Us Brits, (excluding me) have picked up this irritating habit of saying every other word...y'know, has this spread across the pond or did it in fact emanate from your side, who is to blame???? it is becoming an epidemic y'know. It is driving me round the twist... y'know.

-- Sir Rick (jcconey@figroup.co.uk), February 28, 1999

Answers

"Is sloppiness in speech caused by ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care."

-- William Safire

-- Kevin (mixesmusic@worldnet.att.net), February 28, 1999.

Richard a' Dale,

Well, ya all, whose to say where any of it originated, don'cha know?

BTW, since you are on that side of the pond, care to give us some input on this story?

OH S**T!! - BRITAIN'S MILITARY SATTELITE - HELD BY HACKERS!!

http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000YIG

Y'know, anything?

Thanks,

Diane

-- Diane J. Squire (sacredspaces@yahoo.com), February 28, 1999.

Came from the US, I first noticed it here about 1965.

-- well,y'know (uh@umm.uhhhh), February 28, 1999.

It ain't us - maybe it's dem Canadianainain's, eh?

-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (cook.R@csaatl.com), February 28, 1999.

Get ready, Sir Richard, the next monster swimming through the pond is "knowoddamsayn?" (trans. "Do you know what I am saying?"). Which is not to be confused with the Yorkshire, "Oowashiwi?" (trans. "Who was she with?"), to which the usual response is, "Shiwohwee'ersen," (trans. "She was with herself").

-- Unaccented Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), February 28, 1999.

RIChARD OF The rouNdtREE!!!!! DO The MIndleSS FOOLs iN BRitAIN "AXE" QUeSTIONs?????? DO theSE JACkALs of Y'knoW ALsO "AXED You thIS HERE quesTiON"?????? HAs thIS WAve of fOoLISHNESS inVaDED YOur faIR SHoRES???? inFidELS!!!!! SUrRounDed bY INFIdELS IS DIeTER!!!!!

FIgHT THese JACkASSEs!!!!! FIgHT THEm on THe beACHes, THe ciTIEs, AND thE HILLs!!!!!! BEwARE SIR!!!!! BEwARE I saY!!!! IDIOts ABOunD!!!!

-- Dieter (questions@toask.com), February 28, 1999.

DIeteR SwEAt Heart! TheSE GoOD PeoPle arE GettiNG sO TireD Of youR conTinuAL raMbLINg On And On AnD on! If yOU don"T StoP IT, I WiLL thrOW a BriCK throuGH your DAmmED ComPUtER ScreeN!!! Do YoU HEaR ME??!!? One MOrE TiME AnD I"m GOinG tO LeT you HaVE iT AnD thrOW yoU OUt oF thE HouSE!!! I HaVE Had It WIth YoU!!!!

-- Mrs.Dieter (answers@toask.com), February 28, 1999.

Dieter, we Brits love your postings. However, for those who aren't quite so familiar with American idiom, here's a Cockney translation of your remarks from the Dialectizer.

RIChARD OF The chuffin' rouNdtREE! Right!!! Right!! Honest guv!! Honest guv! DO The bleedin' MIndleSS FOOLs iN BRitAIN "AXE" QUeSTIONs?????, isit?DO theSE JACkALs of Y'knoW ALsO "AXED Yer fIS 'ERE quesTiON"?????, isit?HAs fIS WAve of fOoLISHNESS inVaDED YUs faIR SHoRES???, eh? inFidELS! Honest guv!! Right!! Struth!! Struth!! Honest guv! SUrRounDed bY INFIdELS IS DIeTER! Oi!! Blimey!! Oi!! Right!! FIgHT THese JACkASSEs! Oi!! Oi!! Struth!!! Honest guv! FIgHT THEm on THe beACHes, THe ciTIEs, right, AND fE 'ILLs! Honest guv!! Right!!! Honest guv!! Blimey!! Blimey! BEwARE SIR!! Struth!! Blimey!! Oi!! Blimey! BEwARE I saY! Right!! Honest guv!! Honest guv!! IDIOts ABOunD! Honest guv!! Oi!!! Struth!

-- Elocuted Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), February 28, 1999.

