Ever feel like you can't go on?greenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread
I do. My own family thinks I've "lost it". I haven't slept well in months, although the Serzone which I've started taking helps somewhat. I find no joy in my life lately, although Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa helped. The Packers and Badgers keep me hanging until the weekend comes. South Park used to do it for me; now, it seems old. Other than folks on the Net, no one seems to "get it". I'm tired of trying to "spread the word", and all that's left is feeling isolated, depressed, ridiculed, and overwhelmed.
Please, don't write with religious messages. I'm OK with my higher power. I guess I just need a little more strength than my old bones can muster, and I'm wondering where you guys get it from...
-- Steve Hartsman (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 01, 1998
The strength you need you already have. I find these things help and they are pretty ordinary.. Limit your time on the Net to one hour per day.
Exercise in whatever way you can at least one hour per day, walking, if nothing else is possible, go Mall walking.. its warm and dry and there are things to look at and do and you are out of the house. Eat a balanced diet, cut out coffee and drink water Add a standard vitamin suppliment to your diet. Get yourself on a reward system, things done, you get rewarded. You, like the rest of us, still have to get through day by day despite Y2K.
Do what you can do quietly for two months and let other sources tell the story for you. Back up a bit on being a 'Noah'.. you can't look after others if you are not together yourself.
Remember you are not alone.. most people reading this forum have gone through, are going through, or will go through what you are experiencing. In some respects you are fortunate. You are working through the the reality check most folks don't know exists yet. It is most important to keep talking to other people where ever you find a listening ear..
-- Bob Barbour (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
Steve (and anyone else undergoing despair, due to Y2K fears or any other reason):
Please, please, PLEASE read this book.
It's a life-changer if ever there was one. It's cheap; it's a paperback; get it; read it. Maybe it'll help a little.
(I didn't write it, the author died years ago, I don't stand to profit. Just trying to share the philosophical wealth.)
-- suggestion (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
Very good choice of books, haven't read it in years (talk about survivalist!). Prepare,prepare,prepare. Go buy 50 lbs of rice at Costco/Sams ($10-15), go cut some firewood, read a book on gardening... Talk with like minded friends and don't try to convince others. Savior a good steak, bottle of wine, hot shower, etc... If you are prepared life will go on.
-- Bill (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
Seems I asked this same question just last week and what helped was this - took a break from total immersion in the subject. Just lived my life, played with my kids, etc. - and stayed away from news, the Net, and all of it.Sounds simplistic - I know it does - but it did help me. That, and the many responses to MY "darkest hour". You have done so much work on this subject, Steve. Take a break.
-- Melissa (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
I'm too far away and this forum won't be quite adequate (-2 sp) so, If you know anyone in the Emergency Services areas, or a mental health pro who has familiarity with the Mitchel Model, they may be able to help a bit. It sounds kinda like you are experiencing a slightly lengthened version of CIS (Critical Incident Stress). There are a number of coping strategies available through someone who has been properly trained.
Primarily, you need to get your regular schedule back, and could benefit from things like a specific routine for exercise, relations with family, specific relations with your significant other, and VERY Specific Relations with said significant other.
what you describe is fairly normal for a normal person who has been presented with an abnormal stressor. You AIN'T CRAZY!! You're just responding in a normal way to an abnormal situation.
Been there in a more acute version, and can relate!
-- Chuck a Night Driver (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
I know you're a good reasonable fellow. Have seen your PowerPoint presentation, talked with you by e-mail, all that.
You said no religious stuff so I won't.
This might sound simplistic and dumb and male chauvinistic piggish, but I'll say it anyway:
When I get down, there are two good ol' Western Americana-type things that will perk me right up, get me empowered right quick.
