Do you all have a pet peeve? I do. In fact, I have two of them. One is men who call their wives, the wife, or the little woman, yhe old lady or woman, or the Mrs. instead of MY wife, or MY woman, The same goes for women who refer to their husbands as their old man.

The other pet peeve is city folk that bring their city ways to the country. (And complain about the noise and smells.)

My used to be pet peeves were, people not using turn signals and the welfare system, now they're just peeves.

This is your chance to sound off. What really bothers you? It doesn't have to be something that will change the world, but something you'd like to see change.

-- Cindy (atilrthehony_1@yahoo.com), October 16, 2000

Answers

Couples who dress alike and call each other Ma and Pa or Mom and Dad even though they have no children .SHES NOT YOUR MOM !It would drive me nuts

-- Patty Gamble (fodfarms@slic.com), October 16, 2000.

Chewing tobacco. What a disgusting habit!!! Even the fact the 'don't stink' doesn't help.

-- Ken S. in WC TN (scharabo@aol.com), October 16, 2000.

Off the top of my head, city folks who move to the country and want it just like the city! If you can't live without a huge grocery store or a WalMart next door, why did you move???

Also, city folks who move here so they can let their city dogs run loose. grrrrrr. dh in nm.

-- debra in nm (dhaden@nmtr.unm.edu), October 16, 2000.

racist jokes and loud, obnoxious car commercials on the tube.

-- melina b. (goatgalmjb1@hotmail.com), October 16, 2000.

Thank God for mute buttons. Too bad we can't mute some of the radios these teens play as they drive by. And I don't care what kind of music it is.

-- Cindy (atilrthehony_1@yahoo.com), October 16, 2000.

Hmmm. I guess it's people with negative attitudes who feel compelled to tell everyone about how awful it is all the time. We all legitimately have gripes and need to share them from time to time, but some people make a real lifestyle out of it. As if we need more input to bring us down these days. Sheesh!!!

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), October 16, 2000.

Aw, sheepish....maybe if we air a few, there will be fewer to air. One can hope, huh? One of my pet peeves are old, outdated yard sale signs. If you have one, take them down afterwards!

-- Leann Banta (thelionandlamb@hotmail.com), October 16, 2000.

Bureaucrats, thieves, liars, and the desire to REMAIN ignorant....that's about it.

-- Doreen (animalwaitres@yahoo.com), October 16, 2000.

Closed minds and bigots.

JOJ

-- jumpoffjoe (jumpoff@echoweb.net), October 16, 2000.

Even if you live in a small town, believeing / the city officals can make their rules for running the city each day as they go along--- rules & laws that apply else where have nothing to do with them!! (the good-old boy system/ or I guess as was said in a previous post/ chooseing to remain IGNORANT! Liveing in such a small world that one one matters but yourself/ & haveing no clue about a world out side of your own sight!!!!!!!!! Sonda in Ks.

-- Sonda (sgbruce@birch.net), October 16, 2000.

People who buy candy, soda, ice cream and other pricy stuff and pay with food stamps. I once rang up an order of over $40 worth of junk and the woman used food stamps. Give me a break.

-- Cathy Horn (hrnofplnty@webtv.net), October 16, 2000.

MY woman or MY man. You guys really OWN each other?

Assumptions that you are christian, or jewish, or belong to an organized religion. The 'bible quotes' that show up in papers and meetings and newsletters.

Intolerance of difference.

Stupidity. The inability to reason.

-- Anne (HT@HM.com), October 16, 2000.

Okay, okay....I thought of a real one, but it's kind of local. It's when folks call Puget Sound: "THE Puget Sound". It drives me absolutely insane!!! I think it's because there's maybe 3 of us left in Western Washington who actually were born around here and pronounce it correctly, and the folks (broadcasters, radio and teevee, usually....grrrrr) who say this, are from some location which is wholly other...

See, I can be mean and petty without trying very hard! (Actually, I have to work pretty hard at not being negative. To me, that just demonstrates that what one doesn't like in others is usually something that one doesn't like about oneself...if one could just be a little more honest and soul-searching.) Enough babbling....

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), October 16, 2000.

Ditto on the food stamp one. I know some people really do need it & that's fine. I was behind someone a few weeks ago that had 2 carts of groceries paid with food stamps, but had cash for their cigarettes & beer. I am pregnant with #5 & it's hard at times, but I pay cash for all of our grocery items & we are a 1 income family. Doesn't anyone have any pride??

-- Wendy (weiskids@yahoo.com), October 16, 2000.

Obnoxious drivers who tailgate or just generally drive like idiots.

