My Funniest Prep Purchase(s) or Experience Is ....

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Hey, I've been hit on the head with a sledgehammer putting up the goat fence, top that one, and lived to tell about it (though some think the quality of my posts fell off drastically afterwards).

Plus I've got five pounds of tapioca crystals. I can eat tapioca for many years after the grid goes out permanently. So there.

And ... well, you get the picture.

We've done this before occasionally, but what are your funniest preps and/or experiences? Where have you, shall we say, proven to be one sandwich short of a lunchbox?

-- BigDog (BigDog@duffer.com), November 21, 1999

Answers

I have 10 lbs of Citric Acid. Why? It was a bargain! If my DH just knew of all the bargains I have found over the year........

-- Carol (glear@usa.net), November 21, 1999.

I have accumulated 47 disposable Propane cannisters.I have them in the shed out back.Now I am worried what will happen if they should freeze.Can anyone set my mind at ease on this?

-- Dan Newsome (BOONSTAR1@webnet.tv), November 21, 1999.

400'000 matches, I lost count at 399,896 so I figured I could round it off to 400'000. I have 2 chow chows, they are sisters that could not be anymore different if they tried. One thing they agree on though is dog food, they turn their nose up at the high price dog food, it would set there for a few days before they would eat it, give them Wal-Mart's Ol'Roy and they are in doggie heaven.

-- SgtSchultz (SgtHansSchultz@stalag13.com), November 21, 1999.

Not really a prep. DH, who has persistantly refused to get it. I had been finding little piles of dog biscuits in odd places, and I told him about it. He asked me what I did with them. I told him I threw them out. He jumped up and said "OH No, you've thrown out Hobo's (our dog) y2k stash

-- DuffyO (duffyo@mailcity.com), November 21, 1999.

we got a camping knife for doing handy things around the house during y2k. i put it in a "safe place" where the young males in my house will not be tempted to play with it (or throw it at one another for fun). well, it has been six months and I still haven't found it again yet? guess it must be in a real safe place. i will probably find it in 2001.

-- tt (cuddluppy@nowhere.com), November 21, 1999.


Sgt Schiltz.You are right on the Money about OLe Roy Dog food.My Wife had been buying dog food For Sophy in 20 lb bags for the last six years.After reading in Consumers Report about Ole Roy I finally talked her ito trying it.Our dog loves it.Iwas stunned to learn the old dog food cost 20.00 for 20 lbs.Knowledge like this could strain a relationship! You canget Ole Roy for 9.97 for 50 lbs.Big,Big savings.Try it.Your Dog will love you.

-- Dan Newsome (BOONSTAR1@webnet.tv), November 21, 1999.

After reading all about how food in non-food-grade buckets would smell bad/go bad, I've been suffering over all the food I packed up without using food-grade buckets or mylar bags - but I haven't had a chance to check this stuff until today.

Talked hubby into helping - he pulled bucket after bucket out from under the stairs into the middle of the basement, and I got my iron and my mylar bags and was all set to go, except for one little problem - I couldn't find my O2 absorbers. Looked high and low. Don't have a clue as to where they might be. . . .

Opened up a number of buckets - everything smells fine. Slapped those lids back on the buckets, and hubby put them all back under the stairs. I'll deal with mylar bags later, whenever that is.

When I started this y2k project, I didn't have the gift of organizing. I still don't, only it's much worse now that my basement is full of stuff. ;-)

One thing I didn't do this weekend was a y2k drill - we're just not far enough along. Sort of scary. Maybe mid-December?

-- peg (peg@futureandahope.com), November 21, 1999.


I was contemplating buying some goats.Realising that I needed educating in the ability to spot a good "milking goat",a certain well known contributor to this Forum who shall remain anonymous,offered to drive round with me & teach me to evaluate goat conformation..specifically udder shape.

Since all the goats we came acroos were grazing by the road,you can imagine the looks we two gals received from passing drivers.

-- Chris (griffen@globalnet.co.uk), November 21, 1999.


Every time I went to the grocery store I would stock up on various items during the past two years. When I did an inventory of everything, I realized that I now have 26 tubes of tooth paste. At least we will have clean teeth. Penda

-- Penda Zone (PendaZ@excite.com), November 21, 1999.

1000 Male Catheters.....

Went to an auction a year back and a local hospital was cleaning house, by the pallet. Found a pallet that had a box with 6 of those stainless steel containers with lids you often see gauze or cotton balls in at the docs office. It also had a case of gauze roll bandaging and other misc stuff I wouldn't recognize right off. Anyhow, it came up for bid and I bought it for $20.

I had to unload the pallet into my van and found the catheters...seemed like it would be a years supply for the planet! Well, I was happy with the stainless and roll gauze but there were also a case of rubber gloves, about 500 #22X3/4 needles and 8 cases of paper towels. Tried to give the catheters away for a month until I gave up and threw them away.

