Update on Japanese Banking

greenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread

[found in my mailbox]

"Update on the Japanese Banking Crisis: According to our inside contacts the Japanese banking crisis shows no signs of ameliorating. If anything, it's getting worse. "Following last week's news that Origami Bank had folded, we are hearing that Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank plans to cut back some of its branches. Karaoke Bank is up for sale and is (you guessed it!) going for a song. "Meanwhile, shares in Kamikaze Bank have nose-dived and 500 back office staff at Karate Bank got the chop. Analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank and staff there fear they may get a raw deal."


"There's no place like home. There's no place like home. There's no place like home." --- Dorothy

-- Hallyx (Hallyx@aol.com), May 27, 1999


ROTFLMAO! - good one hallyx, where have you been? - don't be a stranger.

"Yakuza Bank has made an offer to the other major players that they cannot refuse. The new unit of currency will be fingers. Hirohito Bank will attempt divine influence during this crisis. Hara-Kiri Bank is determined to go one better than Yakuza Bank, offering eight fingers in one swell foop. The final bankruptcy may be a problem for Hara-Kiri bank as they will be all thumbs. Yakuza Bank have offered their services if this is the case..."

Over to you PNG :)

-- Andy (2000EOD@prodigy.net), May 27, 1999.

Why would you throw it over to PNG? He said Yeltsin would be out, like he had inside info. I don't trust PNG anymore.

-- FaFu (Annoyed@fff.com), May 27, 1999.

F'n nonsense if you ask me. Like much of what is on here these days. Some people have way too much time on their hands!

-- preparing (central@ohio.com), May 27, 1999.

FaFu: You're right. I was wrong and my source was wrong.

-- PNG (png@gol.com), May 27, 1999.

I wonder how many other sources on here are wrong.

Journalism at it's best.

-- FaFu (annoyed@fff.com), May 27, 1999.

The impeachment vote failed, but PNG did mention the ouster attempt before I heard about it on the evening news and Internet news sites.

-- Kevin (mixesmusic@worldnet.att.net), May 27, 1999.

What is Slack? If you have to ask, you can never know. You were born with it -- everyone is born with Original Slack -- but the Conspiracy has most of it now. They don't even know what it is, but that hasn't stopped Them from siphoning off what little you have left. (The stealing of Slack paradoxically becomes easier the less of it there is around.)

The Slack that can be described is not true Slack. By definition, it is indefinable. True Slack is "Something for Nothing." It is a kind of direct perception, unfettered by so-called "Common Sense."

Happiness is agony compared to Slack. Compared to Slack, NIRVANA is like having your eyes slowly gouged out with a carrot-peeler while recieving electroshock. Ten hours spent basking in the White Light of the Ultimate is like ants crawling up your nose and burrowing deep into your sinuses while you are dying of thirst in the desert, in relation to an eigth of a millisecond of Slack.

So you must ask yourself: Do you have Slack? Do you? How would you know?

Slack is different things to different people. For 3/4 of the world's population, Slack is a good meal. And if things keep getting worse, someday Slack for ANYBODY could be just one more breath of REAL AIR.

For you, at this point in the 20th Century, Slack is probably tied very closely to MONEY. This is because the Conspiracy has made it seem NATURAL that you have to "work" to "buy Slack." It's mindboggling how completely They have reversed the natural order of things, and how easily we all fell for it. Although SubGenii by definition are never Conspiracy dupes, most of them are Conspiracy SLAVES.

The reason They have been so successful these last 10,000 years is that -- ironically -- at any given time you actually have more Slack than you can possibly appreciate until it is taken away. You are HALF ASLEEP until that happens -- and after it does happen, you'll never again have a chance to be fully awake. It is, to use the proper expression, FUCKED.

By the same token however, Slack cannot be bottled or sold -- thus it is really FREE! You don't even need "Bob" to find it; you need only develop your "Slack Awareness." "Bob's" teachings can expedite this process, so that it snowballs until you get more and more Slack with less and less work. Or, rather, through real work, instead of wage drudgery. For Slack isn't exactly laziness, but a kind of active sloth. It is what "Bob" calls "surfing the Luck Plane" -- floating down The Path of Least Resistance -- EXPLOITING your MISTAKES. You "negate effort" by not trying, by not even doing ... by merely "letting." When you can finally let go and just "SEE" rather than "look," then and only then will you trulybe able to "PEE FREELY." Only then will you have achieved Achievingness without trying.

Once you do have Slack, you don't have to worry about sharing it because no matter how much you possess, ten times as much is radiated out. And this can mean INSTANT MONEY -- LUCK AT THE RACES -- AN AVALANCHE OF FRENZIED SEX -- ANYTHING YOU DESIRE!

"Bob" isn't so lucky because he's smart, but because he might as well be incredibly stupid by "normal" standards. If you could be a tenth as dumb as "Bob," your mistakes, blunders, follies and fobles would become as profitable as his. To truly know Nothing-- ah, if but we only could!! Human nature would improve a millionfold!

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-- ! (!@!.!), May 27, 1999.

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