I was talking with my wife and son about a post that I read somewhere concerning the stocking up of a product called Beano (flatulence reduction aid). The post suggested that changes in our dietary habits in a post Y2K world might possibly yield undesirable side effects. Having never purchased the product primarily due to the dreaded supermarket checkout embarrassment scenario, a discussion ensued.

What are some the most embarrassing products to purchase? Or better yet, lets load up the basket with every item we can think of in an attempt to embarrass ourselves and the cashier!

My Y2k survival/barter basket.

beano condoms tampons sanitary napkins ky jelly Hustler magazine vaseline petroleum jelly massengil summers eve ex-lax adult videos

Another scenario would include items in and of themselves not embarassing, but in combination......

a can of whipped cream and a bic razor

a toilet plunger, clothes pins, and room deodorizer

a dog collar, a leash, and a Halloween mask(on sale)

Time Bomb 2000, Yourdan's structured methodologies manual, NoDoz, Rolaids, and a IBM 360 BAL manual (this one for technogeeks over the age of 50 only)

Ok, I've got the ball rolling. What are some of your most embarrassing products?

-- MVI (vtoc@aol.com), November 15, 1998

Answers

My buddy has already bought two years worth of "Beano", but now the joke is he might need the methane for fuel. His other must have item is "Preperation H", and I think there is a high embarrassment factor associated to anyone buying more than one tube! Lots of "crack" jokes with that one. I bought 48 rolls of TP the other day when it was on sale, that makes 144 total rolls at about 20 cents a roll. Great barter item.

-- Bill (bill@microsoft.com), November 15, 1998.

My most embarassing Y2K purchase:

45 acp JHP

K-Y Jelly

Mustard

Plastic sheeting

Fix-a-Flat

Condoms

Mitchum deodorant

Yes, that's right folks, it was a shopping day from hell.

-- Uncle Deedah (oncebitten@twiceshy.com), November 15, 1998.

One inflatable wendy.

One puncture repair kit.

-- humpty dumpty (civilisation@anend.com), November 16, 1998.

Are you using Wendy for water storage?

-- Bill (bill@microsoft.com), November 16, 1998.

Uncle D.,

Mustard??!!!?

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), November 16, 1998.

I have made no embarrassing purchases. You can not embarrass a Jarhead; just ask the Navy. We can only embarrass ourselves and some of us do, frequently. . .

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), November 16, 1998.

I'm a nurse and a mom. Nothing embarrasses me or disgusts me (if it's moral ofcourse). I do grocery every week as a mom and buy all those embarrasing items for family members ;) (except Wendy and the mags ofcourse ;P)

Deedah, you got me real curious now...what's the embarrasing factor about buying Mustard? Should I even ask? (blinking innocent eyes)

-- Chris (catsy@pond.com), November 16, 1998.

Geez.....the mustard thing is easy to figure out.

It's a condoment

-- Craig (craig@ccinet.ab.ca), November 16, 1998.

...but is it a compliant condoment, or will you get a complaint about it not being compliant?

-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), November 16, 1998.

And since Paramedics are even more disgusting (and therefore undisgustable) than nurses .................

nothing embarrasses my wife or me anymore.

C

The last time I saw my wife blush I actually had to work on the project for a couple of days. the set up, the string along, the punch line, It was Great!! . . . . . . (the payback was HE*L!!!!!!!!!)

-- Chuck a Night Driver (rienzoo@en.com), November 17, 1998.

If Craig uses mustard as it might be inferred (by someone as twisted as an old Jarhead), then it would indeed bring complaints (as suggested by Robert) from any of the ladies of my own admittedly limited acquaintance.

-- Hardliner (searcher@internet.com), November 17, 1998.