#1. that Clint Eastwood movie "The Outlaw Josey Wales", 1976
#2. the CBS miniseries with my 2nd and 3rd favorite actors of all time (Robert Duvall and Tommy Lee Jones), "Lonesome Dove", 1989
They just kinda make ya wanna get up and go, "Shoot! If they could do all that, so can I"
-- John Howard (Greenville, NC) (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
Take a minivacation, disconnect your computer for a week, quit trying to convince people that it's TEOTWAWKI, find a hobbie and put some of your energy there, listen to relaxing music, get a massage, take up hiking and early morning walks, and enjoy your present moment. Pat yourself on the back for having the insight and energy to be able to see things as they really are and prepare for the unknown. I went through the same thing several months ago. You feel so overwhelmed, but I came to the realization that I have done all I can do, and I have to accept what may or may not happen. And I feel good about that!
-- Bardou (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
Steve - Good question. I just had my first sleepless night last night, after a suppressed memory about my short-lived experience on a Year 2000 project reasserted itself and I realized that everything people are saying probably is true. I went from 0 to 8 in about five minutes, not good. I guess we should try what these people are saying.
-- Amy Leone (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
A common contributor to depression is sleep deprivation. If taking a sleeping pill helps to break the cycle, I'm all for it. I learned progressive relaxation exercises, and I find them invaluable. You can likely find an audio-tape to help you learn the exercises at a bookstore. Another good resource to relax is laughter - seen any good comedies lately? BTW, our local newspaper ran a _Dilbert_ about y2k yesterday which I enjoyed, but found the humour to be a bit black. Best wishes for *restful* sleep.
-- Tricia the Canuck (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
Ask your local Boy Scout troop/Girl Scout troop if you go on their next campout as an extra "adult sponsor" or "adult helper".
Let the Scoutmaster know what's up "you want a couple days off, out of regular grind, want to "get away from routine" and "learn some camping stuff", "can I help with anything?"
He may need some references, if you aren't already a registered scouter, but will probably welcome you along to help. The fresh air/change of everything (location, view, climate, and the definite change in life styles (camping, cooking, making do) will help calibrate you.
-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
Steve, my friend (though we've never really met) -
A few years back, many parts of my life (personal, professional, you name it) went south simultaneously, and I found myself in the very dark valley of clinical depression. I had never been there before and have not visited since, but I vividly remember the sense of numbness, darkness, and futility which gripped me. I was off work for two weeks and not all that effective in many ways for longer than that. It took a few months, in fact, but eventaully I did climb all the way out of the valley.
What helped most was finding ways to get away from the areas which were not working and finding little "tasks" at which I could succeed. Whether it was clearing the backyard of weeds or making changes at my work (my boss and position was one of the items that was "failing", so I got myself transferred to a different dept and job), it's important to find small ways to succeed. These small successes are not trivial at all - no success is.
Find non-Y2K things to enjoy - heck, I'm spending about 10 hours a week from now through November directing a children's musical! Sure, I could be spending those hours preparing and planning for Y2K, but then I would miss out on the energy and joy and fun of working with the kids, including my daughter. That energy then feeds into the rest of my life, including the time I do spend preparing and planning for Y2K.
We're going to make it, Steve. Things will be very different post-2000 and times between now and then (and after) will likely be very hard indeed, but we're going to make it. Do what you can today, be patient with yourself and others, and most important, find places for joy. Even though it's dark, there's joy to be found, always. Take care.
-- Mac (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
Stuff that keeps me going: - time for my hobbies - chocolate (the good stuff) - excercise and fresh air - knowing that whatever happens, my family will be prepared - this bulletin board [even when they give me a hard time about birdseed cookies ; ) ]
-- Karen Cook (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
I think it helps that I don't have internet access on the weekends so two days a week I'm not overloading on Y2K info. I've also stopped reading articles as often - I'm already convinced that we'll have problems, and I'm spending more energy on preparations than research.
This doesn't mean that I stop thinking about Y2K completely on the weekends. I still pick up a few extra food items each time I go shopping and make purchases based on the question "Will I really *need* this post-Y2K?" The point is not to dwell too much on it.
