Any advice for single older women facing Y2K alone?greenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread
I have searched the web for months, hoping to find anything written by/for/about an older woman living alone,but I find nothing. All the advice, essays and lists are based on the assumption that Americans only come in "families of four". Even the very few "women's sites" pointed out to us are geared to families. What about us, whose families are grown and far away (or never came to pass)? Are we non-entities? Are we all assumed to lump into the "elderly" category? Millions of us do not. If it was common for us to live with relatives, which it is not these days, perhaps we would be. It is common for us to live in cities, as I do.
Speaking for myself, I cannot afford to sell my home and get out and leave the job that keeps me alive. If I lived in New York or L.A. (no offense meant to anyone) I would, at all cost, but my city is medium-sized and I make my own decisions. I am stock-piling and preparing the best I can. Here I am and here I intend to stay. I am more than a tank of gas away from my nearest grown child and do not intend trying to navigate a two-state parking lot if it comes down as bad as I think it will; no bugging out after the fact. My situation and plans are not unique. A lot of us are little households of one plus a cat. Is there any advice out there for us?
-- Scat (email@example.com), May 23, 1999
Best to you...
-- Dennis (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
Yes Scat - check out y2kaos or y2kchaos, it's a Christian site written by a pastor in downtown LA I believe - haven't been there for a while but there were some excellent scenarios for self protection staying in inner cities and suburbs.
-- Andy (2000EOD@prodigy.net), May 23, 1999.
I was going to answer you on another forum and then saw this.
Community is everything. If you have neighbors, you have to make a choice. ( thats assumeing you think there maybe troubles )
1. you can prepare to shoot them. 2. You can prepare to feed them, and water them.
Rice and beans are cheap and if you vac pak them now, and store them in quantity, well, you get the idea. Water is also cheap right now.
If Y2k is a bump in the road, donate the rice and beans to your local charity, they'll love to have them, it's tax deductable.
Get a wind up radio w/ sw and a light ( I hear sears has one )
No one lives in a vacume, no matter how far out in the sticks they live. Zog allways say's, " water, food, shelter, heat ". I'd like to add one. Community.
In case your reading this instead of answering all the heavy traffic on De Bunker.
Do you tell the people that you talk to about Y2k your own preps while you tell them it is all hype, people just selling stuff, Fema and the red cross say it's just like a storm, prep for 3 days? Imagine their dismay if it aint.
Storeing running shoes?
-- CT (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
There are several choices: stay alone and keep a very low profile (which may be easier because you are alone); load up the car with your supplies and go visit the kids prior to the roll over; or if you have any friends that are also alone, band together. My single sister may stay with us through the rollover. My husband and I will be together but apart from the grown children at the roll over -- we have no illusions about this being easy. That's why it's important to be prepared way before December. You will not catch me out shopping for anything (even food) in December. Low profile. Hopefully you have the option to take a week off at the end of the year. My best wishes to you,
-- Shelia (Shelia@active-stream.com), May 23, 1999.
Another option...band together with single friends who live somewhat nearby. It always helps to have a few who can help you out when you need it, and who you are willing to help in exchange. Also, you can split large quantities, share resources, etc.
-- Mad Monk (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
I'll provide a more complete reply in a future WRP but essentially, you have an underlying assumption that you are at a disadvantage.
This is not the case. There is a lot that you can do. Don't depend upon websites and such for exact guidance. Read, learn, then make your own way.
-- cory (kiyoinc@ibm.XOUT.net), May 23, 1999.
Scat, I will write to you privately because I think I can help. I may as well be a single woman because even though I'm married, I've taken on the job of preparing and organizing for Y2K. My son is several tanks of gas away! Our best friend, The Hungarian, is older and lives alone, except for a number of cats. We're doing just fine, especially on limited means.
