My stepdaughter is married to a flake! They have no money to prepare for Y2K!

greenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread

I have to use this forum to vent of some of my Y2K family frustrations. Well, here it goes. Does anyone else have this problem?

Yes, I have a serious family problem! My wife's daughter is married to a flake, who cannot hold on to a job longer then 3 weeks. He has a CDL license to drive big trucks and make good money, but refuses to do so. A couple of years ago they were in a desperate situation and ask to live with us for a month, so they could get on their feet. The month stretched into 6 months (it was a nightmare!) and then they got mad at us and left without a thank you. I have loaned them over $3000 over the years to cover their desperate situations, never got one penny back. I even gave my stepdaughter the money last year to file for divorce. Stupid her, she took him back just before it was final, because he had no place to go. They are barely making it and have no extra money to prepare for Y2K. If I want to prevent them from moving back into our home, I'm forced to prepare for them and buy a year supply of food for them. Lucky enough, I do have the means to do that, so we have been filling one of our empty bedrooms with supplies for them, and will give it to them for Christmas. If we give it to them now, then they will have no incentive to do any preparing at all for themselves. I'm willing to bet that there are several million similar situations in this country. I told them 6 months ago to start preparing, and so far they have not had the money to do so, and probably never will. I do not ever want them to move back in with us, so I have to cover their ass for Y2K. And life goes on......

-- freddie (freddie@thefreeloader.com), April 22, 1999

Answers

Scroll down below and you will see a picture of the car they are driving! Sad, sad, sad situation! Some people just don't have any drive to get ahead in life! I just could not live that way.

-- freddie (frdddie@thefreeloader.com), April 22, 1999.

harden your heart and let them die....or practice compassion for them and be happy there is one in your family that has eyes to see y2k...virtous acts performed in name only have no virtue...quit being a hypocrite,help them because you have the means and you want to or let them die...your condescending charity will taste like ash in their mouths...quit playing the hypocrite and help them or cut them off and let them live or die by their own hands,this kind of superior whinning will end in 8 months and we'd all do better with out it now

-- ZOOBIE (ZOOB@AOL.COM), April 22, 1999.

Freddie,

You are an asshole. Are you divorced? If so, doesn't sound like you life has been a bed of roses either. Quit whining and let them live their lives. This is no place for this garbage.

-- CashQueen (RichLady@$$$.com), April 22, 1999.


Hey Zoobe, the guy is a flake and a lazy asshole! I have no compassion for a guy who refuses to be responsible and provide for his family! I'm just helping them to keep them out of our house! It's as simple as that. Don't come to me with that religious crap of compassion! The Lord helps those who help themselves! All the guy lives for is handouts! We get calls every week from bill collectors looking for them and that's why they keep on moving from apartment to apartment! About the pictures below, they keep on changing, so their car picture is gone!

-- freddie (freddie@thefreeloader.com), April 22, 1999.

Looks like Cash Queeen is a real BITCH!!! Unbelievable, the kind of people that visit this Forum!! I guess, they are all over this world! Can't get away from them, no matter how hard we try!

-- freddie (freddie@thefreeloader.com), April 22, 1999.


Freddie,

I must admit to being a bit cynical about you (of the stock market bragging) but it sounds like you need to prepare for your stepdaughter to live with you. If you give her the prep stuff at X- mas they will just waste/trade it and will be back on your doorstep quickly. Perhaps lazy husband will straighten up and fly right. Good Luck.

-- Kristi (securx@Succeed.Net), April 22, 1999.


You're going to either allow them to continue to take advantage of you or cut them off next time they try to impose upon you. Those are your choices. As for their choices, they are adults. Your step daughter is an adult(by law anyway). She is chosing her path and unless she is saddled with child care, she can work too. Why would you continue to interfere with their tasting the fruit of their own ineptitude and poor choices especially during times when the situation can be salvaged? Are there minor children to consider? What is your wife saying? I personally would give them fair warning and then would launch them upon the universe. No more hand outs, no more places to live etc. Otherwise how are they ever expected to grow beyond this pathetic situation? FWIW.

-- Ramp Rat (Aviation_R_us@noname.nocity), April 22, 1999.

then let them die.don't help people in order to elevate yourself and humiliate others,your brand of compassion just makes you feel superior...get off the power trip...it's their lives,let them live it

-- Zoobie (zoob@aol.com), April 22, 1999.

Get him a job working for Der Slickmeister. He will either be in jail in 8 months, or dead. Problem solved.

NEXT ?

-- SCOTTY (BLehman202@aol.com), April 22, 1999.


What, who and where is Der Slickmeister? I too have a flakie son in law that I would love to send on his way!

-- smitty (smitty@sandiego.com), April 22, 1999.


der Slickmeister is Clinton,some sheeple think we have a two party system and that Clinton is anything but a figurehead,oh,well,people love their scapegoats,anything to avoid personal responsibility

-- zoobie (zoob@aol.com), April 22, 1999.

Hey Freddie,

It's called Tough Love.

You need to realize that you have enabled them to continue being lazy slobs and slackers. Why the hell would you keep loaning them bucks knowing what a piece of flakey shit your son-in-law is.

DO NOT PREPARE FOR THEM. It's time they learned about life....the hard way. Did your folks hold your hand through life until now??

Time for them to grow up. Time for you to teach them to grow up. It is time as a loving parent, for you to harden your heart to their whinning, snuff your worry about how they'll handle Y2K and be a man. Tell them they're on their own. Don't come a knockin' for handouts or help.

Stop being an enabler. If you continue to serve their sloth, they will one day turn on you if you don't continue to provide for them, parent or no.

Take care of yourself and wife. Realize that you will be giving them the greatest gift a parent can provide: self-reliance.

