Spotlight on the female abuser, detroit newsgreenspun.com : LUSENET : Domestic Violence Accounts : One Thread
-- Anonymous, August 08, 1999
I have been in a situation of verbal abuse, and my husband doesnt believe he is doing this . How can I get him to reconize this.
-- Anonymous, November 08, 1999
My advice to you maxine, which may sound a little extreme, is to get a voice-activated tape recorder or a recorder of some kind, and tape your conversations with your husband-without him knowing it of course. When you feel you have enough to confront him with play the tape for him, then reiterate that what he has just heard himself say is verbally abusive to you. I don't think he'll be able to argue while he's eating his own words.
-- Anonymous, January 18, 2000
I agree with Becky, except be careful with the way that you confront your husband with this information. If you do it in the middle of a fight he will just get angry and it could turn to a more drastic form of abuse. Present the tape during a calm discussion when both of you are in a good mood, and tell him that this kind of talk makes you feel bad and why it makes you feel bad. Keep your voice level and keep eye contact. This is a suggestion from experience.
-- Anonymous, April 04, 2000
be careful. You may find out that you are abusing and attacking him first. That is what my wife found out when she did that.
-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000
I AM A COUNSELOR, PLEASE BE CAREFUL. BEST BET IS TO RECORD HIM, AND WHEN YOU PLAY IT BACK FOR HIM, PLEASE BE IN A PUBLIC PLACE WHERE YOU BOTH ARE AT EASE, MAKE SURE NO ONE ELSE CAN TELL WHAT IS SAID, SO IF HE GETS UPSET YOU ARE IN A SAFE PLACE WITH PEOPLE AROUND YOU AND YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LEAVE WITH HIM AND SOME ONE CAN CALL 911 FOR YOU
HOWARD C. MINER PEER COUNSELOR
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SURVIVORS SUPPORT GROUP, INC. P.O. BOX 8701 SOUTH CHARLESTON, W.V. 25303 (304)342-7752
-- Anonymous, February 02, 2001
Recently, my wife heard a phone recording of herself doing one of her drunken rants. She was appalled, even more so when she heard that this is how she always sounds. But being the good alchoholic that she is, she was drunk and ranting again that night. I am curious whether there have been any studies linking drug/alchohol abuse to DV. It seems, at least from my experience, to have a definite relationship. Also it may explain the rise in female violence, as Drinking by women has increased in the past generation.
-- Anonymous, April 06, 2003