Bump In the Road Chapter 3 Feb 26 2000

Saturday is here; Granny's headed over to pick up little Fester with her new wheels. See several weeks ago she was the target of an aggressive driver, this jerk passed her on the highway and then suddenly cut her off taking the Exit ramp. She went down to the Chevy Dealer and purchased a new Z-28 with the 345HP engine. She paid extra and got one of those personal license plates that read "NOBUMP". Headed back to the Lab Fester says, look Granny, there's three of those big arrows in the sky. Looks like they all turned around and are headed back home; and the one is going up and down like a roller coaster; free bump in sky.

Granny is just what Fester needed, she set him up with a soldering iron and gave him a box of electronic parts. He was intrigued with all the color coding on the resistors, said they looked like little firecrackers complete with two fuses. Granny suddenly remembered what they found in her play box, Fester is the guilty one she thought, this Time Machine project will teach him how to create rather than crash and burn. His little hands were perfect for soldering all those wires and components together and besides, she didn't want to see him spend the rest of his life in a haunted house where they keep monsters for pets. Granny downloaded the plans from the Internet.

Granny had decided to use vacumn tubes instead of solid state technology, she knew computer chips were sensitive and could just stop working with no warning. They headed down to Radio Shack, Fester was grabbing all the parts he could reach, the nice man came over and asked if we needed help, Granny said she couldn't find the vacumn tubes, he just smiled and said they haven't stocked them since 1981, and solid state was more reliable. They filled the shopping list best they could. Feeling kinda down about the lack of tubes they decided to make a stop at the coffee shop. Her old buddy Egor was sitting at the counter, they talked and ate pastries, little Fester said they don't sell vacumn tubes at Radio Shack anymore. Egor runs out to his car and brings back this big box of electron tubes, said you can't buy these on the open market, the folks back home in Russia need the money anyway. He had more goodies in his trunk, Granny just said no thanks.

Egor explained that back in the 70's when America had moth balled Electron Tube research the Russians kept advancing. They knew that a nuclear blast would create an electro magnetic pulse that would ionize solid state components for 2000 miles. They came up with what they called a "Grid Cell Array"; it had an amazing storage capacity close to that of western technology and could take on the bumps.

Driving back to the Lab now, Fester says, look Granny, there's a train on the side of the road, looks like it got tired and jumped off the tracks to rest, the other one must have gotten it's coal, it's puffing and smoking like sailor. And look down over there, three houses look completely leveled, and the gas man is playing in the dirt. Must be looking for bump, Granny said one day were going to figure out what's causing all these weird failures, the Time Travel Machine is the answer.

Fester was a Electronic Genius, he even made some design changes to reduce the number of parts needed. The Time Travel Resonator was finished and now there were ready for the chassis. The two of them set out to the Army Surplus store. They needed something that would carry three people and have some way to spin a large static wheel. Fester found a old Hydro Plane back in the corner, it was used to cruise the swamps in Florida, perfect Granny says, all we need to do is remove the fan and install the static generation wheel and controls. They set home, Fester says, look Granny, the creek has pink and white wads of paper floating down stream again, and there's a silver residue on the shore, bump or not, it smells. They work well into the night,. Egor showed up with a Static Wheel, said when the Americans moth balled.....,well you get the drift. Egor drove through downtown, three man hole covers blew right off the road, they went sailing like a Frisbee. Real bump in road, ...SuperMan, where are you now..?...We need that man of Steel.

The Hydro Plane had a strong running gas engine, Fester was worried that if the Time Machine Traveled too far there might not be any gas to get home on. Granny just smiled and said, I'm dusting off the old Still, it'll fit perfect on the Time Machine, it can make Shine even out of weeds. She rigged up a Moon Shine Injection System, said it would do the trick if a quick get away was required. A week later the Time Travel Machine is ready to fly, bump or not.

Next week, Granny and Fester hit Warp Drive and solve the Energy Crisis.

-- Whitecloud (ffello@novaget.net), February 26, 2000

Answers

Uh? Just a slow news day? I just don't get the point.

-- Its (All@Conspiracy.com), February 26, 2000.

Whitecloud,looking forward to the next one.

-- Maggie (song bird@iwon.com), February 26, 2000.