If you decide to assist them post Y2K, make your rules clear: No work, no eat. It's biblical, and it's fair.

Stop your pattern of enabling and demand effort with results.

Anything less gives them more reason to sponge off you.

--Dr. Laura INVAR

-- INVAR (gundark@sw.net), April 22, 1999.


Agree with Laura. I mean INVAR. INVAR, ARE you really Dr. Laura in disguise? I have never considered that possibility ......

-- BigDog (BigDog@duffer.com), April 22, 1999.

I see this sort of thing all the time, able-bodied adult kids sponging off their parents. You know why they do it? Because the parents allow it. Tell them no more handouts, no more free room and board, and you expect them to start paying back the money they owe you, including the divorce money. Pity you didn't make them sign a Promissory Note. If they take off in a huff, good riddance.

-- Mean Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), April 22, 1999.

We have discussed a similar situation in that we have warned our families and have not had any help from them. Either they're DGI's or they kinda get it but new furniture, cars and beer are more important.

Our final decision has been that anybody who has not started to help us either by labor or money by July will not be welcome (to live) on our property after 1/1/00. Because we expect to have intensive gardens and be able to feed an army, we will give them food when they come for it and will not let them starve but they will be chopping firewood or something in exchange and will take it home with them. They are also welcome to haul water home with them. The leeches are not moving in but we do have compassion for the innocent children.

-- y2klady (dgi's @dontget.it), April 22, 1999.



Bite me Freddie, you asshole!!

-- CashQueen (RichLady@$$$.com), April 22, 1999.

I suppose your son-in-law is a Mormon, right Freddie?

-- I like Mormons (seen@it.before), April 22, 1999.

Wow, Cashqueen, you know how to do annoying web tricks! Go diddle yourself, you baggy old whore...

-- Peevish Old Man (ihate@sluts.com), April 22, 1999.

EXCUSE ME?????

-- winna (??@??.com), April 22, 1999.

Freddie, I see people like them everyday. They won't work because they don't have to. Daddy will take care of them. They never become responsible, contributing members of society. They bum off you till your're gone and then suckle on the government tit. Just like CashQueen. Do them and yourself a favor...take INVAR'S advice.

-- Boss (Employees@business.com), April 22, 1999.

Peevish Old Man

Here is your Wife

-- CashQueen (RichLady@$$$.com), April 22, 1999.


Oops here she is. I mistaked her for a dog..



-- CashQueen (RichLady@$$$.com), April 22, 1999.


Freddy, you have put me in a terrible spot. I find that I agree with INVAR! This is bad. So therefore I think I'll agree with Old Git instead. Like her, I've seen this happen in lots of families. If you continue to bail them out of jams and support them, you'll get to do it forever. Of course when you're gone, they'll be helpless. It called co-dependency. What are you getting from it?

Cash queen, you were kind of tacky to Freddie, but I sure admire that traveling message. I wish I could do that. Too dumb!!

-- gilda (jess@listbot.com), April 22, 1999.


oh, it's easy... you should try it.

-- Max Dixon (mcdixon@konnections.com), April 22, 1999.

Gilda, it's easy all you have to do is....

Freddie is an asshole!!

-- CashQueen (RichLady@$$$.com), April 22, 1999.
Freddie,

I agree, hard as it is ( and I imagine your wife will fight you on this as well) you have to make them do for themselves. If you feel you want to have food for them after 1/1/2000, then that is not unreasonable. But make them work for it. I would not give them the food for Christmas, in fact I would not let them know that it was there for them at all. But you need to start being firm now. Do not aid them with anything else. They will learn to make their own way. They will not have a choice. And if you are worried about your step- daughter, don't be. If her husband does not provide, and she can not sponge off of you, she will soon grow tired of it and move on. The advice you have been given is sound. Regardless of your good intentions, you are enabling their behaviour.

-- (stern@doit.yourself), April 22, 1999.


Thanks, you guys, for all your good advise. I would let my wife read it, but decided against it because of Cash Queens ignorant ratings and ravings. Obviously she's a real BITCH! Sooner or later her husband will realize that and throw her out in the street! The sooner, the better!

That reminds me.....I had a bitch for an ex-wife and left her after 25 years of marriage. 16 years ago we divorced and my 2 youngest children were 4 and 6 years old. She never even once gave me visitation! Not even to take them for icecream! They are over 20 years old and have been brainwashed and do not want a father. Yes, my ex is a real bitch like Cash Queen!

My oldest son bought a home 4 houses from me and my ex had a fit! I wished I could have seen her face when she found out!

By the way, the flake is NOT a Mormon! I live in Mormon country and I have never seen a Mormon flake! In fact there is no such thing! Thanks again for the good advise and will use it as a guide!

-- freddie (freddie@thefreeloader.com), April 23, 1999.


Freddie, I am in a similar situation. My daughter is living with a boyfriend who drinks. I told her that she could come here for new years as we have 2 of her daughters living with us and a third will be visiting for Christmas vacation, but she must leave boyfriend behind. I am planning supplies for my Hubby and I, our 3 grandaughters, our son and daughter. That's all. You might want to do the same.

-- Homeschooling Grandma (Donna@glennet.com), April 23, 1999.

Obviously the BITCH Cash Queen is real good at the computer by screwing up this Y2K website! We live in a sad world if the BITCHES are able to take over the computers! CASH QUEEN, EVERYBODY HERE KNOWS YOU'RE A BITCH! Go back to the DOGPOUND!

-- freddie (freddie@thefreeloader.com), April 23, 1999.

Wow! What a mess! I'll try to help.

-- Gayla Dunbar (privacy@please.com), April 23, 1999.


Moderation questions? read the FAQ