-- Melinda Gierisch (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
I too have seen that dark and fearsome place. Getting out of bed seems a far too difficult task, while knowing that "something is wrong here, why am I doing this?" I am also quite happy that I have been able to leave the place where all of life's joy is sucked from you.
It will pass, tough as it seems now. It always does, and I've had a few bouts. Best advice is to keep the blood flowing. Find something that keeps your heart pumping, take a walk, shoot some hoops, whatever. Fresh air and exercise sounds corny, but it helps. I really do know where you're coming from, life just doesn't seem at all the same for me since I found out, even when the bastards kill Kenny.
This too shall pass.
-- Uncle Deedah (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
Yes, it's like a bad dream from which you want to wake up. I often wish I could be less intuitive and more like the rest of the population. I think that those of us who are preparing and warning will be held in contempt by those whose awareness occurs at the eleventh hour. I think that a lot of people who might feel compelled to take action are afraid to do for fear of looking foolish in the case that it is no big deal.
My three children keep me grounded. I have maintained all their extra cirricular activities to keep things as normal as possible, and it helps keep the joy in our lives. They are my driving force and because of them and for them I will do what it takes to get through this as painlessly as possible.
-- Terri Symington (TJSYM@AOL.com), October 02, 1998.
Those bastards! They killed Kenny!!!!!!!
Steve, I have about one day a week where I'm riding the roller coaster. My last low place was very low, but I have some Y2K friends, also happen to be pretty loving and psychologically saavy, and I hollared for help. Two weeks before I found out about Y2K my 12-year old nephew was killed tragically. I came back home from being there with them and plunged into Y2K..or got plunged, still haven't figured that out yet.
My thoughts...be very good to yourself, as a loving parent would to a child who is frightened. Imagine yourself as the strong, capable adult you are who also has a part of yourself fearful, unsure. It helps to compartmentalize this a bit. Take time out, as others have said. Look at each thing you do to prepare as a something fantastic. Cos it is. Ask for help. Ask for hugs. Find ways to laugh. Get out into the air.
Hang in there, we are here with you.
-- Donna Barthuley (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
I agree with most of the above suggestions. Getting physical in some way (sports, garden, clean out the garage) will give your psyche a lift. Try to keep the following things in mind; 1.) Even with the worst possible Y2K situation (loss of the modern world) life WILL go on. Humanity will not cease to exist. To quote Arnold S, "We Vill BE BACK!".
2.) There are tens of thousands of people who share your Y2K concern. You are not alone.
3.) Consider that there may be a Higher reason for your insight and so regard it as a Divine Gift and (and sometime burden).
4.) Get off the computer for awhile and savor your precious life. Then, get on with what you know is the right thing to do with a sense of humor. Above all, be patient and gentle with those around you.
5.) Do NOT take tranquilizers or sleeping pills for more than a few days (if at all). They are poisonous to the mind and body. Exercise, good food and water, good sex and clean air are far preferable. If it is within you, try a conversation with God. Thats right, converse, as in two way conversation. It is possible.
6.) Cease trying to convert others for now. You need to get your own center back. You can help others best if you can help yourself.
-- R. D..Herring (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 02, 1998.
I have been so touched by everyone's thoughtfullness & compassion in their posts!! It brought tears to my eyes! We are all "family" & share a common bond. I am going to print this thread so that when we are called "kooks" or doomsayers or whatever, I can show them that we are just ordinary caring folks trying to get thru some extraordinary circumstances. I'm not very good with words, but wanted everyone to know how proud I am to be considered one of you!
I too had to take a break from all the reading etc. Am trying to get back to doing some of those things that I enoy, reading (I love the Star Wars books!) back to working on those Xmas presents which I make myself...it's so easy to immerse yourself in y2k that you forget to stop and smell the roses!! Having an e-mail buddy has been a great help to me, someone to compare notes with..even tho we've never met I consider her such a good friend! (you know who you are, smile :o) !
Hang in there, we are with you...