MRS. diETER!!!!! HOw DEEp IS'NT YouR LOVE???? AFteR ALL THAT DIetER HAS DONE FoR You!!!!! PAinED ANd huRT IS DIEtER, IS HE Not?????? DIetER HAS no noSE, FROm aLL OF the griNDING!!!!! ALL OF dieTERS elbOw grEAse HAS BeeN USED!!!!! ALL FOR YoU!!!! HAVE You not eNJOYeD THE BON-BoNS???? The hoUrs of endLess lOvinG????? THe miNT ON Your piLLow????? CRYinG IS DIETER NOW!!!!!

-- Dieter (questions@toask.com), February 28, 1999.

Oh! Mine LieBschen DieTer! ThE BoN BoNS wERE OlD aNd STaLe aND the MInts WeRE HarD as A ROcK aND It BroKeMy TOOth!@!&$*()#!@ !OUCH!! HeLL, It HuRT LiKe HeLL!! NoW I HaveTo Go To ThE DaMmED DeNtISt! You BeTEr GRinD SomE MORe OFF YOUR DAmmED NOSe tO PaY tHE DenTIS! ToM
-- Mrs. Dieter (answers@toask.com), February 28, 1999.

Ps. DiETEr, I WARnED You TO STop BotherING The FolKs On THE INTeRNet!!! WhEn You ARe OFf TO WORk TOMorroW, I Will Do AS I ProMIsed AnD THRoW A BRiCK THrOUgh YoUR DAMMed ComPutER and THeN I"M MOViNG OUT AND GOIngTo MOthERS, You HeaR!!!??? AnD I"M NEVER EVer COmING BACk!!! YOU HEAR !!! "HUsh NOW" ANd SToP Your DAmmED CRYinG!!!

-- Mrs.Dieter (answers@toask.com), February 28, 1999.

Dieter and Mrs. Dieter - please EAT something and get a life!

-- Plenty Fed Up (shutup@don'task.com), March 01, 1999.

Us'n Canuckians don't say ya know, we say "eh", eh?

-- Tricia the Canuck (jayles@telusplanet.net), March 01, 1999.

Y'know, like, this thread is, like, wierd eh...knowhaddamean?

-- Chris (catsy@pond.com), March 01, 1999.

If you want weird, how about; It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide!

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 01, 1999.

Oh I dunno, Hardliner. If you tipped your trouble and strife down the apples and pears after she conked you on your loaf, then you might as well give it a go.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 01, 1999.

You're right! It would beat going to jail, if it worked!

How about; Each leech, vomiting in solution, produced red edibles, since leeches eat yams!??

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 01, 1999.

Hardliner, you're slipping! Did you mean, "Better van doin' a stretch in stir, if it turns out to be a doddle"?

Cripes, you got me with the leeches thingie, though. Is it an elocution exercise? Did you know that instead of practicing English with, "My aunt's pen is on my uncle's desk," the French say, "A cat is not an elephant"?

Well, it's all san fairy anne in the end, innit? (San fairy anne - from the French "cela ne fait rien" which, roughly translated, means it don't mean no never mind.)

You an' me're gonna 'ave to 'ave a knees-up dahn the Dirty Duck!

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 01, 1999.

Excuse me, but...

Huh?

(LOL)

-- Sharon (sking@drought-ridden.com), March 01, 1999.

Yes, of course that's what I meant! It just slipped my mind for a mo'. . . Actually, my old runnin' mate, Mick, would be quite proud that I remembered any of what he taught me so long ago. Mick was from down by St. Mary's.

Each leech, vomiting in solution, Produced red edibles, since leeches eat yams! "The King" is one that Mick made more than a few bob off of in the pubs I can tell you!

My French (Ha! Just that phrase is a stretch!) is extremely limited and your examples are news to me, but I guarantee, I'll not forget them.

As for the Dirty Duck, OK, but only if you promise that they'll have some real whiskey there and not just that paint thinner from Scotland!

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 01, 1999.

Sharon, it means, "We must sing and dance together at the Black Swan public house."

