OT My Fellow Americans, Members of Congress, Supreme Court Justices bla bla bla. I have recently been informed of a significant problem that may have lif altering consequences for the American People. Vice President ALGORE has informed me that althogh we are on track to fix the problems, all of thegreenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread
problems will not be fixed. I have ordered all Federal, State, and local government officials involved with computers to devote full time to fixing these problems by 11-31-99 with a full month for testing. Unfortunately there was one area of computer problems that we failed to recognize util early 1998 that is known as the embedded systems problem. These computer chips are very difficult to test and although only a small percentage will fail, we do know know which ones will fail or when they will do so. We will attack this problem in the power plants, in the communications centers, in the electric distribution systems, in the banks, in the oil fields, in the refineries and we will win this battle if you all will work together. Unfortunately there will be some minor problems that will not be fixed that will cause minor disruptions of electricity, natural gas, water, sewer systems, pipelines, oil fields, refineries, oil tankers, railroads and banking systems. The postal system will not work, Federal retirement, salary and social security checks will not be available, Medicade reimbursements may not work and other glitches will occurr. Every one should acquire and store enough safe water and food to last 30 days until the systems can be fixed. Do not depend on the government. They will be too busy fixing infrastructure systems and working on emergencies to be much help to individual citizens. We can do this if we work together. Do not panic. ALGORE and I will fix it after some minor delays. Other countries will have worse problems than our great country and the stock market will continue to rise, interest rates will fall and there will be jobs for all. Tell your Senators and Representatives that you want Marshal Law so that the Government can protect the citizens if needed. Also I want everyone to turn in their guns so that these guns are not used to commit violent acts against other citizens who are trying to steal food to feed their families. Hillary has promised to lead a task force to work on the problems. We can succeed. All leaves of the programmers will be cancelled until after 1 1 00 er 2000.
-- Moe (Moe@3stooges .gom), August 26, 1999
Shit. I was hoping for Marshal Dillon.
-- a (firstname.lastname@example.org), August 27, 1999.
A blast from the past, yet topical, IMHO:
-- Tim (email@example.com), August 27, 1999.
Good analogy. In 1938 Wittaker Chambers raised an alarm about communist infiltration into key area's of our govt. 10 years later they finally got to it.
McCarthy did not complete the job.
An emergency of immense proportions is required to remove the sovereign thought of the populace.
Shouting there is a problem to the problem just doesn't work.
-- R. Wright (firstname.lastname@example.org), August 27, 1999.
Gee Moe, wasn't this the speech that was supposed to be given last summer? I remember how many 'insiders' were remarking how the President would 'prepare' the American people, and oddly enough, never did.
In the incredible shell game known as Washington politics, Monicagate and Kosovo seemed to put the issue out of the public's collective consciousness, with help from the media.
And you think this kind of speech is gonna hit now, eh? 4 months from the date rollover?
-- Bad Company (email@example.com), August 27, 1999.
Al Gore invented the internet, so he should be able to fix Y2K singlehandedly.
-- a_programmer (firstname.lastname@example.org), August 27, 1999.