***Warren Bone***

greenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread

I wonder if Gary North, Ed Yourdon and the rest of them will follow Mr. Bone's lead....

JUST OFF THE WIRE: Y2K Expert apologizes for lying to the world about the real facts of world readiness and Y2K.

"The world is ready for Y2K, and has always been ready. I lied."

That astonishing admonition made just today by leading Year 2000 expert Warren Bone at a brief press conference.

Mr. Bone went on to say that there never has really been any problem with computers related to what we dubbed Year 2000. "There is no bug. Never has been." He went on to disclose further, "I really never spent 25 years in IT, and I don't have my MBA, nor did I work as a Year 2000 project manager for over three years. I actually work in a chalk factory in a very small community. I dust erasers. And now I feel really bad that I tried to get people all concerned about this so-called Year 2000 thing that I made up."

"Tell people," he insisted, "to take their extra supplies and stocked up goods back to the store and get their money back, and to not worry at all, because nothing is going to happen. It was all just something I made up and the rest of the world started believing me. And they've been working for years on something that never existed in the first place."

-- Llama man (llama@cool.net), December 14, 1999

Answers

LLama man:

WOW!! Thanks for the post. I think I still got time to return everything. Phew...this is a relief! Well, I guess we can close down the forum now. No need to worry folks. You heard it straight from...whatshisname.

-- Familyman (prepare@home.com), December 14, 1999.


Er... what are you satirising here? It's not really funny or anything. I assume there's some point to it.

-- Servant (public_service@yahoo.com), December 14, 1999.

We Interrupt this Program for a Special News Bulletin

A brilliant piece of sarcasm. Apparently, too brilliant for some. :-)

-- Lane Core Jr. (elcore@sgi.net), December 14, 1999.


When I heard Mr. Bone on Art Bell's show the other evening, I knew right then he was a bonehead. He stuttered most of the time and did not answer any real questions. However, in one of his newspaper articles, he came off as an expert in the Y2K problem. Perhaps he should stick to writing instead of public speaking.

-- ~~~~~ (~~~@~~~.xcom), December 14, 1999.

NEWS FLASH:

The Law of Gravity has been repealed

Square wheels work better

The shortest distance between 2 points is a semicircle

Atomic bombs don't work

Klinton told the truth once

Y2K is a Hoax

....now we are all enlightened!

-- TA (sea_spur@yahoo.com), December 14, 1999.



If Y2K ends up more more "War n Bones," I still won't be very happy with the outcome.

-- coprolith (coprotlith@fakemail.com), December 14, 1999.

I was greatly amused to see a disclaimer on the site that explained the satirical nature of Warren Bone's piece. Apparently a great many people did not catch the BLATANT sarcasm of his article. God help us all...

John Ludi, shaking his head.

-- Ludi (ludi@rollin.com), December 14, 1999.


The average American could be bludgeoned about the head and shoulders with a live tuna, and still not smell fish.

-- Whasat? (Sniff@Sniff.com), December 14, 1999.

Year 2000 Facts, Forecasts, and Areas of Concern

http://www.wbn.com/y2ktimebomb/Computech/Issues/bone9943.htm

-- Year 2000 Facts, Forecasts, and (Areas@of.Concern), December 14, 1999.


When I first read Warren Bone's comments at the above linked website this morning, the following disclaimer was not present, as it is now:

(Note: This article is not meant to be taken literally. It is meant to be read with an eye to sarcasm. Mr. Bone is merely trying to point out the large amount of unsubstantiated, overly optimistic, boilerplate press releases that are being taken as news by many publications and news organizations. In other words, if all of these releases and the subsequent "news" that is based on them were true, then there really would be no Y2K Problem. Westergaard Year 2000 apologizes to any who took this piece literally.)

It is amazing to me that it even needed to be added, as it obviously has. Argggh.

The world is teeming with blind sheep and that's why Clinton and FEMA are so easily pulling this gigantic wad of wool over the masses' eyes, ending with today's announcement of "99.9% compliance of mission critical"... doesn't that figure rub anyone the wrong way?
99.9 ?!!! mmmhmmm

Sure. Nice, 'course the .01% will explain the massive service disruptions (disruptions?? ... make that terminations). Signed sealed delivered. (not to mention the drastically reduced # of systems reduced from "mission critical."

Good luck to ye.

-- Iam (aghast@theworld.net), December 14, 1999.



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