So, Hardliner, your running mate was from East London--a real Cockney? Not me, Born near Sherwood Forest, reared in Full Monty and James Herriott country, then lived several years near John Bunyan's stomping grounds. "They" won't let me drink alcohol any more, but I could always introduce you to black velvet (half Guinness and half champagne or scrumpy--hard cider). Sweetie's homebrew would do it too. That'd teach you to cast nasturtiums on Scotland's greatest contribution to mankind. (Sweetie's homebrew would do it too.) By the way, since all those small Scottish distilleries still use equipment from when Elizabeth I was a child, I bet they keep producing that lovely stuff, no matter what Y2K does.

Er--did Mick teach you any rugby songs?

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 01, 1999.

[Largish constable arrives on the scene]

Right. What's all this, then?

You two gennelmen 'ave anything to do with this crowd, may I ask? Not Hyde Park Corner here, lads, and I must ask that you take your discussions elsewhere, as they appear to be causing confusion amongst the local citizenry. There's a Young's house just down the High Street there. Bit of Winter Warmer and you can continue this without interruption. All right then? Good.

[Walks off]

-- Mac (sneak@lurk.com), March 01, 1999.

AND Mrs. diEter yeLLs at me fOR BABbeLIng!y'KNoW!!!!! whY MUsT DIeTER Be so uNlovED????? jaCKals!!!!! IT Is dieTer' wISDom, is iT NOt????? DIETer'S INsiGhT!!!!! YES!!!! nO???? gOoD MOrninG!!!!

-- Dieter (questions@toask.com), March 01, 1999.

Gadzooks, Hardliner! Confusion police! Let's go and have an Old Peculier.

Dieter, we love ya, y'know? Don't even have to axe.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 01, 1999.

Two Scottish for yew too eh? Well's its as plaid as the nose on my face..... something up there in those conversations is bound to be misspelled, but I can't what yet.

-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), March 01, 1999.

Yep! Mick was born within the sound, although he was living in Luton when I met him. We spent a lot of time together, but most of it was out of the UK. We really were "runnin' mates". Actually, rugby didn't come up, except perhaps in an incidental way, and I never learned any of those songs.

As for the booze, I have to tell you, Scotch whisky is simply not biologically compatible with my metabolism. I know that everywhere in the world that you ask for whisky (except America) they give you scotch, but I cannot abide the stuff. (for those readers who have never been to England, I've got to tell you that they drink some of the most horrible stuff and call it "lovely"--just my opinion of course--for the first few times, I actually thought they were being sarcastic, but they usually mean it!). Now I'm always willing to try "homebrew", but if it tastes anything like scotch, there won't be a second time!

Mac,

The only time that I ever "had words with a constable", they were all his, and most of them were, "BLEEDIN' COLONIAL!!" Fortunately he was only a policeman and he didn't sour me on the people. Being a Jarhead pretty much throws you into opposition with the civil police in most places, so it wasn't a new experience!

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 01, 1999.

Hardliner -

Yeah, that's why I worked hard to take on "local coloration" and learn the lingo - got tired of being pegged as a "Colonial". Funny how they lump Yanks, Aussies, Kiwis, and Canucks together, innit? REALLY used to annoy the Canadians I hung out with.

Once I had the accent down, I also occasionally wore a little button that I picked up in the West End. It sported the Union Jack and the phrase "I am not a tourist. I live here!"

Much more pleasant after that.

-- Mac (sneak@lurk.com), March 01, 1999.

Mac,

Somehow, I never got the local coloration down. I guess my "J" toe, high heeled boots and association creased Stetson gave me away. . . I did get asked if I was from Calgary once, does that count?

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 01, 1999.

Robert,

Did you pull a liberty or two on the loch or are you just not a scotch fan?

And BTW, where's Richard? It would seem that he started this off and then took a powder on us!

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 01, 1999.

Hey, Hardliner, have some connections in Luton. Didja ever imbibe at The Mad Hatter? Brother's night club.

Horrible stuff: You're not referring to rum and blackcurrant cordial, are you? Or rum and peppermint cordial? Or a horse's neck (brandy and ginger ale)? Hmmm. See what you mean. Accents; funny thing is, people often ask me if I'm from Oz, NZ or Canada. Someone asked me once if I was from Germany. Also:

Scene, elevator, New Orleans. Me talking to Sweetie. Fellow passenger, suit type, points at me, says, "New England, right?" Me: "No, east of there." FP, puzzled: "But there's NOTHING east of there."

