Out of the mouths of babes...

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A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.

It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you:

Better to be safe than......................punch a 5th grader

Never underestimate the power of.....................termites

You can lead a horse to water but..........................how?

Don't bite the hand that....................looks dirty

No news is...............................................impossible

A miss is as good as a.....................................Mister

You can't teach an old dog new.............................math

If you lie down with dogs, you'll............stink in the morning

Love all, trust..................................................me

The pen is mightier than the.................................pigs

An idle mind is.............................the best way to relax

Where there's smoke there's...........................pollution

Happy the bride who.......................gets all the presents

A penny saved is.........................................not much

Two's company, three's.........................the Musketeers

Don't put off till tomorrow what.......you put on to go to bed

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and............ you have to blow  your nose

None are so blind as..............................Stevie Wonder

Children should be seen and not...........spanked or grounded

If at first you don't succeed................get new batteries

You get out of something what you....see pictured on the box

When the blind leadeth the blind...........get out of the way

And, my personal favorite,

Better late than........................................pregnant!

-- Gary in Indiana (gk6854@aol.com), December 06, 2001

Answers

I am wiping my eyes as I type this. That was hysterically funny. I just love first graders! I taught first grade and loved every minute of it. They are certainly a LOT smarter than anyone gives them credit for! Funny too! :~)! That is a classic!

-- Nan (davidl41@ipa.net), December 06, 2001.

When my son was in first grade, he got off the bus one day and came in the house. 'What are ASSETS, daddy?' he asked. Not knowing where he had heard this and not sure if this was really what he heard, I said 'I'm not sure what you mean, put it in a sentence for me, where did you hear it?' He said 'well, on the way home on the bus two high school kids were making a lot of noise and Debbie (the bus driver) kept telling them to be quiet. Then she stopped the bus and opened the door. Then she said to them 'if you guys don't stop fooling around you can get your ASSETS off my bus right now.'

What else can I say?

Russ

-- (rwhitworth@sprint.ca), December 06, 2001.


What with the current events in our world these days, our kids--and we ourselves-- have been thrust into caring about and learning more about places in the world we never really thought of prior to September 11th. the other day, our two older kids, ages 7 and 10, were asking me questions about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.At one question from our 7 year old son, I did a double-take, and said, "What was that again?" He repeated his question:"Who are the Palace Indians?" quite innocently. I *had* to laugh, and when I could speak again without laughing, I explained to him the correct pronunciation, and answered his question. He's pretty clear on the issue now; but I am going to always wonder, what on earth sort of image that boy must've had in his head of "Palace Indians"!

-- Laurie S.,Tehachapi,CA (imaginationranch@sierratel.com), December 07, 2001.

Very funny - reminds me of when my son was in first grade. All the kids had to draw a picture of their bedrooms. When the teacher commented that he had not drawn a chest of drawers and asked where he kept his clothes, he of course replied - "Mom keeps them in the dryer"

-- Linda Al-Sangar (alsangal@brentwood-tn.org), December 09, 2001.

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