I have three sons. All are bright and motivated. All have great plans for the future. They love me and want me to be proud of them. My convictions are to lay low and do nothing towards thier future until after the storm passes it it ever does. They are in love and see nothing but hope. I lack the courage to break their hearts. I think that rapidly progressing events will accomplish what I have not the heart to tell them now. Should I keep my silence and hope that the media will inform them, or should I dash their hopes and tell them what I think? I don't mind playing the coward if There were a chance that the media will do the job. I truly solicite the groups thoughts on this. I cannot be the only one in this position.

Bill in South Carolina

-- Bill Solorzano (notaclue@webtv.net), February 27, 1999

Answers

Bill,

I can empathize with your situation, however, I beleive that a lot of positive things can result from Y2K if we all use it as an opportunity to raise the level of consciousness in our society. Maybe all of this technology and materialism isn't the best thing for mankind to truly evolve. Maybe we can begin to discover ways to live that don't destroy our planet, our fellow man, and all other creatures that belong to it. I recommend that if your sons are at least in their teens, they read a book called "Ismael." If not, read it yourself, and explain it to them.

WITH GORILLA GONE WILL THERE BE HOPE FOR MAN?

-- @ (@@@.@), February 27, 1999.

Hi Bill,

it's hard to generalize from the info you've provided, but I'll tell you this much: my fiancee' and I will be getting married this summer, AND we've both already been preparing for whatever comes next. I don't recommend that anyone put their entire personal life on hold, just prepare for whatever else may follow along thereafter.

Arlin

-- Arlin H. Adams (ahadams@ix.netcom.com), February 27, 1999.

Tell them the truth Bill, show them Big Dog's post on the USPS, show them any one of a number of posts to this and other fora. It's like someone dying in hospital, they would always want to know the truth (I'm generalising here) - most react with anger if they discover accidentaly their condition and the fact that their Doctors lied to them.

They may turn out to be DWGI's - if the SHTF however they will thank you. If it doesn't they SHOULD thank you anyway. It will be a rough transition for them if they ever GI - something we have all faced that are not outright ostriches - they have 10 months - time is running out fast. We will be there in a blink of an eye.

No-one said life was easy - I believe that we're all here for a reason - you're their father, perhaps your reason is to prepare your three sons, they in turn will prepare their significant others...

Something to think about.

Andy

"The conveniences and comforts of humanity in general will be linked up by one mechanism, which will produce comforts and conveniences beyond human imagination. But the smallest mistake will bring the whole mechanism to a certain collapse. In this way the end of the world will be brought about."

Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan, 1922 (Sufi Prophet)

-- Andy (2000EOD@prodigy.net), February 27, 1999.

Andy, I've been trying and trying to get the source of that quote (the Sufi guy). Sometimes he's referred to as a programmer. Does anyone know from whence that quote originated? Sign me a-rententive on this one. It's buggin' me. Thanks!

-- FM (vidprof@aol.com), February 27, 1999.

FM - he was real, the quote is real, there were no programmers and computers after the Great War :) which makes the prediction all the more chilling, you can read his writings at a good Library or bookstore, otherwise do a search on his name on the web.

Good luck!

-- Andy (2000EOD@prodigy.net), February 27, 1999.

Bill,

Sorry, misspelled that title, it's "Ishmael". Also available on audio tape if your boys don't like to read. See this link:

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0553375407/o/qid=920153584/sr=2 -1/002-3751232-0801608

-- @ (@@@.@), February 27, 1999.

Hi Bill,

Tell 'em Bill. Nothing worse than finding out later that you knew and didn't say. Hope is independent of exterior events, having more to do with personality, upbringing and character.

What they do with the information is up to them. Expect they wont get it from what you tell us, but on the other hand maybe they are having secret doubts about what is around the corner and the beginnings of the topic may start an open discussion.

Of my four girls: two GI, one DWGI, and one is waiting for more evidence!

