And you wondered why people weren't getting too worked up over Y2K?

I kid you not - this actually appeared in Saturday's BOSTON GLOBE!

Human bowling entails climbing into a huge, mesh ball and rolling down an inflatable ramp to knock down giant pins. Responding to a reporter's speculation about how rolling around in a giant ball might affect someone's mind, Furrow said: ''Well, yeah, but it's healthier than taking drugs.''

Link for doubters

I'm now not expecting any panic at the end of the year... :)

-- John Whitley (jwhitley@inforamp.net), November 28, 1999

Answers

John,

I'm with you...I doubt seriously that we will see any herd movement until the lights (and t.v.) go off and the potato chip trucks can't get through!

-- Sharon (Sking@drought-ridden.com), November 28, 1999.

AAaaargh. The article is about how the Army at White Sands Missile Range is alleged to have misappropriated some $600,000. It is the Army that is indulging in "human bowling" (at a cost of $4,100) and giant rubber chicken suites ($3,225)!

John, thanks for posting the link. I would not have believed it if I hadn't seen it. I don't know whether to laugh or cry...maybe some of each?

-- (RUOK@yesiam.com), November 28, 1999.

"Giant rubber chicken suites"? Are the rooms big or the pullets? And which is rubber? Our tax dollars hard at work!!

-- Steve (hartsman@ticon.net), November 28, 1999.

Steve,

LOL

"It's a combat/commando type of thing" Furrow (a White Sands spokesman) said of the chicken suits, which are used in a game in which one fowl-suited contestant bangs into the opponent hard enough to knock him or her down or out of bounds."

If this is true they need a big rubber suite where they can practice these combat/commando exercises.

-- (RUOK@yesiam.com), November 28, 1999.

This is probably not the place to be admitting this, but the human bowling thing kinda sounds like fun....got an address where I can go sign up for a league?

-- Bokonon (bok0non@my-Deja.com), November 28, 1999.

Sharon,

Please tell what you've heard about the potato chip trucks.

-- J (jart5@bellsouth.net), November 28, 1999.

This raises SO many important questions. The article mentions banging of foul-suited contestants, and says ''You have to understand that we have a lot of active young men here stuck in the middle of nowhere with no way to let off steam. That's all this is.''

So.... am I to assume that these chicken suits are... uh... anatomically correct? I guess that accounts for the cost of $3.225. [wouldn't a blow-up lady have been cheaper and more socially acceptable?] Defense Department inspector General Eleanor Hill thought $76 for a screw was excessive, but compared to the chicken it is a bargain. The article says "The White Sands spending shows the Pentagon's control is far from airtight." Yuck, yuck... inflatable humor.

These activities - the human bowling and chicken banging etc. - are taking place at top secret bases and other army bases all over the country. Considering the recent reports of security lapses at places like Los Alamos, can we be sure the details of these practices aren't falling into enemy hands? Why right now in some Chinese factory, workers could be working feverously on knock-off anatomically correct giant rubber chickens... ready to flood our markets with cheap imitations and undermine the government suppliers [so who DID make those giant chickens.. and are they sold to civilians or do you need top secret clearance in order to purchase one?].

Somehow, knowing about these top secret training exercises makes me feel better about all those Executive Orders and Urban Warfare trainings we've been hearing about. But I can tell you, if I see any giant chickens coming after me... they're headed for the stewpot.

-- Linda (lwmb@psln.com), November 28, 1999.

These expenditures sound like non-appropriated funds, which are to be used for recreational purposes-magazine suscritions, unit parties, clubhouses, etc. Having been out that way (White Sands) recently, and to the equally forsaken National Training Center at Ft. Irwin, Ca, believe me...SOMETHING to blow off steam is needed. Any one with any military leadership experience will tell you the same.

-- Mr. Mike (mikeabn@aol.com), November 28, 1999.

When I was in the military we blew off steam with a $150 ping pong table.

-- Guy Daley (guydaley@bwn.net), November 28, 1999.

Guy, I hear ya, but the ping-pong table was't used too much in my day (mid-late 70s) and the troops have gotten a bit more jaded. Also the chicken suit kinda thing comes in handy on Family Day activities. And knowing our budgetary system...not just military, either...it is "use it or lose it". So the $$$ has to be spent.

-- Mr. Mike (mikeabn@aol.com), November 28, 1999.