Warm regards to everyone...Donna
-- Donna in Texas (Dd0143@aol.com), October 02, 1998.
Many thanks to one and all. I'm sorry I don't have time to respond to everyone individually (including those who e-mailed me directly). I do not have the time, and, besides, it would force me to spend more than an hour per day on the computer...
Excellent recommendations from everyone. I went to check the recommended book at the local library--it was out. I got on a waiting list for it, and look forward to reading it. Both my wife and I lost many family members in the Holocaust, so I'm sure we will both read it... It looks like one I would want for my permanent library, but I usually check them out for free first...
I am truly touched by the outpouring of support, and I can't tell you how much it helps to know I'm not alone. I know that when times get rough (as they surely will), I can count on everyone here. I only hope that I can return the kindness and generosity when I will be counted upon to do so.
I recant my original statement... South Park still KICKS A*S!!! In times of crisis, my sense of humor is usually the first thing to go. Laughter has truly helped me get through this crisis, and many of your letters brought a large grin.
Thanks again, one and all.
-- Steve Hartsman (email@example.com), October 02, 1998.
Dear Steve, I am sure just knowing that you have so many friends in "computer land" has lifed your spirits. I applaud all those great answers. One thing that works for me is just doing one y2k thing a day to get ready. When I am really tired it might just be a "how to article on a skill not yet acquired. No matter what we do, we will never be completely ready. We just have to remember how much better off we will be for every effort. My husband and I run a demanding business, which actually helps us get away from y2k. Work is a good healthy thing, if not overdone. What works for me... horseback riding, and small parties at home with people who are or are not preparing. I usually don't mix the groups. With all this good advice (and aren't we FULL OF IT?) I just know you are doing better already! Abigayle
-- James Greenleaf (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 03, 1998.
One last thought about all of this.
The bright side of the chaos from Y2K: it is perhaps the best opportunity for an average guy like you or I to become king, and rule the world, that we have seen in centuries.
-- Uncle Deedah (email@example.com), October 03, 1998.
I was in a deep dark hole,too. I just went out and bought a couple of boxes of Lego's, and my son and I have been having a ball with them! Plus, we can still use them when there's no power,and it has been breaking that T.V. and computer "trap". I agree, that when you feel yourself slipping out of reality, you need to UNPLUG!! Do something REAL,have a holiday from y2k. Dont wait until Christmas to have a get- together,have one for no good reason-other than to give yourself something to look forward to.
-- madeline (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 03, 1998.
I don't know if what I am about to tell you puts me into a dark place or not but here goe's: My wife loves to shop and hates to drive. I like to drive but hate to shop, ergo, I find myself sitting in the mall a lot of the time and people watch. I find myself catagorizing folks. There are: Those who will make it. Those who won't make it. Those I hope make it. and Those I kinda hope don't make it. I find it very entertaining but sometimes very sad. It seems as though the knowledge of y2k trivializes so much of what I see. I get this "Evangelical" urge to tell people. Then I remember the item on Gary North's page about the Grandmother who got custody of her grandson from his parents because they were moving to a safer place for y2k. I no longer tell anyone and it makes me feel kind of guilty. There is nothing wrong with yelling "Fire" in a crowded theater when you smell the smoke and feel the heat, even if there is not yet any flame. Or is there?
-- Bill Solorzano (email@example.com), October 03, 1998.
I also wanted to say don't forget that this is a war and your emotions will run the gamut. Don't think that you can control them, because they control you. You know that, you've just spent two months without being able to sleep well. One thing that helps is to blow off a little steam. We all do that in these various threads, although I don't see you doing it a lot. I wonder if you are the type of person who feels he has to be strong for everyone else. Of course your family thinks you are nuts, most people are from Missouri, the Show Me state. Of course we don't have much to show them. Don't be so hard on them and don't be so hard on Steve.
-- Amy Leone (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 03, 1998.
