Come up with some limericks or leave the forum.

You have a choice.

-- richard (ohsirrichard@aol.com), March 24, 2000

Answers

Oh, come on, richard.

I've got something different planned for tomorrow.

(I hope you can take a ribbing? It'll all be in fun ;o)

~*~

-- Laura (Ladylogic@...), March 24, 2000.

There once was a guy named Rich

who began to act like a bitch

he harassed that poor Laura

against the laws of the Torah

until we finally got fed up and told him to cut it out already.

How'd I do?

-- (hmm@hmm.hmm), March 24, 2000.

oh so there you are

with hmm

the lone ranger and tonto

-- richard (ohsirrichard@aol.com), March 24, 2000.

Ya did great, hmm!

But, I think richard is just funnin' with me. Aren't ya, rich?

~*~

-- (Ladylogic@...), March 24, 2000.

oh you velvet tongued southern belle

well i shouldn't think any challenge of mine will make any difference anyhow

I'll give you 24 hours

to leave town or come up with the goods

-- richard (ohsirrichard@aol.com), March 24, 2000.

hmm, I give you only a 5 for technique, but an 11 for entertainment value (I'm still laughing), which averages out to an 8 (not bad).

My attempt at crafting a final line (while preserving your intent):

There once was a guy named Rich
who began to act like a bitch
he harassed that poor Laura
against the laws of the Torah
till his limericks made us all itch

-- David L (bumpkin@dnet.net), March 24, 2000.

Ok, I'm game...

There once was a guy named Rich
who began to act like a bitch
he harassed that poor Laura
against the laws of the Torah
'till his limericks made us all want to pitch.

(Does the meaning of "pitch" translate in other countries?)

There once was a guy named Rich
who began to act like a bitch
he harassed that poor Laura
against the laws of the Torah
now she is a cackling witch

(Thanks for taching me how to do single lines, David :o) ~*~

-- Laura (Ladylogic@...), March 24, 2000.

Oh, that was great. Now I have to learn where to put my flower.

How about behind my ear?

?~*~

-- (Ladylogic@...), March 24, 2000.

To pitch...to Ralph, throw-up, regurgitate, vomit, upchuck etc..etc..ect.

What rhymes with Dick.....click, flick, sick, lick, bic, wick, ... oh, I give up.

-- hick (not-now@rhymetime.ed), March 24, 2000.

There once was a serious forum,

Where deep thinkers posted decorum,

But then came a *****,

Which made them all *****,

And now it's against them or for 'em.

------------------

OK, rate that!

-- dinosaur (dinosaur@williams-net.com), March 24, 2000.

Let me give it a shot, dinosaur....

There once was a serious forum,

Where deep thinkers posted decorum,

But then came a polly,

Which made them all jolly,

And now it's against them or for 'em.

:o)

~*~

-- Laura (Ladylogic@...), March 24, 2000.

Now that's more like it! A good ol' fashion duel, with decorum.

I'll be the self-appointed referee (oh hey, too bad you didn't all appoint yourselves first, eh.)

Please follow the rules of the limmerick duel; the first two lines have 7 sylables, the next two have 5, and the fith line and last has 7. So each stanza goes 7-7-5-5-7. You may throw as many per post as you wish. Haikus are allowd too, but to compete with a limmerick it must have a special punch.

The winner gets to stay, and the loser must bow to the winner and promise never to flame the winner again.

May the best ...um...brain win.

-- Chris (!@#$@pond.com), March 24, 2000.

No!

Your stakes are too high......

I can't say goodbye....................

so don't even try.

(Haven't you noticed I don't live by the rules, Chris?)

BIG *wink

:o)

~*~

-- (Ladylogic@....), March 24, 2000.

Laura, please reconsider. If you decline, that means Sir Richard wins by default, and there goes your chance to repudiate your reputation as a mindless troll. This is once in a forum's lifetime chance to do so! Sir Richard himself has this reputation established as he was given a formal warning from the administrator to cool down the trolling.

You have all the time you need to compose and repose yourself, and then post the resulting poison.

I understand you have the mind of a rebel and your abhorrance for rules, but just think; you are free to jab as nastily and deadly as you wish within those basic bondaries of the 7-7-5-5-7 rules.

-- Chris (!@#$@pond.com), March 24, 2000.

Ah, come on, Chris....

I'd rather spend my time doing something else.

