Got Beer?

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They are starting to hoard, with 19 per cent of the
1,377 survey respondents saying they made major
year-end beer purchases by mid-November.

Beer 2K anxiety brewing

-- spider (spider0@usa.net), December 13, 1999

Answers

No, no stockpiling of beer here. Just beans.

Saaaay........how's about us bean folk, get together with you beer folk, and have an "EXPLOSIVE" good New Year?

I mean if everyone's worried about freezing to death this Winter if the power goes out, perhaps instead of "hoarding" kerosene, we simply CHANGE Winter into Summer via Legume-Brew ignition?

If we get both "hoarding" camps together and celebrate with our stashes, the combustion factor and methane emmissions alone are enough to warm the earth's surface for a decade! Schlitz, beans and cornbread - the saving formula of mankind!

Granted we melt the Polar icecaps, but hey....isn't everyone all worried about not enough fresh water to go around? Might as well worry about the lack of fresh air for awhile, but then we'd at least get use of the gas masks we've hoarded. So we win all the way around!

Whaddya say there Greybear? Good idea?

Or does this sound like a bad Kevin Kostner movie?

-- INVAR (gundark@sw.net), December 13, 1999.


INVAR, great concept, but don't forget the potential lethal mixture that would be produced. One stray spark and the resultant fireball would make Nagasaki and Hiroshima look like a wet firecracker!! (This is especially true with me as I prefer to have a smoke with my beer!)

-- Billy Boy (Rakkasan101st@Aol.com), December 13, 1999.

Absolutely Billy-boy.....let us not throw caution to the wind.......or is that "use caution when breaking wind"?????

-- INVAR (gundark@sw.net), December 13, 1999.

I've got 17 cases of homebrew in the basement stacked between a dozen 5 gallon Poland Spring water bottles and 20 cases of Canada Dry. I will not go thirsty!

-- Scottsworth (NewEnglander@Ct.com), December 13, 1999.

This is good Scottsworth. Bring it to the party.

Your Canada Dry and my pickled eggs alone are enough to heat New England until Springtime.

This does not include any fissionable reactions your homebrew may have when coming into contact with Greybear's chili.

They have no idea what REAL global warming is!

-- INVAR (gundark@sw.net), December 13, 1999.



Beer? Damn, you mean no one remembered the beer? Damn! I gotta go for a while kids, BRB

-- Billy Joe Bob (fool@withno.beer), December 13, 1999.

I brew my own. I'm learning how to propagate yeast for the long haul, and I'll have to learn how to malt barley, but it's pretty simple from what I can see. You just have to sprout the seed barley, then dry it when it's partially germinated. You can then use it as is or roast it and make dark beer. Ten pounds of malted barley makes about 6 gallons of beer (note to self: order the seeds for hops this week.) It ought to make for interesting experimentation if I have some extra time.

-- rob minor (rbminor@hotmail.com), December 13, 1999.

Y'now rob, I'll bet that your home brew is as powerful as good home made bean-soup. Rocket fuel.

In fact, I'll bet it's a violation of international law to consume quantities of both near open flame, 'specially after eating beets.

I would imagine that home-brew and bean-stew are classified as a weapon of mass destruction.

No wonder the pollies are so adamant that we not stockpile beans!

The survival of the planet is at stake! Perhaps we start an anti-bean and beer movement?

Nahhhh. That would take all the fun out of my marriage.

Besides, bean and beer movements is what makes life such an olfactory event!

Pull my finger!

-- INVAR (gundark@sw.net), December 13, 1999.


INVAR,

you got that right! There are few farts in this world that can be compared to a good, juicy, "day-after-the-home-brew-dark-double-bock" beer fart. Truly one of man's most under-rated pleasures. Also good for max bragging rights, but only if you're around other guys when it happens (women, for some reason, just don't seem to understand the comic and artistic nuances of a good fart - one of those unexplained mysteries of life, I guess.)

-- rob minor (rbminor@hotmail.com), December 13, 1999.


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