going to hell

greenspun.com : LUSENET : Squishy : One Thread

I was just commenting that I think the middle prisoner of war is cute. I was discussing with someone through e-mail how I'm definately going to hell for that one.

Just about every night we have a show someone does a sketch or tells a joke that makes us all convinced that we are going to hell.

What makes you sure you're going there?

What makes you sure I'm going there?

come on, you know you want to share the worst parts of you.

-- Anonymous, April 05, 1999

Answers

Well, maybe that soldier you like is going to have a 7.62mm round put through his face this week for being lippy with his captors, but I still don't understand why that makes you a candidate for eternal damnation.

Its not as if there won't be more U.S prisoners taken ... it shouldn't be so easy to ambush convoys ... where was their security? why wasn't there a gun HMMV with a 50 cal following the convoy? and if there was or if elvis boy was armed, why the fuck didn't they shoot?

So while you worry about whether or not you have enough milk to get through the week, Spc. Elvis might be worrying about whether or not he should make a grab for his guard's AK47 while he's taking a piss so he can have some means of getting the fuck out of there.

It's no big deal. No hell for you. If there is a hell, then yes I am going there. If there is a heaven, I don't know if I'd want to go there either, cuz if its just a big get together where all the secrets of the universe are revealed, if all the answers are just in the back of the book, then I'd sooner go on not knowing.

-- Anonymous, April 05, 1999


Don't worry, Pamie, I have information which will enable you to once again rest easy. You won't be going to hell, and neither will anyone else: there is no hell. Whoever told you there was a hell lied to you.

-- Anonymous, April 05, 1999

Move over, I think he's cute as well. You just might go to hell and if you do, I will welcome you with open arms. We can have lunch - maybe do some Tae-Bo and kick it with the Big D for a while.

-- Anonymous, April 05, 1999

When the doors of Hell open up to snatch me (as I'm sure they will), I'll say, to quote Homer J. Simpson:

"Mmmmm....barbeque...."

You think looking at the POW is bad! Everytime I see Christina Ricci, I have to keep telling myself that she's, like, not legal. THAT'S sending me straight to hell!!!

-- Anonymous, April 06, 1999


Dunno if I'd trust this davevan guy's answer. Read his journal. Those two brats sound a lot like hell. We think he's in denial.

-- Anonymous, April 06, 1999


The simple observation that someone is a hottie is no cause for someone to go to hell. I think the POW's a babe, too, and while it's a very sad thing that his beautiful (and potentially useful) parts could soon be blown to bits, ponder this: he's a MAN.

What does that mean? Well, do you think he's spending his day sitting in the little hellhole they've put him in smelling the foul odors of his fellow men and their filth and thinking, "When will they kill us?" No. He's probably, as seems the habit of most men I've known, thinking "When will they kill us? I'll never have sex again. God, the breasts on that girl back in highschool. And that chick who crawled all over me when I told her I was leaving for war. God, was that ever fucking incredible. I wonder if she has cute friends. Oh, yeah. I wonder when they're going to kill us."

I'd really like to think otherwise of him, but chances are he's not some gallant war hero to the tune of The Officer and the Gentleman. Chances are, he's just another one of our MTV-attention-spanned compatriots, who hooted at football games, grabbed random asses in fits of drunkenness, vomited in urinals, shot cats in his backyard with bb guns, and just plain was a human of our generation. Maybe he's a father already. does anyone know?

-- Anonymous, April 06, 1999


>The simple observation that someone is a hottie >is no cause for someone to go to hell.

Unless of course the person doing the observing is a MAN, right?

>it's a very sad thing that his beautiful (and potentially >useful) parts could soon be blown to bits

Again, if a man said this about a woman in the same situation what would you say about him?

What exactly is your point? Since he's probably only thinking about sex anyway go ahead and shoot him? No loss unless he's the kind of guy like in The Officer and the Gentleman?

How unfortunate for this poor guy that he doesn't live up to your Hollywood manufactured ideal male.

Perhaps he's trying to look at the bright side of his fate... if he is a married father he's probably thinking at least if he's killed he won't have to go back to the conniving, nagging, money grabbing, empty headed bitch who only pretended to like sex until the day they were married.

-- Anonymous, April 06, 1999


We all say it, men and women alike. That's the point. It's easy to romanticize someone when we are given such limited character information. Harder, perhaps, to recognize that that individual is far more like those around us than we might otherwise imagine. IMHO, lust is no crime, but unfortunately I think such things are usually more contigent upon not knowing than knowing.

-- Anonymous, April 07, 1999

Moderation questions? read the FAQ