snail mail or e-mail?

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Which one do you prefer? Do you think the art of the handwritten message is lost? Do you still write long, delicious letters to friends and family or have you been reduced to short little paragraphs to keep everyone's attention?

Do you think we'll still have snail mail in 2010?

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999

Answers

I started to write an answer to this but it was becoming way too long so I decided instead to do my journal entry tonight on this subject. ooh, I'm excited now. :-)

If any of you are crazy enough to want to read it, my URL is:

http://www.lucids.com

It should be up around 11:30pm.

Believe me, my head is hanging very low at the shameful plug to my journal, but I only did it because I always love reading what people write in this forum and maybe there is actually one person out there that is interested in what I write as well. Just incase. :-)

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999


Does anybody remember that 12 hour Ken Burns Civil War documentary on PBS in the late 1980s? While showing these ancient photographs of unshaven men standing in an ill-fitting uniform, with as much dignity as they can muster, the actors would read their letters. With no more than a fourth grade education, a soldier would write his wife how his love for her would live beyond the grave, in a cool breeze on a hot summer day, in the faith he had in their children, in the lifetime they shared together.

When I was a substitute teacher for a year, I remember collecting essays for an absent teacher. Glancing at one essay, I noticed one kid commented on applying to pre-med schools, and how his favorite comic book superhero was Quasar.

When people I know, who are into the latest innovations, tell me I'm missing out, I've learned it's best to just give them my best Oh, darn! I'm a stupid idiot! then go home and eat a bagel.

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999


ohmigod... you've just made me stop and realize that it has been years since I've last sent a real genuine snail mail letter to anyone. I mean paying bills doesn't count. And business type letters don't count either... Nor does a note scribbled in a Christmas card promising to write a genuine letter real soon now...

When I'm someplace interesting on a business trip I tend to send a lot of postcards to friends. I guess postcards don't count either.

I think I've not written a real snail letter since my son who lives in Brooklyn got his machine connected to the Internet three years or so ago. Just email. Lots of email. But no real letters.

Wow.

Back in my college days I used to feel somewhat intimidated by reading the collected letters of various 19th century literary figures, beautifully worded, erudite, polished... Friends and I used to joke about how feeble our own correspondence would look in such company. Then one day, while doing research on author Stephen Crane (The Red Badge of Courage, etc.), I came across a volume of his letters. He used slang, sentence fragments, and talked about baseball teams and picking up girls in Poughkeepsie, except for some dated slang sounding just like any other twenty yr old male, sounding just like my friends and I sounded in our letters...

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999


I type faster than I write, my handwriting sucks, and I can type a letter while I'm typing Press Releases, but I can't multi-task handwriting and typing (duh!). So I way prefer email. Plus the fact that it's instant. I love being able to write to people 4 or 5 times during the workday. You can actually have a conversation with them when they are not there.

So in that sense, email can be more personal than snail mail, but of course, not as personal as face-to-face, which is always my preference.

Snail Mail will always be around because in our old age and senility, we'll forget how to use all technology. So it'll mainly be an old-person's medium, but around nonetheless.

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999


I love to write letters, and, more importantly, I live to get them. I'm actually kind of annoyed that I've gotten so into this e-mail thing because a lot of the people who used to write me letters don't do so anymore.

I still write to some people, though. I just got a letter from my friend who's in Japan. She writes on the backs of student papers (she's an English teacher), restaurant placemats, ads for call girl services, whatever she finds amusing. Her handwriting is small and neat, and she never capitalizes (handwriting is so important to know about a person). She sends me wrappers from Japanese junk food with nonsensical English phrases on them. She sends me Print Clubs - little sticker photos of her with her friends.

You can't get all that stuff through e-mail. Nothing will ever replace the sensation of a letter in my mailbox.

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999



I tried to hand write a letter to a customer today (for that personal touch) and I realized, that handwritting is a "use it or lose it" kind of thing.

During Catholic grade school (8 friggin' years) I always received compliments from the nuns on my "cursive" writing (and believe me, that is the only good thing they ever told my parents) so I was really surprised to find my letter looking like total crap. Then I remembered -- the most I write at once these days is a check or a grocery list.

I have to start writing letters to people instead of just typing emails.

PS -- GREAT PICTURE, PAMIE (I'm jealous you got to put your hands where Vinnie Barbarino himself once stood.)

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999


A few years back, I was into mail art, and used to have tons of really cool stuff (fake postage stamps, tiny perfectly bound books, homemade stickers) waiting for me in the mailbox when I got home. I also met many very cool and talented people who shared a lot of info and insight. I miss them. So, I think we should have a bit of both. There's some stuff you just can't get across in email.