Steve, you've already been given so many good ideas that I'm not going to add to those. I just wanted to tell you that you did the right thing by asking the question, opening up, and talking about it. I think we get into trouble when we try to keep things inside. I'm so glad we have this forum and can communicate with "like minded people." And I just want to add a SHOUT OF JOY! My oldest sister (I have 3) has started to prepare! Her daughter talked her into getting the Internet and guess what? Yep! I directed her to a few websites....and SHE GETS IT NOW! There is hope!
-- Gayla Dunbar (email@example.com), October 03, 1998.
The problems you feel here are real, don't minimize or trivialize them, but also don't let them get you so far down you're under(ground).
The fundamental problem is in your being so capable: that you are actually here a little bit as a "prophet" - having a little more (smarts, knowledge, awareness, sensitivity, system-awareness, intuition, forthought, "connectivity" ) or whatever you want to call it towards the world at large and how tightly interconnected things are nowdays.
Most people aren't skilled enough, or aren't interested enough in things past the screen of their boob tube (maybe literally if you ever see cable TV lately) to notice that there are problems out there. I don't think that the problem is past their level of understanding - let's assume that 80% could understand it -- if they were put in a place where they had to listen. But the mass media (mass business, mass government too?) is only apparently aware of profits, not realists. They (the mass media, and the massed governments) are also all emotionally married to big solutions by big government. These people are fundamentally not capable of wanting to understand the "big picture" you see so clearly.
That's why its so troubling to see that the most "aware" and far-sighted people (as you notice on the other threads) are either in the computer or technical businesses, or are related to the power/computer businesses/utility end of things. It happens that way because those who (of us) who have to solve computer problems on a dialy/hourly basis are all to aware of how unfeeling and uncaring the d**m things are.
They (the computers) DON'T care how much you may want a solution to the problem of power distribution, how thirsty you are, or how desparately you are sucking for life from an empty IV tube, they will stop the pumps - dead.
Until they (the pumps, the motors, and the IV) are re-started by people who have the free will to "break the rules" and THINK. Remember, some of th e"automatic" shutdowns are corect and absolutely required for safety = trains perhaps, operating without signals, are unasafe until manuall signals are passed down the line. But an FAA controller or power station engineer may need to think immediately of new solutions to get people back safely. Most likely, he or she will only be able to do this by breaking the "rules" = the common train of thought and training geared to being used to rapid electronic or based on the "copper triangle" must be immediately changed.
With forethought and training (awareness), some of these preconceved notions can be changed. The world can survive, if these troubles are known about and prevention begins early enough. Would that it were 94 or 95, there would be plenty of time. There isn't. Even triage will leave thousands of programs dead and damaged. But the mentality of "big government" being a mother is so wishfully ingrained in these people that I've hear several times: "But the government wouldn't let it happen." They don't have the capability of imagining just how thoroughly things can get screwed up when interrelated systems fail in various ways.
Most people can't follow the trails of knowledge, power, communication, and control now woven through their lives. And they have, so far, been insulated from this lack of knowledge: how many VCR's still sit, with the time endlessly blinking 12:00?
People can't program VCR's, so TV Guide puts numbers in their listing to let the "master" programmer tell their TV when to turn on and off. They fail to turn off bathroom faucets, so automatic timers are installed to turn them off for them. The lsit is near endless.
They (these kind of people) can't imagine a "thing" existing that doesn't "follow orders" or that can't be told what to do - but computers don't care whose giving orders, they roll on (or stop, depending on how you look at it) despite orders. Its only through intervention (overrides) or prevention (re-programming) that the problems will be solved. Both require preparation by knowlegdeable people -- unknowing, unprepared people have no chance except random good luck of surviving without significant disruptions.
There are critical people who exist in every trade who will halp solve the problem - even my barber can trim hair if the lights go out by using her shears instead of a clipper. But you have to know them, and to talk to them. They may be good people, but the mass media has failed to deliver any worthwhile information so far. Thus, the delivery is up to you.
