please shipmates lend a hand: The Mackems had a midfielder who went to Burnley I think about 2 seasons ago, last season mebbe. The ugliest get you ever did see.

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

Answers

dodgee spelyr

I think the bloke was called Mullins, but can't recall his christian name - could have been John. I actually think he was signed from Burnley in the first place as a promising striker, but was successfully converted by the makems into a cr@p midfielder.

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

Not the one you're looking for Doggy, Doydjy, Dildo, dodgy, but I think the current most ugly player in the top 4 divisions has to be Jamie Pollock at Manchester.

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

It's Steve Agnew, what an ugly get.

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2000

No Dean Windass he could turn milk sour

Jay

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2000

Not exactly the right place for this, but the posts on here reminded me of a cracking description of Colin Montgomerie, I believe in the Sunday Times, some time ago:-

"He looks like a bulldog chewing a wasp".

Uncannily accurate!

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2000

another variation is:

he/she has a face like a bulldog licking piss of a nettle

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2000

....and yet another slighter variation on the same line is:

Like a camel sucking a biscuit

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2000