First order of business, go to garage, yard and estate sales. I've found things like a camping stove, appropriate, small barbecue grills, sturdy ice chests (good for storing things like beans, coffee, whatever), manual coffee-grinder, whole grocery bag full of candles, oil lamps, fondue set (food for heating water with Sterno underneath), extra blankets, quilts, iron pots for open flame cooking, tons of stuff. All for very low prices.
If you don't own a firearm, now is the time to think about it. First, go to a gunshop, see if you can sign up for NRA classes.
Look at the Food archive here for all kinds of information on stocking up.
Must rush, will write to you later today.
-- Old Git (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
Scat--Identifying someone within your circle (and it may be you) who has the best set-up for y2k will require communication with friends and neighbors. My single sister-in-law, age 48, is an executive at a telecommunications company and a GI. She approached us early on and asked if she could make a financial contribution to our preparedness efforts, and consider it her insurance policy in case the stuff hits. We were going to invite her for the rollover anyway, along with her mother and my mother, but I admired her foresight in thinking the thing through and proposing her plan to us. We live on a few acres outside of city, which definitely presents her with a better alternative to her home in town. Glad you posted the question; I, too, read the sites for women and have not seen this addressed sufficiently. Thanks!
-- katy raymond (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
spend $200 and buy an inexpensive shotgun and #4 buckshot
-- zoobie (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
Get to know members at your local senior center and join an area gardening club. Push yourself to make friends with the neighbors, too. Create your own local "family."
Was thumbing through this book at the store a while ago... looked quite good!
How to Survive Y2K Chaos in the City : A Preparedness and Self- Reliance Handbook
by Ken Eirich, Nancy Eirich
Best of luck! Lots of good suggestions made above.
(BTW, Old Git can offer you a wealth of wisdom!)
-- Diane J. Squire (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
Scat, I understand your problem. I'm surprised that more sites haven't addressed the single person problem. And sometimes ones neighbors are not people you really want to get involved with.
My situation is similar to Old Git's. My only son is many gas tanks away, and I wouldn't want to go there anyway. But as Git says, do what you can where you are. Garage sales are great. I found my All-American canner, in mint condition, at a yard sale for $15.00. And it's amazing what good candles, clothes, lamps and other household items you find that people no longer want.
We're retired, and moving isn't an option, although this is as good a place to be as any. (Lots of water) Sadly, the one person nearby that we really liked, about our age, that we knew would understand and be willing to set up a neighborhood watch of sorts, was killed a month ago. Just do the best you can, and keep a low profile, is about the best anyone can do. Good luck.
-- gilda (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
My single daughter lives in downtown L.A. and even though she is a grown woman, I have told her that I insist that she packs up anything in her home that she feels she can not live without and then come to our rural home before Christmas and plan on staying through New Year's just to see what happens. I told her she can always return home if there are no problems. I made the same offer to a single older neighbor of hers who thinks I am a nut case for worrying about Y2K and says she won't come. I guess all of us have our opinion as to who the nut case is. Anyway, if you feel uneasy about staying alone, why don't you pack up your gear and go to one of your children's homes for an extended holiday visit. If we have problems, I would prefer to be with family. Oh, and by the way, both my daughter and her neighbor have one cat each, and I told them I would prepare for their animals as well. Guess my daughter's coming, as she gave me instructions on what kind of cat food to store.
-- Sharon L (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
I was amazed at all the good responses and do thank all of you. Knew you were a good bunch; I've been lurking awhile. Sheila, I thought of going to visit my daughter for Xmas & staying but afraid I won't be able to come home or have a home to come to, and I can't face that. May reconsider in Dec. Won't have any time off my job but could get "sick". Don't think I'll have a job after 1-1-00 anyway.
Am keeping a very low profile - as I drag propane heater & trunkloads of supplies into the house hen I hope I'm not being observed. (grin) I've done well on my own list that makes sense for me. Garage sales are a good idea - or flea markets! I'm about spent out. I do have a weapon I know how to use & it doesn't spray pepper; it's for gangs (yes I know how ill-advised that sounds) not neighbors. Thank you too, Old Git. I've never been a "community" person, but have decided I need to be now. I'm not quite a senior but senior center is a good idea I hadn't thought of - I like being with people in my own generation.
