Clinton to crash Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve with announcement -To say what?greenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread
Just heard on MSNBC that Clinton will make a statement just before midnight and preempt the countdown. Anyone guess as to what he might talk about? "Happy New Year"...?, "Des are ur maaching horders!"
-- Keith Nealy (firstname.lastname@example.org), November 02, 1999
good one!!! such humor in the am.
-- tt (email@example.com), November 02, 1999.
Yeah, I'm laughing so hard I've got orange juice splashing out of my nose.
-- Butt Nugget (firstname.lastname@example.org), November 02, 1999.
After watching Monica loose 100 lbs. and get $1,000,000. from Jenny Craig, I have decided to spend the rest of my life with her. Now that she is thin, rich and young, Hillary's got nothing on her. Ladies and gentelmen the new first lady!
-- Bill (email@example.com), November 02, 1999.
How about: It is with profound concern for the welfare of the right thinking members of the proletariat that I am announcing that the last of the major combat units of the former United States have been effectively dispersed overseas and that I am opening up all of our international airports and seaports to welcome 20 million volunteers from the People's Republic of China to help with internal security. Please cooperate with them and they won't kill you and your family and your neighbor and your neighbor's dog. Everybody understand?
-- chairborne commando (firstname.lastname@example.org), November 02, 1999.
chairborne commando, you made my day
-- Providence (email@example.com), November 02, 1999.
you will have to surrender your dogs to the chinese volunteers for their traditional new years dinner.
-- chowhound (firstname.lastname@example.org), November 02, 1999.
ROFL! Good one hound.
-- haha (email@example.com), November 02, 1999.
Yes, Monica is getting 10,000. big ones from Jenny for each 10 pounds she loses. Hell, she is dummy, she gots a million in her ass alone.
Thanks to Letterman for the free joke.
-- SgtSchultz (SgtHansSchultz@stalag13.com), November 02, 1999.
Monica must have given that doctor the idea for the high-protien diet that's all the rage. (Sorry, I couldn't resist!)
-- TECH32 (TECH32@NOMAIL.COM), November 02, 1999.
1) I have decided to retire from public service, effective immediately (just as the lights go out...)
2) I hereby declare marshal law and suspend the constitution...
3) You see, I told you that there would be no problem with Y2K (as the lights go out...)
4) Nothing (it's hard to say anything meaningful into a sleet covered microphone to a crowd that has gone home long ago...)
5) As I speak, all accross the nation, FBI and local law enforcement officials are rounding up subversive groups who have stored food, clothing, guns, fuel, and seeds...especially the religious fanatics...
6) I hereby dissolve congress...
7) I and my wife (who unfortunately could not be here tonight) wish you a very happy new year...(as he moves off to meet the new crop of interns...)
-- Mad Monk (firstname.lastname@example.org), November 02, 1999.
"I'm leaving Hillary for Al Gore."
-- CHEESY BITS (CHBT@DWA.ZXY), November 03, 1999.