-- Don Kulha (dkulha@vom.com), November 21, 1999.



I bought condoms at the .99 cent store. 3 boxes for .99. Now that I am thinking about it....i'm not sure that discount condoms was such a good idea..........

-- Safe (sex@Ithink.Not), November 21, 1999.

I took some old panty hose and cut the legs at the top. Then I put my onions in them. I started with one in the foot, then tied a knot, etc. I did garlic the same way. When I want an onion, I cut at the knot, it works great and saves space. I hung them from the rafters under my house where they will stay cool and dry. Old nylons make great bungie cords and tie downs. I also plan to use old panty hose as a water filter. Stretch them over a 5-gallon bucket and place under gutter spout to filter out leaves, gravel, etc.

-- bardou (bardou@baloney.com), November 21, 1999.

Put some new sights on a rifle and went to sight it in. I didn't have a sandbag, so I used a 50 lb bag of rice.

-- biker (home@the.range), November 21, 1999.

So far Bardou wins the prize ..... but the thread is still fairly early.

-- BigDog (BigDog@duffer.com), November 21, 1999.

I was working on my rabbit hutch. My hutch is made of sturdy wire raised about 3 feet off the ground. Since it is a very large hutch I was inside the hutch making some needed repairs. While inside,the door swung shut and the latch closed on itself and I couldn't get out.

Luckily I had my wire cutters inside with me - I had to cut an opening alongside the latch and stick my hand out to open the latch and let myself out. If I wouldn't have had the wire cutters I would have had to scream for someone to let me out... They would have found me sitting cross-legged in my hutch off the ground. And if I didn't have those wire cutters and if no one would have found me, I could have died in there!

-- mmmm (mmmm@mmmm.com), November 21, 1999.



Greybear is going to refrain from participating from this particular contest. Wouldn't be fair.

Hell, some of the things I do in NORMAL life would sweep the field, and in way of preps, sometimes *I* don't even believe some of the things we've done!

BTW, Big Dog, did your eyes ever un-cross after that unfortunate incident with the sledge hammer? (*Real Men* get stiches.)

-Greybear, who is know far and wide a not having all the cheese on his enchilada.

-- Greybear (greybear@home.com), November 21, 1999.


Another use for old pany hose. Cut 1 inch wide bands from the leg part and use for hair scrunchies. This is what the models use in their hair so you can keep your girls in style and save money. Also makes great bands for holding boxes closed and for all sorts of band uses.

-- Carol (glear@usa.net), November 22, 1999.

35 pounds of bird seed for a 1oz budgie.....As God is my witness, my bird will never go hungry!

-- Mabel Dodge (cynical@me.net), November 22, 1999.

Dehydrated tofu. No kidding. It looks like one of those flat sponges that David Letterman gives away. I thought it would be hilarious to pull it out around the time starvation sets in--you know, when you really, really need a good laugh. Or perhaps not.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), November 22, 1999.

40 pounds of bird seed. No, we don't have a bird. I got it so I could sort out the millet for planting. Figured that we wouldn't have a lot to do in February/March, anyway...............

-- mushroom (mushroom_bs_too_long@yahoo.com), November 22, 1999.

Did you know some bird seed mixes contain hemp seed? They're treated so they won't sprout, but nothing works 100%...

-- helen (sstaten@fullnet.net), November 22, 1999.

Whilst squatting by the metal water trough on the wet ground, I was seized in a most sensitive part of my anatomy by one of a pair of geese (said pair being named Stash and Wanda Goosenecki. Stash was the perpetrater) I grabbed the metal trough to facilitate a rapid rise to my feet and struck the electric fence wire with the top of my head. Being a mature male, I lack the insulating qualities that a thick head of hair would have provided (OK, OK, so I'm bald) I am still vibrating.

-- Lumber Jack (johnsellis@webtv.net), November 22, 1999.

i forgot one. i have this "storage" place in my house that isn't readily noticeable. i have been slogging through plastic bin after plastic bin of STUFF in my family room and moving them to storage. (now i know how noah felt) so i finally thought i had a handle on it and LO AND BEHOLD i found NINE PLASTIC BINS THAT I HAD FORGOTTEN IN MY LITTLE STORAGE PLACE!!! i think i have become obsessed with shopping. I WANT MY LIFE BACK!!!!!!!!

-- tt (cuddluppy@nowhere.com), November 22, 1999.

tt:

canned hams, 2 for $2.99, Walgreens, all week.

-- panjandrum (panjandrum@samfoote.net), November 22, 1999.


Wife went to the store and bought 40 bags of dry breakfast cereal. She said that she must've sprouted a second head on her shoulder, from the looks and questions she got.

(She didn't have the nerve to say she was Y2K shopping, however. Maybe for the best, at this late stage.)

