Fast Company, November 1999 Betrayed by Work by Pamela Kruger, p. 182-196

Up until the 20th century work was not a primary part of people's lives. Instead there were other components such as the community, church and stronger family ties that kept people involved outside of the workplace. But now things have taken a new turn where work has become personal. As a result of the new economy, the feeling of being betrayed by one's job is becoming more prevalent than in the past.

Ilene Philipson, a psychologist at Pathmaker, Inc. located in northern California started to notice a pattern with her clients. They were hard-working, devoted employees who had survived other stresses in their lives and yet they were devastated when they were no longer favored at work. Such things as being bypassed for a promotion, getting demoted, or having a less than sympathetic supervisor caused them severe depression.

Philipson then started a new therapy group for people who had problems at work with supervisors or coworkers. The idea was for her clients to help each other. In time Philipson found that these people all had one thing in common. They felt betrayed by their work. Life outside of the workplace had become empty for them. They had immersed themselves entirely into work. Their work ultimately became their raison d'etre. Work was their identity and work defined who they were. One woman said work was her life and when she left her job she felt her life was over. I found that to be a very scary statement and it made me wonder how many people in the general population are going through that. The case studies mentioned in the article were all women. I realize that the article probably leaned more heavily toward the female gender because of Philipson's clients. However, I'm inclined to think that "feeling betrayed by work" probably affects women more because women do have a greater tendency to seek outward approval more frequently than men.

The article stresses that having a job that makes someone feel a part of the community is not a bad thing. The unhealthy part comes into the picture when all the emotional and personal needs are only fulfilled at work. Then if the job turns sour, there is no place to turn to for solace.

In the new economy, the workplace is often played up to be like one big happy family. In reality the workplace is an intensely charged political arena where coworkers are vying for the same limited resources and the winner is not always the most deserving person. If the workplace is a family, then it is most certainly like a dysfunctional one. The article warns that if you put your whole identity into your job, you will run the risk of setting yourself up for feeling betrayed, getting hurt and being disappointed in the long run.

It was very helpful for me to learn the 3 warning signs that your work is becoming personal. I found myself analyzing the warning signs and asking myself if I was falling into those categories.

#1: You rarely miss work. Giving more than 100% to the job makes you a valuable employee but leaves you nothing for your family, friends and other relationships.

#2: What you enjoy most about your job is the praise. It is the need to be needed syndrome. Accolades are good to receive but they're not always dispensed even when a job is done above and beyond the call of duty. Depending too heavily on the praise will only create deep disenchantment.

#3: Your closest friends are your colleagues. Coworkers are competitors and friendships at work can sour. I liked the article's analogy of viewing office friendships like office romance which should be approached cautiously. It's crucial to select friends at work with care.

In this new economy, we are seeing that work is no longer about economics but about identity. How ironic that it is this identity that makes work so inspiring but also that which can cause us to feel betrayed.

-- Anonymous, February 22, 2000