Scene, neighbor's living room, Durham. Other visitor: "Where you from?" Me: "England." OV (serious): "Hey, all RIGHT, I thought you wuz a Yankee."

And I swear I am not making this up. A sales clerk once asked me what language we speak in England.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 01, 1999.

"Old Git",

I know there were occasions when I was thoroughly "pissed" and I was mad as a hatter while in Luton, but I can't honestly say that I recall the club. Was it there in 1974?

Actually, I reckon that the only really 'orrible stuff was the scotch whiskey, but I quite fancy a fried egg on my hamburger still!

You're preaching to the choir about Americans and worldliness. I had a woman guest once who was a Brit (another Cockney--met her in Oz) who responded to the store clerk's question of where she was from with, "New South Wales". "Oh, that's out by Iraan (Iraan, Texas), isn't it?", he said. "No", she came back, "Iran is quite a ways off, actually. It's in Australia." "Oh, that's why I never heard of it," he says, "I don't know much about East Texas." Lest anyone think I am stupid, I'll tell you that I didn't say a word until we got home!

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 01, 1999.

Oh yes, lots of fun with British and European place names in the US! Yep, I think Jon's club was a going concern in '74.

Oldest pub in Britain: Ye Olde Trip to Jerusalem, opened in 11-something. In Nottinghamshire people refer to each other affectionately as "duck," and greetings are often in the form of "'Ey up!" In Yorkshire, just over the border, it wouldn't be unusual to hear an old git use the terms "thee" and "thou" although usually corrupted, as in "Tha's a nuisance!" (Thou is--). And, of course, as in "It's a funny owd [old] thing, tha knows." Perhaps THAT's where "you know" came from.

I do know one thing, the majority of those people will come through Y2K very well. Because there are so many buildings built centuries ago, it's a lot easier to believe that people will survive Y2K. Perhaps that's why Brits and Europeans aren't quite so worried about the problem. A part of the city of York, for instance, has been excavated and quite substantial Roman and Viking remains have been found, excavated, and opened to the public as a museum. With ancient history quite readily visible in many parts of Britain and Europe, a cataclysmic event seems pretty remote.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 01, 1999.

Not a scotch (liquid type) fan - my only vices are two-three (all right, three or four max) pots of coffe a day, bad puns, and bad typing.

We don't know where the "cook" moniker came from -it might be Scottish, it might be "made up on the spot" - the family sort of cropped up in mid Tennesee all by its lonesome somewhere in the mid 1840's - but didn't seem to come from anywhere before that. Traced a couple of itinerate preachers, a few parts and pieces of Indians, a few Kansas Jayhawkers and bushwackers, a couple of Uncivil War veterns of various reputes (ill- and no- for the most part apparently), and then a few tall, skinny types showed up in the middle of a bunch of short relatives in North Texas, just about 6 months (as a great grandfather put it) that a few other would-be relatives left in the middle of the night for "the west".

So my family tree might be wrapped up with scot tape - but we really aren't sure. Too much duct tape and mid 1800's stealth technology to be sure. The rest of Jean's relatives (both sides) are pure German and Slovakian farmers and bricklayers and polka dancers, so I'm positive I didn't get my bad typing habits from them.

-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), March 01, 1999.

Dis is goofy, aina hey?

-- Steve Hartsman (hartsman@ticon.net), March 02, 1999.

Hi Rob, sounds like Sweetie's family tree! He has some Kiowa in there too. And definitely secured with Scots tape! (Each of Sweetie's three names is Scottish.) My mother was from an Irish Catholic family and Dad is English Protestant, which means I can argue either side of The Troubles equally well.

I wonder if Jean's polka-dancing side produced the Texan who broke my little toe in Magnolia, TX? (We were winding up a long evening with friends after a visit to the Hun and Limey.)

Steve, what on earth is that goofy accent?

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 02, 1999.

PS - If you're asked what any of this has to do with Y2K, tell 'em it's for stuff to talk about after the TV goes down.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 02, 1999.

Being Canuckianian, I have no accent at all, of course!