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999

I always, always, always wrote letters in high school. I wrote letters and I wrote notes. I was great at keeping up long distance relationships because I'd write these incredibly lengthy letters (often requiring five or more stamps) and said boy would feel so guilty that he had to call me. So he'd call and we'd talk all night and then I'd write all day.

When I first got to college my then-boyfriend and I lived in different cities. We both wrote each other a letter a day.

When I was a kid since I moved around a lot and eight year olds don't get to use AT&T too much I had most of my correspondence through letters. We would send each other "treasure letters" that would be filled with clippings, little notes, puzzles we made, candy or even jewelry.

I missed losing touch with my friend Heather because we would send each other the best stuff. Same with my friend Tamara. We would write letters back and forth inside a notebook. We called it "The Journal" and we'd switch who had the journal between classes. We filled up three of those things in a year and they were highly coveted among our classmates since we shared a lot of secrets in there. We'd draw each other pictures and have other friends write little notes once in a while and every few months or so we'd sit down and read the whole journal from the beginning to the end.

One thing that did stay with me from letter writing to e-mail was my ability to write FOREVER. I swear, if you let me go I'd just type and type away. Sometimes people feel guilty for not returning a letter as long as the one I sent, but I never expect something so long in return.

I know where I get it from: when i was a little girl I remember big manilla envelopes coming in the mail written in a green sharpie pen-- my grandmother sent my mother a thirty-page letter a month. Mom would make herself a cup of tea, light a cigarette and sit down for an hour or so. I always thought that was really intimate, just being able to be there for an hour with someone, even though you couldn't be there in person.

And as I've so excellently illustrated, I have a bit of my grandmother in me.

But to answer the question: I don't think that snail mail will go away as long as there are romantics, and as long as people use aol and have internet providers who won't give unlimited access to the internet. As long as stationery is pretty and stamps keep changing, I know I'll keep writing letters.

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999


I agree with Pamie that letters won't go away as long as there are romantics. I only have one person I still write letters to, and I think I enjoy recieving those more than e-mail. Its just something about letters that seems more personal than e-mail. So yes, even though I think e-mail will replace most snail mail, there will always be a place for handwritten letters.

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999

Effort is a big issue.

I hate my handwriting, but I love the tangibility of mail...so I often compromise and type the letter, including photos and/or little scraps of memories, and mail that.

However, I admit freely that I use email 99% of the time, and it's rare that I'm able to mail out a letter.

I sent a carepackage to a friend in need a month ago, and that was a big project --- it was good fun, tho... rummaging around in dollar stores for funny things, and wrapping everything separately. I imagine the "hey, my old friend went to all this trouble to show that she loves me.." was probably more important than "gee, she sent me some slime, and water guns..... hmmmm..."

Just a thought...

-- Anonymous, June 10, 1999



Pamie, you are so beautiful! I mean it. You always talk about yourself kind of badly, so I thought you were sort of nerdy looking (sorry) :) Also, your hair. DO NOT CUT IT!
Umm, about the email. I always use email unless I'm writing a special love letter or to someone without a computer. I used to love writing letters, but now I can't stand writing anything long by hand. The email has spoiled me.

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999

I do both. I tend to email most of my friends, mainly because they're mostly in NZ and it takes a week for a letter to get there. Tristan and I have been known to email each other twenty times a day (and every one is complete drivel), but I also post him little presents every now and then, just to make his morning more exciting.

None of my family have email addresses - they seem to be flatly refusing to enter the 21st century. My parents have a fax at their house, and I fax very long letters to my Mum and two sisters. My handwriting is appalling and I type 80 words a minute, so I always type my letters (which is apparently simply dreadful, manners-wise, as only business letters are supposed to be typed). I had to write post-wedding thank you cards recently and my hand nearly fell off after about twenty. But sit me at a keyboard and you'll easily get ten or twelve pages out of me, but it will mostly be absolute rubbish. My family seem to enjoy it, though.

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


Oh, I adore snail mail. I love to get it - even just notes jotted in cards. And I love fancy ink pens. I used to write constantly. My best friend and I had about half our classes together through a lot of high school, and we'd write notes back and forth all the time. Most of our teachers finally gave up trying to make us stop. I guess they figured that as long as we were passing the class and not disturbing anyone else... And I had a pen-pal in England all the way through high school, but we sortof fell out of touch later. He was adorable - every letter ended with a short poem. (Scott, what happened to you??!?)