-- Dennis (djolson@pressenter.com), November 22, 1999.


tt and Daniel, ya'll are completely cracking me up! tt, I too, found 3 more buckets up in the attic recently and made another shopping trip, and I too am SO SICK OF SHOPPING IT IS UNREAL!!! And as a Dallas born and bred girl, I never thought I could say that!

I will never feel done. Y2K will force me to be done.

BTW, my funniest prep story was when we were buying another $200 of food at the store and my almost 5 yr old daughter announced very loudly "When we get home we get to put the date on ALL these cans in BLACK MARKER and put them in the closet UPSTAIRS! IT'S FUN!!!!" I cringed and explained we have a big pantry (yes, but upstairs?) Shoulda said we were LDS or something.

-- preparing (preparing@home.com), November 22, 1999.


One hundred and thirty carbon water filter cartridges from K-Mart. Aw, hell, they were only three cents a piece (they'd been marked down a few times). The best part was when the checker had to ring up each piece separately and manually deduct the discount (new cash registers) and then the register locked up (too many items) and it took four people 20 minutes to figure out how to unlock it.

Don K-- in the spirit of your catheters-- we went to a lumberyard auction last year and were bidding on shelving- at least we thought we bidding on shelving. Turned out we were bidding on brick veneer and for 30 bucks we became the proud (?) owners of 2100 pounds of Z Brick.

-- Sam Mcgee (weissacre@gwtc.net), November 22, 1999.


Safe has it at this point. Bargain condoms. HAHAHAHA.

-- anonymous (anonymous@anonymous.com), November 22, 1999.

Am afraid of fires out here in the boonies so bought sun star solar flashlights. Bought a lot. Bought them for christmas gifts for all the family. Started using them last Feb. Would go to barn and halfway thru trip the world would go dark. Bulbs would give out. Contacted mfg. They say they are very particular about just the proper bulb to use we must be doing something wrong. Read Cory Hamasaki's site and started investigating LED's. Along the way found that said bulbs have a life expectancy of 5 hrs. We will get LED's and solve the problem but as of now I have 8-$40.00 flashlights with an infinite power supply and 5 hrs worth of bulbs! Good we found this out now. Pam

-- Pamela (jpjgood@penn.com), November 22, 1999.

I have come to admire and respect people who collect tapioca, matches, male catheters and discount condoms.

I feel at ease with people preseving food using panty hose, that recognize a good goat udder from 50 yards, and that proudly display all the scars on their heads, have homes that may be as nearly cluttered as mine, and can identify millet and hemp from a bag of bird seed.

If this doesn't qualify me for a 72 hour period of observation, nothing will! :-)

-- Lilly (homesteader145@yahoo.com), November 23, 1999.


First trip to Sam's. My wife was GIing (I was very thankful since I wasn't sure how far I could push her.) She drops $1,500 worth of batteries in the cart. I kept my mouth shut (remember: I was thankful). Who needs a generator anyway?

-- Dave (aaa@aaa.com), November 23, 1999.

How many medicos does it take to install a catheter in an armed, awake male survivalist?

-- Hans-Helmut (Nordic@dream.com), November 24, 1999.

I've heard that confession is good for the soul.....I counted up and found that I have 684 lbs of kitty litter. I have one precious little house cat named Penny(she has two thumbs on each front paw-and 7 claws per front paw). I started to name her "nails". Little Penny WILL have a fresh toilet each day!!

-- jeanne (jeanne@hurry.now), November 24, 1999.

The pullets escaped the yard we had them fenced into, and I managed to get them all back inside but one. We'd fenced in the lawn with an electric fence so the horses could come in and graze it down. I chased that %#@??&*# chicken around until I was good and sweaty, and finally caught the little wuzzer in both hands, but fell to my knees (pain!) With both hands on the chicken, I got clumsily to my feet and stood up under the electric fence, right on top of my sweaty head.It's a wonder I didn't cook that chicken right there. When the pulse stopped, I dropped the chicken, and it ran inside the fence! I went whimpering into the house, one hand rubbing my fried head, the other nursing my skinned knees.

-- Liz Pavek (lizpavek@hotmail.com), November 26, 1999.

I have a juicy one that just happened. Usually I'm the klutz (ask everyone in my family, it's notorious), this time it was Ms. Big Dog. Just received my ham rig and we've been thinking of where to put it. Well, it was my wife, the very same Ms. Big Dog, who proposed that we could put the antenna up on the old, no longer used BIG satellite dish and just connect it to the ALREADY BURIED coax that runs from it into the house.

One one small problem.

The day before (three days ago), she cut the coax at the house and threw that part in the trash, which was picked up.

You need to understand that my wife NEVER throws anything away. We rarely fight but when we do, it's generally because of something I threw out. GI?

Yes, I know, we can splice coax to the coax that is still under ground, but I thought the story still fits this thread quite well, no?

(She was very embarrassed but it was too funny to get upset about).

-- BigDog (BigDog@duffer.com), November 26, 1999.


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