And having lived overseas, I can usually deal with others wierd pronunciations. But there were a couple of occasions...

The first was in my early days overseas. I was with a Brit friend and she was arguing with her brother about how many moth balls they had eaten. I didn't think that sounded healthy, and they kept telling me "NOT moth balls, MOTH BALLS!" Finally one of them figured out how to say 'r', and I realized it was Mars Bars they were discussing.

Another time I called my brother (living just outside Dallas at the time), and the operator mystified me. It took about 5 tries before I realized that in Texas, 'place' has two syllables and an 'y' before the 'a'(ply-ace).

My Mom taught English as a second language. Her favorite story is about the man who came to get help with spelling a word and shook his head, saying,"English has no log ick"; with which my mother laughingly agreed while explaining the 'a,o,u vs e,i' rule after g's and c's.

-- Tricia the Canuck (jayles@telusplanet.net), March 02, 1999.

Hi, Tricia, in one of my volunteer incarnations I taught English as a second language to Vietnamese refugees. The classroom was my living room. One day, the former-teacher-turned-car-mechanic noticed my cat washing his face, pointed and said, "In Viet Nam that means it will rain." The Next week I wagged my finger at him and said, "We've had no rain all week." "Ah, he replied, "but it rained in Viet Nam!" There was great laughter--it was the first time he had known enough English to make a joke. A good moment.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 03, 1999.

Yes very interesting, seems t'other (Northernism)thing people are now saying is "WHAT IT IS IS", then proceed with explanation, odd use of the verb to be, Hamlet "what it is is to be or not to be" also "WHATEVER" seems to be on everyone's lips, fortunately they've stopped saying "NO WAY" as a conversation killer quite some time ago, Y,KNOW, these speechisms are almost like viruses in the Language sorry Diane don't know much about the satellite hacking , y'know

-- richard of the dale (jcooney@figroup.co.uk), March 03, 1999.

The demise of "No way" goes unlamented. But they're still exhorting me to "Have a nice day," dammit! (No matter how many times I whip round and say, "Don't tell me what kind of a day to have!"--you can only do that to people with a sense of humor, though, and they ain't many of 'em around no more.)

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 03, 1999.

So if they ask "how's it going?" answer - "oh - fair -to-middlin', partly cloudy, occaisional showers."

Or better yet: "... still preparing."

-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), March 03, 1999.

Oh that reminds me of a Norman Schwartkopf story! Seems Stormin' Norman was about to visit a Saudi Arabian installation. One of the Saudi soldiers, who spoke very little English, wanted to meet the general and asked a US soldier about an appropriate greeting. He was duly instructed. Came the hour, and the Saudi saluted General Schwartkopf, saying, "How's it hangin', dude?" Schwartzkopf looked indescribable for a moment, realized at that instant what must have happened, and broke up, slapping his thigh amidst peals of delighted laughter. With his arm around the soldier, like a valued and well-liked friend, Schwartzkopf explained through a translator what had happened, making a friend for life.

Now that's a good Y2k-round-the-campfire story.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 03, 1999.

LOL, Git! Got any more of them campfire type stories, eh?

My big language pet peeve is the misuse of 'try and' for 'try to' - as in "I'll try and get that done, today, if I can't, I'll do it tomorrow"; closely followed by 'like', which must be, like, the most abused word in the English language. Like, didn't ya know?

-- Tricia the Canuck (jayles@telusplanet.net), March 03, 1999.

Yes Robert, us brits are still obsessed with the weather, its usually the first thing people talk about, although its rained here almost incessantly for 18 months it is still noteworthy of conversation (usually of the whinging sort) another talent where we surpass the world, although the swedes have the edge on us in being downright miserable, close run thing though NB we previously had 7 years of drought, now the country is waterlogged (you see talking about the weather again) NB 2 Southern Water have at last found the mains leak in my back garden, after being dug and and reinspected several times, they gave up using the micro chip detectors and resorted to a diving rod thing apparently it wasn't my leak but a neighbours 3 doors away (whose outside loo had sprung a leak, but the sound travels down the pipes) NB these outside loos have become obselete even in backward britain I only use mine occasionally (not not really) NB Friday Street is awash with water from leaky mains, bad drains, overflow from fields etc etc I thought there might have been a natural spring causing the water flow as the house is eponymously named Spring Cottage hopefully after the season, it does have a well sonewhere

-- rick of the dale (jcooney@figroup.co.uk), March 04, 1999.