I love to write. But I don't do it much anymore, because most of the people I'd want to write to have e-mail. I type much faster than I write, and my handwriting isn't very easy to read.

But I love to write. If anyone wants to be my penpal, e-mail me and we can exchange snail-mail addresses!

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


Wow Pamie! That's too cool! I didn't think anyone else did those notes notebooks in highschool - exchanging them back and forth between classes. Those were so fun to do and read back over after a long time...I just can't believe all the boys we talked about and were in love with and the things we wanted to do and go see.

What memories.

I'd love to have more people to snail-mail with...I like writing letters and it seems like the whole idea is dead anymore.

I might just take Liz up on her offer of pen-pal. What a cool idea!

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


Email is great for people like me, for whom handwritten letters just aren't the right medium. I used to think I wasn't much of a letter writer --much to my mother's dismay -- but then I got access to email, and soon I was tossing three to four-page missives off every week. Too bad Mom doesn't get email.

I definitely agree that there is an art to handwritten letters; it's just not my sort of art. I bought "How To Write Love Letters" in the hopes of some inspiration while wooing a lady from afar, but since it wasn't really love, I felt much more comfortable penning a bit of poetry and then reading it to her on her answering machine.

I don't think snail mail will go anywhere for quite a while, because old habits die hard and we still don't have a way to send clothing as an attachment. But I suspect that the government will start diverting funds from the USPS to a national electronic mail system, and then traditional post will become more expensive.

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999



I used to write letters, but I never seemed to get many answers. Now I write emails to all my friends who have it and I GET ANSWERS! I love that. I don't write to any of my friends without email anymore. I feel bad about that sometimes...but I get soo much more mail now online and I keep in much closer touch with friends all across the country and the world who have email. I Love It!!! My mom even has it now!

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999

I love writing letters. Usually I type them. I also have pretty good handwriting (I'm not going to win a prize or anything, but it's legible and I've had a few compliments on it). More than writing them I love receiving them, only most of my friends have my e-mail address so only my mom writes to me and it's usually a clipping from a newspaper that tells about someone from high school getting married or arrested.

I think snail mail will remain long into the future. Didn't anyone see that Kevin Costner movie?

Last year a friend of mine sent me a chain letter that had a really cool idea...sort of built on the pyramid $5 bill scheme, but with paperback books. You send a paperback book to all five people on the list, then remove the person from the bottom of the list, put your own name at the top and send it along to five new people.

In theory, it was really cool. In practice, I sent out five books and got none in return.

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


Damn you Pamie. I can't work when Squishy is so much more interesting. *sigh*

I feel guilty now. I have a friend in Colorado Springs who I love, she's the bestest friend of my life, she's my chosen sister. I haven't written her ONCE since she's moved there. I DO call her and we talk and stuff, and I did email her when she had a roommate with a computer, but I have never once written her. I'm a bad friend. Now I feel all guilty and like I have to go home and make her paper with little dead flowers stuck in it and craft a big fancy envelope to send it in and then caligraph(y ?) all the words, and then tie the whole shebang with raffia twisted onto gold pinecones. I don't write on PAPER...sheesh, that's what a printer is for..helllooooo! Just kidding. Really, I do feel guilty now. I think i'm calling my friend RIGHT NOW. Bye! MellieBee

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


I mostly email, especially my family and friends in Australia who have email, as like Jackie said, my rels are O/S (australia for me), and it's just so timely to email or ICQ. I love sending cards though, birthdays, or any sort of postcards. I know what a buzz I get when I get real snailmail, so I like to spread that buzz around.

On the subject of penfriends, I got an email from a 12 year old girl recently who said 'I realise from looking at your picture you're much older than me' (gee, thanks child...) 'but would you like to be my penfriend?' I was lousy at writing penfriends letters when I was 12, I'm not sure what to say to this girl.

Jeff says she's probably a 40 year old guy being creepy..

Oh yes, if anyone would like a postcard, I (like Pamie) love the new stamps and stuff that the USPS keeps releasing, so let me know. US or International, I don't mind, 20c for US, $50c for O/S, no fiscal biggie.

A.

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


Yeah, I think the art of the handwritten letter has really died off. Its kind of upsetting. I remember the 'good old days' when I would get handwritten letters on funky stationery in quirky little envelopes. I felt so loved whenever I got a long meandering letter from camp in the mail. I guess people wrote more to make it worth the 32/33 cent stamp.

But now, it's always- 'what's your e-mail address?' and I get this three sentence 'what's up? nothing here. got to run' thing. Its so impersonal. I miss those handwritten letters.

