I've got one. He's kind of moping around this morning, missing Jeremy and chewing on his rawhide. I've been sort of ignoring him while I wrote up my entry, because he was being good and staying out of trouble. For the last ten minutes or so, he's been asleep at my feet.

I just got up to get a second cup of coffee, and Doc walked into the kitchen with me, still making his little mopey grumbly noises. I turned to him and said, "Want to go for a walk?" and that was when I noticed he was wearing a pair of my underwear on his head.

Now I know what that grumbly noise means: "Who turned out the lights?"

-- Anonymous, July 23, 1999

Answers

Speaking of torturing puppies... One day shortly after we moved into our house a few years ago, our two dogs were busily exploring their new backyard while we unpacked boxes, etc. We thought the house was a really good match for us, since the attached garage also had a door leading directly to the backyard. This meant our dogs could come into the garage whenever they wanted to cool off and get some shade, since we had no trees or shade at the time. The doorbell rang, and my husband opened it to find a couple whom he assumed to be some of our neighbors dropping by to introduce themselves. The first words out of their mouths were, "You have a black dog, right?" "Yes," he replied, puzzled as to how they knew this. It turns out they had been looking out an upstairs window at their house and noticed our black puppy, Dash, running around our backyard with a large potato chip bag stuck on his head. Apparently, he had dug the bag out of the trash in the garage and was trying to eat the last few crumbs in the bottom. With his vision totally obscured, he kept walking into the fence and the back of our house. While this may not sound too funny at first, he was fine and unhurt, just confused. The really embarrasing part was when he got ANOTHER bag stuck on his head the next week! This is a border collie who should be smart enough not to do it TWICE. Needless to say, we are now careful to block off the trash so our little scavenger can't get to it.

-- Anonymous, July 23, 1999

I don't know how funny this is, but Ginger learned to use her crate to her advantage this morning. I'd given her a little rope toy last night, so that she wouldn't chew on the cords. She played with it and abandoned it before bed.

This morning Mack, one of our other dogs, showed up in the kitchen with it and carried it back to the bedroom. Ginger finished her breakfast and I was taking her back to her crate and I guess she decided she wanted the toy. She scurried over to where Mach was chewing it, grabbed it before he knew what was going on, and dashed for her crate and gave me the look, "Shut the door! Shut the door! I've got the goods." I've never seen her so happy in her crate.

-- Anonymous, July 23, 1999

When Cecil was a puppy and first started going for walks I would take him to riverside park and let him run off the leash because for the most part he stayed pretty close to me. The only time he ever strayed was one day he saw a pigeon in the the grass and went off the chase it the only problem was he did not see the fence that was seperateing him and the pigeon. So he barreled full speed ahead right into the wire fence flipped upsidedown shook off and came running back to me. From that day forward he has never strayed from me in the park again. I think he learned his lesson.

the other thing he did and still does is when he and my cat are fighting and the cat starts getting the better of him he will start limping and hobble up to where ever I am sitting and once the cat walks away he will get up and run and play again. When I first saw this happen I really freaked out I thought he was hurt and there was something seriously wrong with but when I took him to the vet and explained what was happening and she took some X-rays and figured out that there is nothing physically wrong with him and that he fakes it to get the cat away from him

-- Anonymous, July 23, 1999

Knowing that my parents dog, Heidi, liked water I was trying to squirt her with the hose one day. She didn't seem too interested so I asked my stepdad if she liked to be sprayed. He said not really, so I dropped the hose and started walking away. I looked over my shoulder and noticed Heidi biting at the hose until she picked it up. I asked my stepdad what she was doing and he answered that it was my turn, and she proceded to chase me around the yard spraying the hose at me!! Luckily I out ran the length of the hose and got away with only a couple of muddy paw prints on my clothes.

-- Anonymous, July 24, 1999

My dog is a walking funny story.

However, some of the most interesting stories involve things she has digested.

Oh, like:

an entire bottle of advil
those waxy blocks of ant poison
a dictionary
rubber bands
a bag of pot (no it wasn't mine)
a bee
various candles and potpourri
the handle off a phillips screw driver
the plug off a vacuum cleaner
used sanitary napkins (which at that point are no longer very sanitary)

All except the last (a reoccurring nightmare in my household) happened during puppyhood and most resulted in a trip to the veterinarian. Both the advil and the bee caused a trip to the doggy emergency room.

All that and she's still the happiest, healthies one-eyed dog around.

Jackie

-- Anonymous, July 24, 1999

Uh Yeah. Sorry for the run on list there.

I suppose I could have at least used commas.

One day I'll figure these boards out.

Apologies, Jackie

-- Anonymous, July 24, 1999

Don't worry, run-on girl. I am here to save you. See? I am all powerful and I fixed it.

-- Anonymous, July 25, 1999

When the family's bassett hound was a puppy, she was really tiny (as I guess puppies are wont to be), but her ears were huge. So she'd be romping around outside, trip over her ears, do a sort of somersault, get back up and continue along her merry way.

Maybe you had to be there?

-- Anonymous, July 26, 1999

Oh, no, we had a bassett hound. I can picture it! When I was little, I was scared to death of her because she used to lick my face and knock me on my butt. (I was about three.)

Doc has done many funny things recently, the latest being peeing on the mailman. Eating bugs is my favorite thing he does, though.

-- Anonymous, July 26, 1999

In the mornings, Doc will not do a thing until you've sat down on the floor and accepted a puppy kiss. He might go out to pee if he really has to go, but he won't come back in the house, he won't eat, he won't move at all until he's gotten his daily allotment of affection.

It's pretty funny to see him sitting by the food dish, ignoring it entirely, and looking at you with the saddest face ever. As soon as you sit down, he comes lumbering over and slobbers all over your neck. THEN he'll happily devour whatever you put in front of him.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 1999

This isn't funny, but it is very cute.

This morning I was out with Ginger at the usual 5:15. I was pretty tired so I was stitting on the front stoop with my head in my hands wondering how the hell she gets up at the same time every day.

She came running up, sat next to me and when I looked at her she covered my face in kisses.

Yeah, that's why I got a puppy.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 1999

...despite all of my ranting yesterday, i still love my boyfriend's puppy joey...the best is seeing him careen around the park...since he hasn't grown into his legs yet, he always carries this mixed expression of pure bliss and "where the hell are the brakes?!"...

...it is only a matter of time before he runs smack into you and then wiggles off for more fun...

-- Anonymous, July 28, 1999