Allien from outer space (Jokes)

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There was this big spaceship that touched down just a little ways from a local tavern. This little robot comes strolling down a ramp looking for intelligent life on earth. The robot made its way into the tavern and saw several intelligent looking life species sitting at the bar. The robot went over to the first species and said to him, "I-AM-A-ROBOT-FROM-OUTERSPACE, WHAT-IS-YOUR-I.Q.?" The man answered, "I have a very high I.Q. it is 158". The robot answered, "GREAT! LETS-TALK-NUCLEAR PHYSICS". So they talked for a long time until the robot was satisfied with the newly found life species.

The robot then strolled down the bar a little ways to look for another species. He strolled up to a second man and said, "I-AM-A-ROBOT-FROM-OUTERSPACE, WHAT-IS-YOUR-I.Q.?" The man answered, My I.Q. is 125. The robot said, "GREAT! LETS-TALK-COMPUTER-SCIENCE". So the man and the robot talked until the robot was satisfied.

The robot then went down to the end of the bar and said to a third man, "I-AM-A-ROBOT-FROM-OUTERSPACE, WHAT-IS-YOUR-I.Q.?" The third man said, "Oh I don't know, it might be purdy high, I think it is about 98 or maybe a hunerd".

The robot thought to itself, "What subject would I talk to this guy about!! The robot paused for a little while and then energetically spoke up!

"Hey, have you received the latest issue of COUNTRYSIDE yet!!

-- r.h. in okla. (rhays@sstelco.com), January 24, 2002

Answers

Response to Allien from outer space

Ha Ha.

Huh?

-- Chuck (woah@mission4me.com), January 24, 2002.


Response to Allien from outer space

Yea right. Well I've been in the computer industry and known nuclear physists. I'll take Country Side thank you very much! Been there, done that and learned my lesson! I call it brewed, screwed and renewed. Now it's time to go screaming into the wilderness. YES. Here I come Earth!

-- Susan in Northern Michigan (cobwoman@yahoo.com), January 24, 2002.

Response to Allien from outer space

By the way, am I the only one out here who has seen a real UFO?

-- Susan in Northern Michigan (cobwoman@yahoo.com), January 24, 2002.

Response to Allien from outer space

I thought the robot exclaimed "Hey, how 'bout those Hawgs?" Only an Okie with a Razorback wife can get away with that tho'.

R.W. in Okla.

-- DocMac (mccartney-ct@chouteautel.com), January 24, 2002.


Response to Allien from outer space

Okay Doc, What's a razorback wife?

-- Susan in Northern Michigan (cobwoman@yahoo.com), January 25, 2002.


Response to Allien from outer space

She is an Arkansaw ((Arkansas)) Razorbacks football fan.

-- Thumper (slrldr@yahoo.com), January 25, 2002.

Susan, DO start a thread about your UFO sighting. I am intrigued!

-- Shannon at Grateful Acres Animal Sanctuary (gratacres@aol.com), January 25, 2002.

Shannon, RE: UFO siteing. You all probably think I'm screwy enough. Wish I hadn't mentioned it.

-- Susan in Northern Michigan (cobwoman@yahoo.com), January 25, 2002.

I had a UFO sighting. For about 20 years. Then things got repeated - close enough to be similar, just different enough light and angle in sky, - and then the classic "saucer-shaped" UFO got identified.

Go on - ask! Or don't. I'll tell in a while, but I'm pushed for time right now.

-- Don Armstrong (darmst@yahoo.com.au), January 25, 2002.


My husband and I saw a ufo! acualy now I think it might have been a new plane as it was triangle shaped and made no noise.

-- kathy h (ckhart55@earthlink.net), January 25, 2002.


Okay Don, tell all please. I just know you're gonna make fun of those of us who believe we've really seen a you know what.

-- Susan in Northern Michigan (cobwoman@yahoo.com), January 26, 2002.

No - no fun - It was a flying object, and it was truly unidentified. Classical shape - like a shallow soup-dish with an upside-down cup in it. Almost directly overhead, or a little to the west. Clear sky. Started as a steel-blue or blue-grey colour, shaded over to that sort of luminous pinky-orange-salmon colour you see on clouds ar sunset (but way overhead, and alone), then seemed to recede RAPIDLY upwards and colour faded again to grey, then eventually disappeared. I was about fourteen or so, but got all my available family out to watch as well. That's it! UFO - flying object, unidentified.

Nothing more for about twenty years.

Visiting the family farm again, late summer, about 5:30pm, saw the same thing again - low on the western horizon. Dark grey this time, saucer-flaps out to the side, bulbous top, just like before. Then the jet plane reached a geographic landmark, and turned south, and I realised what it was. The first instance had been much rarer, but what happened was that the plane was skimming along at the interface of a thermocline (interface between layers of air at different temperatures). The vapour from the jets had been spreading out behind the plane, along the surface of the thermocline (that's the "wings" of the saucer), then rolling back, meeting from both sides, and roiling up (maybe hundreds of feet behind the "wings" - that's the "upside-down-cup" "cabin" of the UFO. Much easier the second time I saw it - I would never have thought about it if it hadn't been for the first time. NOW I recall that the first time was succeeded by a spectacular thunderstorm and hailstorm - weather moving in fast from the west. So the thermoclines were drastically tilted that first time; and things happened much higher than they would normally.

That's it. Nothing exciting. An "Unidentified Flying Object" that got identified.

-- Don Armstrong (from Australia) (darmst@yahoo.com.au), January 26, 2002.


Aussie Man Don, huh? I sure cain't 'splain the way you can, but I know it wasn't swamp gas or jet trails or clouds or weather ballons or weather anything. Wish I could see it again...'ceptin' it was a little scary...I kept waiting for the mushroom cloud to happen after it went below the horizon. Glad THAT didn't materialize!

-- Susan in Northern Michigan (cobwoman@yahoo.com), January 26, 2002.

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