But me personally- i still try to write long meandering letters to people when I'm out of town. This summer I'm going away to a college thing and I've already collected the necessary supplies for a great letter. Zodiac sign mats for stationary. Magazine ad envelopes. The wily Gelly Roll pen. Grrr. I also got somewhat inspired by Pamie's own 200 page letter writing spree back in the day. So I plan to singlehandedly carry snail mail into the 21st century.

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


wow! i love hand-written letters. i love writing them, i love getting them, i love the feel of paper and pens and ink and oh-my-gawd i am so excited now. (i had a bad day) i have a fountain pen that fills from an ink-well, and i write with it all the time. i collect paper. i wish i had someone to write to. (my boyfriend sees me with paper and groans) i don't think handwritten letters will ever really die, though they're scarce. i think there's something incredibly sensual about picking up a pen, sitting at a desk or a picnic table or a book on your lap, and writing. characters on a computer screen pop up with no thought, no careful formation of curves and lines. a handwritten letter is such a joy! and "i love you" in glossy black ink on lightly tinted paper, in an envelope that's been addressed by hand... it's just so much more meaningful than anything that comes through a computer screen. in my opinion.

hmm... if anyone's looking for a penpal, send me an email and we can trade addresses. if you want. i'd love that. :)

-- Anonymous, June 11, 1999


I've always been horrid at writing letters by hand, and In the rare occasions when I do hand write letters you can't read them (the only thing I ever did poorly on in grade school was handwriting, and in high school I had to read a handwritten final exam essay to my engish teacher, and I had trouble with it). As a result thet have gone the way of the dinosaur.

Now phones, I love talking to people on the tele. It is so much more direct than these words written on a page.

-- Anonymous, June 12, 1999


Me and my best bud, Bobby, exchanged notes all through junior high and high school. You know how you would fold them into the little square or triangle with the pull tab? We did this almost every day; writing a reply maybe, and passing it back between classes. We would go through phases where they were 'in code'. Different years we would have different nicknames relating to whatever we were calling each other that year: Hoser, Hosehead, Great White Hoser, Mr.T, Hannibal, Breath, Dumbass, whatever...you get the idea. So we would create these notes, write the receipients nick,--mini-masterpieces. Over the years I kept all mine. Every single one; I even had quite a few that I had written him that he had given back for some reason or another. So I ended up with most all these notes. When he got married I had this great idea. I went to Kinkos and copied all these notes. Then I folded quite a few of them into their original shape and configuration. One of the nights before his wedding I gave them to him. We sat down and read these things all night, and laughed 'till we cried. He was really touched--I didn't realise how much this would turn out to mean to him. It was pretty cool.

In answer to the questian; I tend to ramble on about things that most folks couldn't care less about. So I don't write as much as I used too because it seems like.....well, I think I already stated the obvious---most folks couldn't care less.

My wife also gets irritated because I don't write poems like I used too. It just seems that she started taking these long, involved, soul- baring verses for granted. So I quit for awhile. I wasn't trying to be mean. I just wanted feedback. Like with letter writing; after awhile you just stop if the other person doesn't write back.

Man, somebody stop me already.

-- Anonymous, June 12, 1999


i still write letters by hand, i even have a pen-pal in france...how outdated is that? i write letters to my friends, even if they live nearby. i was writing a letter during an english class in school, and my teacher was amazed that i had written two full pages by hand..."i didn't think anybody did that anymore..." there's something about letters, especially handwritten ones, it makes you want to keep them forever. i have shoeboxes full of old love letters and hate letters, which i keep even though they are years old, i can't bear to toss them, yet i find myself pushing that delete button on my email often. i found a box of letters in my basement, correspondence between my parents before they were married, living in different states while my mother finished school. i'm sure at the time they were unaware of the treasure they left for me to find, for them, it was just keeping in touch. i desperately hope we don't lose "snail mail" but i can see it becoming a possibility...

-- Anonymous, June 14, 1999

I don't think snail mail will ever die. People like getting them too much. They're more fun to write, and decorate, and send. E-mail is no fun. You don't get to stick stickers all over it, decorate the envelope, include glitter and little presents, or watch it slide into the mailbox. Your handwriting shows how strongly you feel about something. In an e-mail, that's lost too. In short, I'll be writing snail letters forever, even if I have to walk across the country and deliver them by hand.

-- Anonymous, June 14, 1999

I was browsing around Onelist and I found this list for lovers of stationery and snail mail...see I think of you guys! I attached the description of the list. If you want to subscribe, go to Onelist. I'm so nice....

