A Manure thread, that is.

So Becks has had his hair cut. Big bliddy deal. But what the *&%$ are thre press up to publishing "computer enhanced" pictures of the bairn with his heed shaved as well? How stupid can it get?

On a (slightly) more serious point, I hear that they are contemplating a new "singing section" in the new enlarged Stretford End. Looking at the size of the buildingg works, they must be expecting Pavaroti! It will take the capacity of to 67,000 or so.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Answers

My husband read that the `haircut` cost him a couple of hundred quid! Surely not! If it did, they certainly saw him coming! Still, he can always pay for it by doing the Daveeed thing - `Pledge - `cos I`m worth it`! :o)

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Sky News said that it was 290. Can you believe 290 pounds for a hair cut. It's been apparent for a long time but I'll say it anyway he's got more money than sense. (It's not hard mind)

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

The subject of the Beckham bob generated a whole silly conversation at home yesterday. I was trying to remember what is was that we used say at school when someone arrived with a new haircut. Whatever it was, it was swiftly followed by clip round the back of the head! I was trying to explain to my hubby that it was a similar thing to: `a nip and a punch for the first of the month!` Neither of which seemed to ring a bell with my husband. I further went on to describe a custome, which I must admit I hadn`t heard of until my father told me about it, called `basting`. Apparently, during the run up to a general election, the kids used to screw up newspaper into a ball, tie it to a string, and go around asking their mates who they were voting for. Of course, a wrong answer resulted in you being beaten about the head with the `baster`!

A look of complete and utter incomprehension on hubbys`s face - not unusual when I start on about all things Geordie. OK, so he must have had a sheltered upbringing, being born in Carsholton, Surrey, and all that, but it made me wonder what other childhood delights anyone born outside of the North East must have missed out on!

I realise this is totally non footie, but can you lot think of any! I`ll be happy to do this by e mail only if you prefer!

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

The real reason for the haircut is that Beckhams got nits...the nit nurse was in on Friday - it was a horrible dose. #290 on nit shampoo and then he let Piggy loose on his mop.
Why else would he have his hair cut off? Publicity Stunt? Pah.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

I had cut it for free as it looked such a bloody mess.

2 mins with the ladyshave nothing to it ;o)

Jay

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Wonder if he called Nee Bats? If not we could get him on Bats Nee Revengies.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

To Galaxy

You could claim you were skinsh, then neebody could tig yer.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

To Jack Carter and Pit Bull

Ah-ha! Exactly what I was looking for!

Whilst doing a bit of aerobic ironing this morning, I was trying to remember some of the other things which my husband had never heard of - for instance `hoy oots` at a wedding, `christening bags` dished out to the first child of the opposite sex that you come across after you have had one of yours christened. Also, Jubblies, and Lucky Bags. Putting a coin in the pram when you meet someone with a new baby. Playing `baggsie`, ie. saying `I bags that` - when you see something you want! Playing `kick the can` and `multikitty`! Oops, I`m rambling! Back to the shirts!!!

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

What about "jappin' paste eggs on Easter Monday"

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Re. the 'hoy oots' as the wedding car drew away from the house, if it was all ha'pennies....the nippers bawled out "SHABBY WEDD'N, SHABBY WEDD'N"!!!!

Liquorice (sp!) sticks that went into yellowy fibre when you sucked it. Rice paper flying saucers with sherbet in the middle. And.....??

val.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Beckham and Posh's new hairdos were such a deliberate and blatant attempt to hog the limelight and draw attention away from more praiseworthy events. It was plain to see from anyone with any follical interest, that the real event was Steve Howey's new, um, how can I put it, colouration. So much more subtle and unassuming, bit that's wor Stevie.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Hee hee...I was trying to figure out what exactly Howey was attempting with that 'do'. Just goes to show the difference between paying 300pounds for a haircut, and doing it yourself. ;-)))

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

i was almost going to give 'Becks' an ounce of credit for that cut....until i saw him doing THAT face and THAT pose after his goal- vomit bowl please nurse!

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

and on the sweeties theme: sweet tobacco, cinder toffee, black bullets and sour grapes, and were they called sherbet dabs? You know, the ones with a hollow tube of liquorice through which you were supposed to suck up the sherbet (usually directly into the lungs!) One more, and this may be specific to a certain shop sort of halfway between High Howdon and Rosehill, Brody`s or Brodie`s pineapple ice lollies. Fantastic! The only thing that made visiting me Ganny worthwhile!

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

To Cliff,

We used to roll ours down the Burn (I seem to remember it being called that) It was like a hill that ran down from Holy Cross down towards the Haggi`s factory.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Galaxy,

Most of the sweets you mention are still available - sweet tobacco, cinder toffee, black bullets and sour grapes, and sherbet dabs! And Vals liquorice sticks can be bought in most health food shops. (Cost a bit more than a hapenny a bunch mind). Same with lucky bags.

Is multikitty the same as Moonty-Cuddy - I've never heard that.

C'mon what was you're favorite skipping rhyme?

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

To Pilgrim

Yeah I know most of the sweets are still available, but I don`t eat them now do I! (can`t afford the extra lbs!)

Sounds like it might be the same game! How did you used to play it?

Skipping rhyme would have to be `Jelly on a plate`.

Think I had better start a nostalgia thread in the non-footie section, before I get into trouble!

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Kegsy quote on Becks:"He's got more money than sense"

Aye Kegsy, and now he's got more hair than sense!!!

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Childhood nostalgia ...To: Galaxy

What flavour were those blue ice lollies? What was the game we played with used lolly sticks, where you let them fall in a pile and then had to remove them one by one, using another stick, without dislodging/moving any others in the pile?

ps: I'm still trying to conjure up a realistic picture of you doing "aerobic ironing". I don't recall seeing it on the Jane Fonda video.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

I`m opening a nostalgia thread in the non footie bit!

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000

Nah that's no good Gaaxy....nostalgia ain't what it used to be!

In reference to Becks hairdo....lets hope that him and Keane don't go up for the same ball, a clash of heads and they will stick like bloody velcro.

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2000