So, like a prophet, you have to stride through and keep your own head up. Take care of yourself, first your spirits, then your physical self. The rest will come.
You have felt the drought, and have gone out into the woods and checked the trees. Yep, they are dry. There is a high wind blowing from the west, and no clouds are in sight. No rain is forecast, no snow will fall for months, but a lightening storm is predicted within hours. There is constant flickering and flashing to west, the warnings seem justified. But again, you can't be absolutely sure that lightening will hit a tree in the forest where you live.
You have talked to some park rangers, and have found some retired smoke jumpers. All agree there is some big trouble coming, but, like you, they don't how serious it will be, nor how long, nor how big an area will be burned by a future forest fire. But these experienced people, who have fought forest fires for a living, are getting smoke blankets, clearing off their roofs, and checking out their household water supplies. Some are taking a drastic step and are clearing timber from their property. Others are trimming undergrowth, but none are building wooden houses with wood shingles.
You have walked past the local fire department, and found them complacent. No worries, they tell you, we've fought house fires before, they are easy to put out. We have a truck here that can dump 1000 gal a minute on a blaze. (You notice it has a 5000 gal tank, but there is no refill available. That's okay, we get the water from the hydrant, they assure you.)
The local politicians, the local TV hosts, the local fire department interview each other. They mutually decide your warnings are the work of "fundementalists survialists, kooks, and extremists".
But the weather keeps getting drier, and wind keeps growing.
I hope we are wrong. But the forest fire, if, when it does begins burning, won't listen to hopes. It will respond only to action. To action by prepared people, acting with forsight.
And you are one of those with the courage to have foresight. And thanks for "power"ful way you have of "pointing" it out.
-- Robert A. Cook, P.E. (Kennesaw, GA) (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 03, 1998.
Hmm, well I don't really have anything usefull to add, so i'll just say that there is one other person out here who praying for you. I also wanted you to know that just because people may reject your message initially doesn't mean some of your message didn't get in, and the ones that look at you like you are crazy, are actually afraid that you are right and are just trying to defend themseleves.
-- Vic (Light_servant@yahoo.com), October 04, 1998.
Interesting that this topic was recently addressed on the csy2k ng. One party insisted that, since most people wouldn't do anything anyway, it was preferable not to spread the word. The logic being that it would allow others who were more aware to better prepare (rather than diminishing their chances in the panic). The counter-argument (advocated by Paul Milne, btw) was that a general warning to as many as possible was the most moral thing to do, letting each base his own decision on the information provided. Very interesting thread. You can read it here: http://x7.dejanews.com/dnquery.xp?search=thread&svcclass=dncurrent&thr eaded=1&ST=PS&CONTEXT=907507360.194314413&HIT_CONTEXT=907507360.194314 413&HIT_NUMemail@example.com%3e%231/1
As for myself, I wouldn't yell "fire" until I was at the exit door of the theater.
"Tell the truth and run."---George Seldes
-- Hallyx (Hallyx@aol.com), October 04, 1998.
-- Max Dixon (Max.Dixon@gte.net), October 04, 1998.
Well, now that we have all had a good cry and a big cyber-hug, its time to get over it.
I'll tell you how I handle it Steve, I remind myself that if we are right, THIS IS AS GOOD AS IT IS GOING TO BE FOR QUITE A WHILE. Then I mentally kick myself in the ass and think of all the people before me that had it really hard and I tell myself to shut up, quit whining and get on with what needs to be done before TSHTF.
These times demand grit and a toughness we basically haven't had to find in ourselves previously. Frankly, we just don't have time for too much introspection, that is a luxury of the age we are leaving.
Practice being tough now, we are gonna need it.
-- Will Huett (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 04, 1998.
I think Will is right. I remember when I was in college and struggling under my courseload I had one rule: You can't give up until the class is over. To put it another way, you can't give up until there is no other road. Just going to have to bite that bullet and march on. You have been through hard times before, you probably just forget.