(Like you, I'd like to have a man who'll take out the trash! Or, at least rub my feet at night :o)

Look for your name in "lights" tomorrow.

(I think you should know; I'd never bash you, I've liked you for WAY too long.)

~*~

-- (Ladylogic@....), March 24, 2000.

Give it up. None of us are important.

~*~

-- Laura (Ladylogic@...), March 24, 2000.

-- give it up lady (giveituppp@giveituppp.xcom), March 25, 2000.

Can I play too?

There was an ol' girl named Logic

That spammed yourdons' clan so methodic

She could not be ignored

So he moved the whole board

If it's censored ya want now you got it!

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), March 25, 2000.

There was a woman named Laura

That loathed being locked out of fora

The hell that "L" raised

Left poor Diane so dazed

She hopped on a plane said "no mora".

L,

I'm not pickin' on ya ; ) It was just too obvious.

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), March 25, 2000.

There once was an old chap named Richard

And when he twitched the monitor flickered

Cause the mouse he had stashed

was lodged so far up his ass

he logged on everytime that he snickered.

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), March 25, 2000.

I'm havin' a freakin' ball.

There once was a feller named Hawk

That could raise one helluva sqawk

As he wiped off his chin

he said "this is Ed my new friend"

I'd come and git ya but I'M too sore to walk ; )

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), March 25, 2000.

There once was a fellow named Ed

Who kept all his good sheeple fed,

a steady regime

of cold rice and old beans

I wonder if it went to his head?

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), March 25, 2000.

I was posting but not everyday, getting ready before Y2K, Now with all of this food, I am not in the mood, and really don't have much to say.

(just lurking these days) ---on de rock--

-- Walter (on de rock@northrock.bm), March 25, 2000.

There once was a chap name of Dick Had a really exceptional trick Cuz although he's a doomer I've heard several rumours He once wrote a good limer-ick.

There once was a fellow named Yourdon, Who's memes loved all the subjects he bored on, He misjudged Y2K But who cares? (they'll still pay For more doom to get out of their gourd on).

(Ok, you try rhyming something with "Yourdon")

Its a funny old thing, Y2K Some were saying we faced judgement day Though it all turned out bright Some still swear they were right I guess "sorry"'s a tough thing to say

And finally . .

Remember the old "Timebomb" forum Never known for its Sysop's decorum Now it's much better run And the posters have fun Without all the extremists to bore 'em.

W

-- (w0lv3r1n3@yahoo.com), March 25, 2000.

so much for formatting . . .

Ooops !!!

you get the gist.

W

-- W0lv3r1n3 (W0lv3r1n3@yahoo.com), March 25, 2000.

There once was a chap name of Dick

Had a really exceptional trick

Cuz although he's a doomer

I've heard several rumours

He once wrote a good limer-ick.

--------------------

There once was a fellow named Yourdon,

Who's memes loved all the subjects he bored on,

He misjudged Y2K

But who cares? (they'll still pay

For more doom to get out of their gourd on).

---------------

Its a funny old thing, Y2K

Some were saying we faced judgement day

Though it all turned out bright

Some still swear they were right

I guess "sorry"'s a tough thing to say

------------------

Remember the old "Timebomb" forum ?

Never known for its Sysop's decorum

Now it's much better run

And the posters have fun

Without all the extremists to bore 'em.

That better ?

-- W (W@same.asbefore), March 25, 2000.

No shortage of material on this forum. I had posted the following to the thread SYSOP I HAVE A QUESTION which inspired it.

Some comical sex crazed buffoons
When not occupied by cartoons
Dispense with decorum
On this Time Bomb forum
And talk about lead filled balloons

-- David L (bumpkin@dnet.net), March 25, 2000.

capnfun

"And when he twitched, the monitor flickered"

The limerick that contains that phrase (the best lines follow that phrase) was outstanding.

-- CJS (cjs@noemail.com), March 26, 2000.

Thanks CJS.

Consumer,I been thinkin' bout ya ; )

There once was a girl named Consumer

Though not quite your typical doomer

For the thing she feared most

was that the whirlpool was toast

or was that just an internet rumor?

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), March 26, 2000.

To someone called OTFR

I'm sorry I don't know who you are

But I'd like to say THANKS

for me and those in my ranks

I'll buy the drinks at the bar.

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), March 26, 2000.