If the truth came out, all of us preparing for Y2K would suddenly be taking a number in lines longer than I care to imagine. So I prefer the ignorant to the enlightened. By the way, I heard on Art Bell that some bank in the US ran out of money recently. Shades of things to come?

Shadow

-- shadow (foo@foo.com), February 15, 1999

Answers

According to CNNfn, the reason for the sharp drop in ATM available cash was the incredible Valentine's Day Shopping Rush.

Guess our fearless leader inspired the men of this nation to spend bucks on their many "inappropriate relationshipees" on top of cash spent on their wives. Y'know, Hat pins, broches, books like "Leaves of Grass", and new dresses in case of accidental spills.

They claim Valentines is now the fifth most favorite holiday, behind only Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween and Easter.

Bite me CNN. Maybe we should all work on our Halloween costumes for this Fall. We could all dress-up like that great Charlatan Lizard- Man: Koskinen. What fun huh?

-- INVAR (gundark@aol.com), February 16, 1999.

Of course! Duh, how could I have overlooked that great shop till you drop day, Valentines! Right behind boxing day, right?

Shadow

-- shadow (foo@foo.com), February 16, 1999.

Yes, so many gift buying holidays, so little time!

Don't miss the exciting "Ash Wednesday" Sale-A-Thons!!!

Retailers are bracing for brisk consumer business with early season Mardi Gras Sale-a-brations!!!!

Beat the Lenten Shopping rush! Order your Friday fish early!

Oops, forgot to fill the ATM's. But don't worry! They'll be plenty cash available for the next major shopping blitz of the year: St. Patrick's Day! Shoppers will be painting the town in greenbacks!

Get your St. Patrick's trees up! Easter's 'round the corner!

-- INVAR (gundark@aol.com), February 16, 1999.

And don't forget July 4th -- Independence Day -- where there was (dare I say it) a Revolution against the established and lawful government of the time.

Give your sweetie a new shotgun.

-- A (A@AisA.com), February 16, 1999.

How about today! It's Mardi Gras! weeee!! I'm going on a bead-buying spree! And booze and food to gorge myself 'till I puke!

Oh my...will the ATM's hold?

-- Chris (catsy@pond.com), February 16, 1999.

Chris--

You little "pagan"... :>) Have fun!

-- Scarlett (ohara@tara.net), February 16, 1999.