-- Amy Leone (email@example.com), October 04, 1998.
I can't say that I have felt that I can't go on but I have been depressed over the whole Y2K issue because it was an avoidable event. The way I deal with depression is to release the anger that is causing my depression. First (being the anal-retentive person that I am) I analyze what fear is motivating my anger. Mostly, I talk about it to my husband. On night, I cried for a good half hour. I told my him that I like my technology (whine, whine, whine) and did not want to give it up. You see, I have an extensive technical background in trouble shooting data hardware, software and telecommunications networks so I understand the total ramifications before us. I like my electricity! I love my microwave and electric oven. No electricity means cooking over an open fire for hours, sweating like a stuck pig just so I can have a bowl of beans! Now this picture conjures up real fear for me. Therefore I get angry, hold in the anger and get depressed! When I talk to people about Y2K, I tell them that I am not the hunter-gather type. The only thing that I want to hunt is specials at the grocery store. It may be the truth, but it always makes them laugh. I know that Y2K issue is the one event that has the potential to throw us back into the dark ages but I will still keep my sense of humor about it. I guess I get that from my dad who is now 75 years old. When I had my talk with him about the subject of Y2K, he started explaining the details to me! I told him as gently as possible that he may not have electricity. His response was, "So. We didn't have electricity until I was seventeen years old". My philosophy is that the past is dead and the future has not happened, the only moment that really exists is this one. Live in it!
-- Anna Ginn (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 07, 1998.
Excuse me,...getting over it? There is no getting over it. There is only getting on with it. If you have never experienced the death of a loved one you may not understand that there is no geting over...there is only getting on...As I have posted on other threads...there is no normal to go back to when the world goes phooey...with death or major natural disaster...there is a "new" normal.
Our, task as I see it in these Y2K times, is to "get" the new normals...prepare and find comfort where we may. The "buck up" and "bootstraps" mentality is a lot of ca-ca. People need to grieve losses..it takes time...sometimes you force yourself to move when the grieving is not quite over...so some of the ouches linger. Y2K is like that cos the sands are forever shifting and unclear. It is not helpful to tell someone in grief to "get over it". In fact it is counter-productive and intuitive,..and so much what the world we want to change is all about.
Nurture yourself, take higher energy moments to prepare...Don't listen to bad advice.
-- Donna Barthuley (email@example.com), October 07, 1998.
steve, ignore r.d.s reccomendation to avoid tranquilisers, get yer butt down to the doc's office and ask for... no, DEMAND valium, and lots of it! thats what I did, and I couldnt be happier.
-- ed (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 09, 1998.
Donna, puhleese, this isn't death. We aren't grieving for someone we have lost. NOT YET. I know all too well what that is like and this AIN'T IT!
You are right about one thing, there will be a new normal, but for now we all need to leave the "nurturing ourselves" till after we are READY. I'm sorry, but there just isn't time for comforting our inner child right now.
The real children need us to GET ON WITH IT.
Prepare now, fall apart later.
-- will huett (email@example.com), October 10, 1998.
This question is more relevant now than ever before. It's like a movie and everything always turns out alright in the end. But this time we may be in for a surprise ending. I don't doubt we will get through this, we may all have to see what we're made of. It would be interesting to see one year from now what all our comments will be if we still have that ability.
-- Itol D. Youso (firstname.lastname@example.org), October 17, 1999.
Steve, i feel your pain. I'm a 13 year old going through shit right now. And i have this girlfriend who I feel is just about all that i have left. To answer your question: Ever feel like you can't go on?
I'm not sure if i can go on much longer...
You're right, no one seems to "Get It"
Nothing much else that i have to say. Heyy, i just noticed that im the first person to post something since 1999. lol...almost 5 years...haha...well, i've got to go...good luck, man (If you haven't already killed yourself) Peace Out
-- Ryan (ImNotGivingYouMyEmailAddress@NoWay.Com), November 07, 2004.