Help!! Family event and we need the author and title of the following stanza....

>Good Evening, Ladies and Gentlemen, hobos and tramps, cross eyed mosquitoes, and bow-legged ants, I am here to address you and not to undress you, I am here to tell you something I know absolutely nothing about.

Thank you, vfb777@aol.com

-- valerie (vfb777@aol.com), August 13, 1998