I'm on a corner, high visibility, don't like it, but folks next door have 2 toddlers so I'm storing extra dry milk & kid's stuff. Am concerned about reinforcing my old house in ways I'm physically able to do - tried to discuss this with my sister, also a single in a bigger city too far away, but she thinks I'm nuts. New storm doors with iron grillwork is as far as I've gotten & don't have them yet. No, I'm not talking to anyone that one question or comment gets no response from & so far that's everybody.
Thanks for the sites, all - I've been to Chaos, got some of my best info there. CORY: I'm really looking forward to your future WRP, have been following them. Hurry. I don't believe in this "lull"
Diane, I'm going to find that book! Thanks to all of you.
-- Scat (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
Used to do alot of work with landscapers in the past.
Plant a row of hedges or tall, fast growing, low-water use shrubs (that don't need trimming) to "down-play" that high visibility corner.
Results in better, protective, feng shui.
-- Diane J. Squire (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
Three words: VERY LARGE DOG
Best to you,
-- Roland (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
Scat, my first thought when I read your post was, "Make a list of all the reasons why you can't move. Wasn't that fun? Now, go ahead and move anyway!". My apologies, but the litany of reasons people give for not moving sound too much like the ones the German Jews gave for not leaving Germany in ~1932; they may matter to the people involved, but are basically irrelevant. Whether or not they DO relocate to a rural area (where I understand you do not yet live) is what is relevant. Instead, how about reading Sorokin's books, and maybe the "An Introduction", "Relationships" (which my wife wrote 1/2 of), and the two "Warning..." articles on my (just updated) website? Yours in preparation, MinnesotaSmith
www.y2ksafeminnesota.com OR http://y2ksafeminnesota.hypermart.net
-- MinnesotaSmith (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
General comment on " Final Day " (Dec.31st.) Have invited (ordered) all three children ( and husbands/wive ) to be at my home for " Y2K Party " , that will start at 12:30 P.M. , where we will eat , drink (soft) and be merry , AS WE LISTEN TO ASIAN/EUROPEAN NEWS OF Y2K PROBLEMS. If there are problems as I fear , they will go home BEFORE there are drunks on the road , gather food , clothes , etc. and return in a day or so . If nothing happens, they leave about 8-9 pm for their prearrange New Years Eve parties ... no loss ... a " good time was had by all " family gathering ! Eagle ... watching ; circling the nest .
-- Hal Walker (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
I recognise that you are right and history bears you out. But "reasons" for not moving can be anything from silly to complicated - mine are neither, just that I can't. Reasons for "can't" might make no sense to you or others, but when a person truly believes their reasons, they won't be budged. Yes, maybe ill advised, but true.
My take on y2k is severe, but I think not quite as severe as yours. Your "Very Long" post a few days ago was really helpful to me and some of the best advice I've seen, as I told you on the thread. I don't go along with all of it but I do respect what you have to say. I will go back to your site because I find it helpful. But as I said before, here I hunker down and stay. That's why I need advice.
-- Scat (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 23, 1999.
Consider the post here:
http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id=000K2S This has some GOOD strategizing, but is long and somewhat DARK in flavor. Chuck
-- Chuck, a night driver (email@example.com), May 23, 1999.
Learn first aid and frontier doctoring. Especially mid-wifery. You will then always be in demand.
Re mid-wifery -- besides the techniques, learn one of the most important tenets (responsiblities). That is the "midwife's option", which is: As the fetus is birthed, you take a good look, and make sure that it does not breath if there is any obvious deformity whatsoever.
You don't hear about that much anymore, and when you do hear about it, it is with condemnation. The "heroic" measures of this soft and pampered society to keep defective and deformed infants living is stupid. In a society where your midwife services would be required, allowing such infants to survive is irresponsible and unaffordable.