Oh me gosh, I've stumbled into an online Narcotics Annon. meeting!! "And um y'know man, like then I, well, um y'know......Roflsh

-- consumer (private@aol.com), March 04, 1999.

Hello, Richard! There is a new television show starting on March 24th here in "the States" called "It's Like, You Know!" Is that brilliant, or what? I mean, WOW man! It's not even a "valley girl" type show either, ya know?

-- Gayla Dunbar (privacy@please.com), March 04, 1999.

Richard,

You all may be obsessed with the weather but I have a Brit friend who was astonished, when visiting the U.S. of A. that everyone kept asking How are you? with virtually every greeting. (Shes right, BTW).

Finally her response was Do you really want to know?

Usually the reply was Not really.

Diane, doan know nothin' a'tall

-- Diane J. Squire (sacredspaces@yahoo.com), March 04, 1999.

As usual, us Canuckians follow both the Brit and the Yank examples (my apologies to those south of M-D line). We ask everyone how they are and follow up by talking about the weather ;-)

When I was a pre-teen, my family moved to Africa for 4 years. It took me several days before I figured out that the weather questions were an insider joke between my parents and their friends. I didn't know that rain in Zambia in June-October is a *major* miracle! It's pretty common 'round here (as though we, like, get so much summer we can afford to waste it, y'know).

-- Tricia the Canuck (jayles@telusplanet.net), March 04, 1999.

Sweetie, who's from West Texas, calls a torrential rain a "frog-strangler." If home brew is involved, then it's probably going to be a "turd-floater." With typical British understatement, this old git is likely to comment that it "seems a bit dampish."

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 04, 1999.

Maybe you've heard about the cow and the flat rock?

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 04, 1999.

Ok, Hardliner, I'll bite. What's with the cow and the flat rock?

-- Tricia the Canuck (jayles@telusplanet.net), March 04, 1999.

Tricia,

It's nothing to "bite" on really; just a somewhat vulgar expression in these parts to describe an extremely heavy rain as in, "It's rainin' like a cow pissin' on a flat rock!"

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 04, 1999.

Hardliner, I've heard cats and dogs, and buckets, but that was a new one on me (at least, not ON me, I hope)

-- Tricia The Canuck (jayles@telusplanet.net), March 04, 1999.

Normally, I abstain from the intellectual fingerpainting so valued on esteemed threads such as this one, but I can't help but git that Hardliner has "been" (wink, wink) to Texas. Ever "been" here, Hardliner?

-- Lisa (excuse@me.sorry_leaving_now_continue_on!), March 04, 1999.

Aw, shucks, ma'm! 'course I been to Texas! I was stationed at the Naval Air Station in Dallas for a while, and I've landed at NAS B'ville, NAS K'ville, NAS Corpus (lots of times) and most of the AFBs (Carswell, Dyess, Sheppard, an' mosta' the rest, too)! Shoot! I even declared a 'mergency smack dab over the top of DFW Regional onct! Hoo-Ha! They was 727s, 737s, 747s 'n who knows what all jest a fallin' over each other ta' get outta the way! An' it was such a purty day too!

But tell me, howd'ja know???

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 04, 1999.

Hardliner, Sweetie was at Beeville, Kingsville and Corpus NASs. Finally went into S-3s. Hadn't heard the cow-rock one, Sweetie has, of course.

Sir Richard, is it Loch Lomond where they say, if you can see the mountain, it's about to rain. If you can't see the mountain, it's raining.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 04, 1999.

"Old Git",

"Sweetie" did alright for himself; S-3s are definitely posh airplanes. Now if they could just figure out how to get one aboard a carrier. . .(that would be a carrier!!!)

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 05, 1999.

I'll have you know my Sweetie got his S-3 on the Independence scores of times, in combat conditions too. Huh! Cheeky sod. Why, you should have seen him tracking the Libyan submarine. I mean THE Libyan sub, they only have one. No instruments needed, it was leaking so much oil Sweetie could follow it just by looking out of the cockpit.

