1. First and foremost, never ever tee tee on the electric fence!(my boys told me that! Smart boys!) 2. Never stand and wave when the dead truck goes by!(you know the guy that hauls off dead critters from the pig farms etc.) 3. Never ever call here kitty kitty in the woods cuz sometimes it isn't a kitty! 4. Never ever let a dairyman tell you a bad joke and accidentally laugh. He will feel compelled to tell you one every time you see him. 5. Never hang out laundry when the ducks are heading back North. 6. Never try to uncock a gun while you are giggling! I flattened the tractor tire and blew up the garden hose! (hubby wants to paint a little tractor andhose on the side of my truck like a WW1 flying ace!)

All of these except for # 1 I have learned by experience! Do you have any to add..............?

-- Nan (davidl41@ipa.net), February 07, 2001

Answers

the rule, as I remmeber it,, never ever be the last in line,, while holding hands, while the first TEE TEES on the fence. Learned the hard way

-- Stan (sopal@net-port.com), February 07, 2001.

Never stand next to a dog when he tee tees on the electric fence. He is afraid of you forever (true story)

-- diane (gardiacaprines@yahoo.com), February 07, 2001.

Ok, so what happens if one DOES tee-tee on the fence? I mean, one does not actually TOUCH the fence while tee-teeing, does one??

-- Shannon at Grateful Acres Animal Sanctuary (gratacres@aol.com), February 07, 2001.

Delicately speaking, the Tee Tee acts as a conductor of the electric current. Electricity loves water. Ya' Know? YEEEEEOUCH!

-- Nan (davidl41@ipa.net), February 07, 2001.

Just thought of a couple more since Spring is coming......If you play cowpie baseball(my boys and I do every chance we get:~) That is where you play ball with a cowpie and an old fence post for a bat.....you need to remember a few easy rules......1. Never ever volunteer to play catcher. 2. Never ever give your children a cheesy grin when you are at bat or you get this really bad taste in your mouth!!! 3. If they throw you a hanging curve ball that is high and inside, let them call a ball on ya! Now.....PLAY BALL......HmmmmmI have always wondered why we can't ever get another team to play us?!heehee

-- Nan (davidl41@ipa.net), February 07, 2001.

Never trust your dog to watch your food. Don't invite your friends to visit in the spring unless they have four wheel drive. Remember that heads up means get out of the way, not look up so you can get hit with whatever is coming at you. Pay very close attention when using a ringer washer. Never turn your back on a goat. If you are picking berries alone and hear a noise. Don't stop to ask who it is, bear's don't answer.

I have so many, but i will spare you all. :)

-- Shau Marie (shau@centurytel.net), February 07, 2001.

Never, ever leave the gate open-even for a minute. Don't let the goat in the grain room unattended-ever. They have prehensile lips and know how to use them. If you leave something expensive on the floor the puppy will destroy it (especially if you've borrowed it) even though he has several hundred dollars worth of chew toys strewn all over the house. Cats will never listen to reason, don't bother trying. If the dog is eating something you can't identify in the side yard make him sleep in the barn that night, if you don't the unidentified object will end up semidigested on the livingroom rug. The absolute most important thing I've learned in my 38 years of life...Always turn the light on before walking into a room where 4 dogs have been alone all night--been there and have stepped in some extremely gross stuff.

Stacy Rohan in Windsor, NY

-- Stacy Rohan (KincoraFarm@aol.com), February 07, 2001.

Never play barefoot in the yard where you keep the dog!

-- Soni (thomkilroy@hotmail.com), February 07, 2001.

Just thought of a naughty one.....I was reading back over these and read watch out for the ringer washer and never turn your back on the goat. I might add that you should never turn your back on the washer either or you might get a little behind in your work! SNICKER! Oh, I'm sorry, I will try to behave.......NOT!

-- Nan (davidl41@ipa.net), February 09, 2001.

Never - EVER - take a sleeping aid & a laxative on the same night.

-- Sparrowhawk (sparrowkiak@yahoo.com), February 14, 2001.