SO, Pamie, when you gonna give us YOUR snail mail address so we can write YOU? *actually, that's not a bad idea...Squishy could get a PO Box as a birthday gift...Errrr-iiiic* MellieBee

PS - I just started a notify list too, cause I really am running out of online time to update my site. The site is http://members.tripod.com/MellieBee ( I named it Kaleidoscope, for those who care. Not that I've had a chance to play with the design.) and my notify list is "MellieBee". You can email me/the list at "MellieBee@onelist.com". Yes, that WAS a shameless plug. Now read the list description. ***********************************

addictedtosnailmail [English] [For People Over 21] [restricted] Similar lists This is a club where you will be able to meet others who enjoy snail mail pen palling and swapping. We will have a few swaps every month and Round Robins. We will trade things such as stickers, stationery, FB's etc. Please feel free to post an ad if you are wanting a snail mail pal or swapper. Ladies only please.

-- Anonymous, June 14, 1999


I wonder why it's "for ladies only."

Like the best handwritten letters aren't love letters.

I did give out my snail mail address last December when we all swapped Holiday cards. I had so much fun doing that I'm sure to do it again this year, so stay tuned, MelliBee. (and go update, for Pete's sake.)

-- Anonymous, June 14, 1999


I have to defend my honor... The reason I haven't been updating so often as I was is..my job changed, and I got a boss that actually gave me assignments (I'm not sure if that's a blessing or a curse yet). So I'm VERY busy at work. And since I don't have internet access from home, I can only update at work. And after being here for 9 or 10 hours, I WANNA GO HOME. So I do.

But, I just *finally* convinced my boss to give me a laptop, so I can do the text at home, and play with site design, and get everything all "just so", and then upload it. The uploading and checking the links is what takes so long. But that's why I did the list, so I could spit out the text without having to take forever to do the site if I'm busy. Or is that a total cop out?

Oh, thanks for letting me do a journal entry on your forum! hahahaha sorry... MellieBee (c'mon, subscribe to my list so I'm not sending it to myself)

-- Anonymous, June 14, 1999


I think it's always a pretty bad idea to post snail mail addresses on a place as public as the Internet....it's an open invitation for people to start sending you lacquered roadkill and severed toes ("Gimme five minutes, and I can get you a severed toe"!).

I never write letters and think snail mail will slowly dwindle out over the next 50 years. The cultural attention span seems to be getting too short to devote hours to writing a letter instead of shooting off a quick e-mail.

-- Anonymous, June 15, 1999


I have read the "snail mail" responses, and wasn't prompted to respond until a response that used the word "cultural" appeared.

Now, I am a sociologist (groan, groan, I know), and what I think we, meaning those of us who spend our lives with computers, forget that even now, there are people who have no access to a computer. For them, e-mail is something that is beyond their framework of reference. Those of us who malign "snail mail" do so because we don't use it. . .we have the internet, e-mail, the globe at the click of a button.

E-mail is still the mean of correspondence of the priveledged.

Personally, I like writing and receiving mail through Canada Post. And I recently read a compilation of selected letters of Margaret Laurence and Adele Wiseman.

Given how wonderful this book is, I think "snail mail" still has its place.

-- Anonymous, June 15, 1999


I thought more about this after my first response, and I was reminded of Frank Zappa's main complaint about CDs: the jewel boxes are too small for the fantastic cover art that people used to create for the huge sleeve of a record album. But don't worry, he concluded; people will eventually figure out how to best utilize the new format and before long there will be CD cover art that could never have happened on a record or tape.

I still think people will not give up snail mail for quite a long time, but I also think that the art of snail mail should not be mourned. There will be a transitional period, and then hopefully an art form will evolve within the electronic medium. Don't get me wrong: of course, there will always be people who send brief emails, as well, devoid of punctuation or content or value. But then, people still send postcards that say "We went here. See you soon," don't they?

-- Anonymous, June 28, 1999


The only real "love letter" I ever got was from a really non-demonstrative boy that I was dating. We'd been separated for two months, and I was a counselor at a camp with no computers, and he'd warned me that he wasn't a very good letter writer, so I wasn't expecting much. Then one day I got a letter. The inside only really said what he'd been up to - though I do think it said "I miss you" somewhere in there. But what was really impressive was that he had written "Missing you" in tiny little letters over and over again on the envelope with a pencil - he must have written it 200 times!

Like someone else said, it's the effort.

-- Anonymous, July 07, 1999


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