I'm going to tell my Marine story now. Pre-Sweetie I dated this Marine named Jack. So we're out one night and Jack says something about, yada, yada, "ergo--that's Latin for hence. . ." and I jump in with, "Pas de merde, that's French for no sh--." Only time in my life I ever had the bon mot. (Another Y2K campfire story.)

Okay, so I have a uniform fetish. UPS, Postal Service, Terminix, they all look wonderful to me.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 05, 1999.

Sire Hard of the liner -

Last time I saw an S-3 take-off it was *from* a carrier - I was looking through the periscope, the carrier was a "couple" of miles off to the northeast and sonar was reporting "thuds" and "bangs" from that bearing - in addition to the usual ship and propeller noises that can "always" be heard for tens of thousands of yards.

So the skipper got curious, stuck up an antenna too - and called out on the anti-submarine control for the closest S-3 driver. One answered - it turns out to be the S-3 that had just been launched. (Sonar had been picking up the carrier catapult noises and airplane engines as they took off, but didn't know it.)

Anyway, the skipper was a nice guy who wanted to be helpful to "other side" in the wargames - so he grabbed the other pericope, found the S-3 visually, and told him which course to take and where to turn so he could overfly us and drop his practice torpedo. By keeping the airplane in site, he could "fine-tune" the approach and keep coaching the plane driver. Turns out that was the only successful ASW part of the whole exercise - they never found us again.

Got pretty pictures of the carrier though. Right in the periscope crosshairs. There are only two kinds of ships in the ocean - submarines and targets.

-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), March 05, 1999.

Oh now, Robert, that S-3 driver was probably from the drill team, not the Corps of Cadets. . .

-- Loyal Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), March 05, 1999.

Duh. . .oops.

Sorry about the "brain check". Vikings are truly carrier based aircraft, but my poor old thinker was saying S-3 and thinking P-3. Mea Culpa.

When I read the follow on posts, I was even thinking, "What! How in the hell. . .? It doesn't even have a hook! Has Jommy Doolittle been reincarnated? They'd never get it past the island! Even "the net" wouldn't stop that bird!" Then my "little man" returned from somewhere in the dim recesses of my nerve knot and said, "Hey, Homer! She said S-3!" (still quite nice airplanes, but not nearly so posh as a P-3!)

Oh well, I made a mistake once before. . .

And Robert, I'm personally quite fond of submarines. They (at least when submerged) and carriers are the only watercraft that I don't get seasick on!

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 05, 1999.

C-130's have taken off from the Forestal. No catapult though - carrier goes fast, wind blows hard, airplane goes up.

Submarine shoots torpedo, carrier goes down.

-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), March 05, 1999.

Robert,

Although I hadn't heard about the C-130s I have no trouble believing that! (landing would present a problem though) And, did you know that the Israelis fly C-130s like fighters? They land them in the raw desert, at night, do full acrobatics, etc. "Herky" is one helluva bird!

As for submarines, you're preaching to the choir, at least here. All that is necessary to understand is the knowledge that the planet is about 75% covered with water and twice in this century a country about the size of Wisconsin nearly conquered all of it, primarily due to its fleet of submarines.

"Black Shoe" sailors don't get a lot of respect in the "Brown Shoe" community, but Submariners are a notable exception. They've earned it too.

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), March 05, 1999.

Yes I suppose all this how are ya, you're washing your car tempting the rain gods, lovely day, are just displacement conversations (ice breakers) for strangers, well its less controversial than starting a discussion about religion or politics, everyone's agreed about the state of the weather, though I must admit brits can talk at great length about the weather alternatively what they saw on TV last night, have you noticed that any opinion or view expressed in TV documentary seems to become attached to those who watch it, I am sure that many of the forum will agree that TV is a brain- washing medium, its induces a semi-hypnotic state when the mind is most absorbent, of course what you see is carefully edited ( sounds like politik speak "many of you will agree")

see that Monica fainted at Harrods book-signing, must have been the final straw all that effort exercising her wrist

-- dick of the dale (jcooney@figroup.co.uk), March 09, 1999.