-- A (A@AisA.com), May 24, 1999.
Scat- just keep a low profile and be sure you can leave if you need to- you know "bug out bag" and all of that. In some ways, your preps are simpler- less mouths to feed. So- you can store extras for the neighbors if need be and then "swap" for help and assistance. A large dog would be good though, as long as you like dogs.
By the way "A"- some kids look just fine at birth but are still "defective"- mine was gorgeous and is still 100% brain damaged. Would you suggest we kill them off after the fact when we discover they ain't perfect??
-- anita (firstname.lastname@example.org), May 24, 1999.
Anita: People used to abandon them. Sorry, reality exists. A is A. People prior to the last few hunddred years didn't expect the state (government) -- taxpayers -- to subsidize care of such. Like I said, this is a soft and pampered society. Things could change.
-- A (A@AisA.com), May 25, 1999.
I think what makes America such an awesomely powerful country is the strength of our spirit. It is there always, sometimes a little further from the surface than others, but always there. It is at precisely at the time we feel cornered , we come out of our protective shells, and spring forth from that spirit.
It is something much deeper than knowledge, or training, or even belief. It is the truth that good is stronger than evil. We are as much a part of it as it of us. There are those that have never seen the power of prayer, but I have. It is not explained by any bell curve, or stastic of probability, or position of superiority. It is given to us, this power. We have been reminded of it throughout the last two milliniea, from the stories about Gods people. Noah at Arrorat, Moses in Egypt, David and Golaith, Joshaua at Jerico, eshack, meshack, abednago in the furnace in Babaylon, Jesus at Gethsmone, Paul and the Apostles in prison, to the guy in the white hat in the movies, to the person that gently and quietly sends another spirit home. Its is always there.
Ask yourself this, if *you* turn off the light switch right now and the light quits burning, does this mean there is no more power? no,the power is waiting just behind that switch, waiting for the chance to again be used. The *energy* behind that switch can neither be created or destroyed by man. Neither can the energy behind prayer be created or destroyed by man. It may be shut out, or lost in the noise of self, but not created or destroyed.
Our goal then is to turn on the switch. Sometimes it takes being cornered, to get us there. Look around you. Take a chance, be a little bold if need be. Raise up a conversation with a kindred spirit. They are all around us you know. When you see it, and you will, let your spirit come to the surface, and interact with it. It may be someone or even something, that you just know is good.
We just are either too afraid, or too busy, or too self indulged to make those contacts. Now, many of us are too afraid not to.
I had a chance to talk to our new neighbors again today. They just moved here a short time ago from the Ukraine. They speak little English, and I speak no Ukraine, but you know, somehow we manage to communicate. They were broken into last month, and I decided to take a chance at being rejected and took them some window and door stops I had made. I hoped it might make her feel a little less vunerable. I want no recognition for this, it was not important then, nor is it now. But you know what, today she brought us some homemade bread rolls. Pretty cool.
Now I have to tell you the most peculiar thing. Today she asked me if I was worried about Year 2000 millineium. She had her little electronic translator with her today. I swear it happened so. I do not go around preaching about it to anyone since my first few encounters. But some how we were standing there talking about preparing. I took her to see the solar dehydrator at work (drying bannanas today), and explained, some things she had little to worry about, like water (minor problem here) alternate heating (wood, also available in substantial quanities here) but they should consider storing some food to tide them over for a while. (She was very nervous about not being able to go to the store and get bread) And about any prescriptions they depended on. Things like that. Again a little less vulnerable.
It kept going through my mind, here are folks that survived Cherynobol, then being broken into, who knows what else, and now this. Like I said I didn't bring it up. So I guess I know the two that I will be helping, other than family (all DGI). I kinda already guessed it would be them , but you never know. Geez, I hope the their kids and grand kids GI. About the last thing she said to us, before going back home "God Bless You" Makes me want to cry right here.
-- unspun@lright (email@example.com), May 25, 1999.