Better a worry that can be dealt with and shared now than a panic that can't be contained later. Good sense for every family member to have a BOB, bag of basics, anyway. So maybe a worse case scenario would be to have one for each regardless of whether they GI or not.

Best of Luck with your conversations:

-- Bob Barbour (r.barbour@waikato.ac.nz), February 27, 1999.

Bill, do what your heart tells you to do. It's a tough one. There's no right/wrong answers on this one really. If you choose not to break their bubbles, at least make sure you can provide for them if SHTF past a 4-5 on the scale.

Alternatively, you could print the info you believe relevant and let it lie around your house very prominently. You'd just make the media more available for them.

-- Chris (catsy@pond.com), February 27, 1999.

Tell them. Better they have a little warning, than have a coward for a father.

-- doyourjob (as@a.father), February 27, 1999.

Bill,

I, too, have three sons. I have always included them in family strategy sessions, and told them immediately about y2k, when I became aware a year ago. One is a high scool senior, and although he gets it (sorta), he said,"Dad, I don't want to think about this." Another is a senior in college, and he has a pretty good grasp of the situation now. I already rely upon his input, and it's good to have a helper so close.

One more thing. I am doing some things which are very different from my norm, right now, (see the thread on buying a 20 grand chicken house) and I would lots rather have my sons understand the reasoning, than to be totally confused by my behavior.

Oh, and finally, just remember how fleeting is this moment we call life. I hope you are able to lead your family into our uncertain future, but prepare them to go it alone if necessary.

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 27, 1999.

I thank you gentle readers. I did not mean to be a whiner. I know that the way I deal with my boys is my thing. It is just that despite my being "King Kong" for my boys all my life, I just don't quite know how to deal with this one.

Sorry: Bill in South Carolina

-- Bill Solorzano (notaclue@webtv.net), February 27, 1999.

I'm for telling the truth. My experience is that your children remember forever when you have lied by omission, and they discover the truth later. It's better to have them upset temporarily than to withold what you know. Lay it out. Let them make their own decisions.

-- Donna Barthuley (moment@pacbell.net), February 27, 1999.

Tell the truth and be blunt. Admit you don't have the all answers, but based on the best information you have, they and the rest of their generation is in for as much of a rollercoaster as the generation which came of age in the 1930s and 1940s.

Remind them of how young people faced a depression and a world war and then went on to become the most successful generation on the planet. Your sons may see similar troubles and triumphs in their future. Or Y2K may be more like another recession of the 1970s.

But give them the facts you have and help them to understand that we can't call the outcome of this event. We have to shape it both personally and nationally and they'll have a roll in that task.

Above all, don't give them gloom and doom and "Your life will be...", because nobody knows. And they're going to make the best of their situation in any case because they're resilient human beings. In fact they're getting a head start on the issue and that's worth an immeasurable amount of preparation, mentally, emotionally and in the conventional terms.

WW

-- Wildweasel (vtmldm@epix.net), February 27, 1999.

Oh and Bill, I agree with everyone's answers also, and Donna has hit the nail right on the head. Plus, as you know from being a father, we're already expected to be full of it and delirious as parents, so you got nothing to lose ;-)

-- Chris (catsy@pond.com), February 27, 1999.

I'm for giving your sons the opportunity of receiving the truth through you now than finding out from some other source later.

I can't begin to tell you how to do this whether it be collectively or individually. I think you may have already taken your first step towards the courage you are seeking by posting your request for advice.

I have two sons of my own, one soon to be twelve, and the other just turned 14. The 14 year old is just entering that phase of his life where he's worldly independence is growing by leaps and bounds. He has such aspirations, hopes, and dreams. He loves cars and has longed for the time when he can drive. I won't go on and on, but it also breaks my heart to think of what lies ahead for them. It feels me with such sorrow sometimes and trmemendous guilt to realise that my life has by-and-large been so care-free and filled with so much and theirs at such a tender age shall have to endure possible hardship if not anything more sinister and worse. But it would seem that we are all headed on an unknown course with an unknown outcome that we cannot prevent. The only hope we have is that the powers that be and all the people working on the front lines trying to fix it can fix as much of it as they can to minimise the impact. That's the reality of it pure and simple.

