowning in sorrow, my parents were swimming in mirth! So my K.C. and The Sunshine Band tape wasn't from the Easter Bunny Ehhh! In retrospect I think this was a good thing, I thought the Easter Bunny had better taste than this! All in all, I would put my money on the Easter Bunny over Rosie O'Donnell. Think about it, which one do you think is more of a reality!

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2002

You guys are gay, o isn't it sad that you lost faith in the tooth fairy and santa claus , like give me a friggin break, it's just a part of growing up , something I think you should do.

-- Anonymous, March 06, 2003

Wow what an in depth perspective. Can't we all be friends??(LOL)

-- Anonymous, August 30, 2003