Right now you are in the possession of something that's very valuable to yourself and more importantly could quite possibly be one of the most valuable gifts you could ever give your sons and that's the knowledge and realisation of how serious this might be. Please don't deny them the opportunity of receiving this knowledge right now. Maybe they will accept it and act accordingly. Maybe they won't. But you will have done your duty and perhaps have planted the seed of truth that will grow inside them before it is really too late.

The only other thing you can do if you are able is to make some provisions for them and offer them shelter from the storm.

I hope this helps a little.

-- Carol (usa-uk@email.msn.com), February 27, 1999.

Dear Bill,

I feel for your sons like you feel about them. Go for the courage. Blast them with reality. It makes them stronger and they have a longer time to heal. Teach them to laugh. Belly laugh. Ask your wife to belly dance.

If it's not Y2K it will be something else. Guaranteed.

-- Not Again! (seenit@ww2.com), February 27, 1999.

Bill, I have had the experience of talking with my grown children and their significant others as well as my teenage granddaughter and ten year old grandson.... it's not easy, it has to be patiently done in a way that won't turn them away, so they will continue to listen to you. My 16 yr. old granddaughter was the most difficult. She didn't want to hear it! I gave everyone in the family a Bug out bag for Christmas. In the kids bags I even put a towel with the "It's a bug's life" logo in ... my granddaughter seemed to get it at that point...they all talk more freely and with less anxst now. And after months of updates on current news from the net...especially govt. reports (which noone can discount as oh that's just stuff from the web), my entire family is working together and no one thinks grandma lost her mind last summer.

I sent these BOBs to my neices and nephews in California (children of my then DGI brother)... they got it! and now my brother is preparing. I think once he saw his teenage son didn't think it was an unreasonable gift he was then more open to receiving the information.

Like so many people he was so busy with daily life: management position, long commute, and 5 (count them! 5!) teenagers....he just didn't have time to consider anything else. I pretty much haunted him with email and finally he took a closer look.

But as everyone has said: time is short...tell them now... it will be easier than dealing with emotional shock later.

-- Shelia (shelia@active-stream.com), February 27, 1999.

I have always been honest and upfront with my children, ages are now 24 and 25. My daughter is still attending college and I pay for her schooling and life for her still goes on until the signs to vacate show up. My son is a railroad engineer and knows what the future holds. My son and his father talk about guns and they plan together the artillery stash, etc. It really isn't an end-of-the-world-scare -the-piss-out-of-you type relationship with our children. They are adults and we are matter of a fact with them. They know that Mom and Dad are here, that we have provided for them no matter what, and that we are a family to the end. And if they choose not to believe us, then they cannot say to you "why didn't you tell me?"

-- bardou (bardou@baloney.com), February 28, 1999.

Bill --

Think it through. By not telling your boys now, you avoid doing something that might disturb them. But by keeping silence, you run the risk that they will come to you afterwards, asking, "You knew this was coming? And you didn't tell us?" Which might shake them up even more.

On this, it's your call. Nobody else can do it for you.

-- Tom Carey (tomcarey@mindspring.com), February 28, 1999.

Bill, your posts have always struck me as honest and courageous. What's happened with your family to make you feel that you couldn't be that way with them?

There are lots of threads where turning DGI's to GI's are discussed, take a look for some non-threatening ideas on how to present this to your sons. If they know that you're concerned for them, even if they think your concern is baseless, they're unlikely to react badly.

My prayers go with you; let us know how this turns out, okay?

-- Tricia the Canuck (jayles@telusplanet.net), March 01, 1999.