Parents who want to be kids. You know; the ones who are too busy out fishing or hunting with their buddies, or shopping with the girls, or sitting in the bars all weekend long. (Grow up! Why don'tcha.)

Actually, that's okay, folks - your kids are safe at my house. I feed 'em and listen to 'em and cheer at their ball games (haven't seen YOU there) and love 'em and worry if they aren't in by curfew. And I am grateful every day for the ability to be there - and mad as all get out because the need is there.

-- Polly (tigger@moultrie.com), October 16, 2000.

Funny I was just tellin my old lady how hot I get when I can't buy my cigs and suds with my food stamps!! Ha.....Kirk

-- Kirk Davis (kirkay@yahoo.com), October 17, 2000.

Churches that take in tons of money and won't use a penny of it to feed or clothe local people who need help. I have talked till I am blue in the face but they don't care, too busy thinking up ways to spend the money on the church. I would rather go to church in a run down building and help people than a fancy one and do nothing. Isn't that the golden rule? Do you know that here in Kentucky you can't get food stamps if your car is too new? Like an 83. What's up with that. I have never tried, but I know people who need help, from lay offs, or job injuries, they are not lazy, just a run of bad luck. And they treat them like dirt. They don't want help forever, just till they get back on their feet. They would have to sell the 83 little truck (which gets good gas miliage) and buy an old clunker (which gets bad gas miliage) just to get a little help. Now who went to school and though that one up? I try to help by contacting my friends and forgetting the rest. Hard working Americans get nothing unless you both quit your jobs and sell both your cars, then they will help.

-- Cindy in Ky (solidrockranch@msn.com), October 17, 2000.

My pet peeve is people who blame others or things for bad things that happen with their kids. i seen on the tube last night that a baby drown while being left in the tub in one of those safety rings. The mother basically blamed the ring and is going to sue the company. She left her baby alone in the tub bottom line. I don't care who is calling, banging on the door etc. i'm not going to leave my baby in the tub alone. My husband an I usually give her a bath with both of us in the room otherwise I put her in the kitchen sink. I guess my real pet peeve is people who blame everything on everyone else. If i die of being fat I should prpobably tell my family to sue the company who make M&M's

-- cynthia hemenway (cynthiahemenway@hotmail.com), October 17, 2000.

Cynthia, I agree with you, & my addition to that is --my friends daughter was driving to work & stopped at a stop sign & a drunk driver ran into her car & it burst into flames & their daughter was trapped & burned to death! And the drunk driver was a localman with lots of good-old-boy backing--looks like he will come out smelling like a rose!!!! (my ranting is DRUNK DRIVERS--SOME WHO GET BY WITH IT OVER & OVER BECAUSE OF WHO THEY ARE NO MATTER WHAT THEY DO) Sonda in Ks.

-- Sonda (sgbruce@birch.net), October 17, 2000.

When people seem unable to think or reason for themselves beyond what they have heard, read, or been taught. The kind where, because their pastor told them so, or because they saw it on TV, or even because "everyone knows that..."it must be true.Then if yoou disagree with them, they won't listen, they just shout you down, never giving you a chance to offer another point of view. Sometimes I think that people like that are threatened by the idea that whatever they believe could possibly be wrong. My other peeve is DOGS. Dogs that run loose and chase livestock. Dogs that attack you walking long the road, minding your own business. Hordes of dogs belonging to people who are too poor to provide for their own children! Dogs that eat off the family dishes and are their owner's 'children'. There is a whole world full of hungry, hurting people who need love and attention, and food, and it really irks me to see it wasted on dogs. If you talk about killing one, for getting into livestock or threatening to bite someone, people act like it's murder or something,because 'dogs are people too'. But unborn babies are not, and should be routinely disposed of if there are not enough resources to feed them!?

-- Rebekah (daniel1@itss.net), October 17, 2000.

yep, yep, and yep. I agree- tailgaters, parents on drugs, loose dogs,everything but the food stamp stuff. who has the right to decide what exactly other people should buy with their food stamps? And should they buy only the correct things so that other people in the store will not look down on them quite so much? And if the buy "good" things like meat, would the vegatarian checker approve????? My pet peeve this week is the city people who move to a dirt road in the country and put up those signs that say "slow, dusty,children".I always think to myself gee lady, I'm sorry your children are slow and dusty, but why put a sign on the road announcing it?

-- maureenb (firegirl102@hotmail.com), October 17, 2000.

City people who drive on a dirt road like it's a freeway, gossip, bigotry in any form, political rhetoric spouted by someone who doesn't really know the issues or their consequences.

-- Peg (NW WI) (wildwoodfarms@hushmail.com), October 17, 2000.

One of my pet peeves ~~women who are over 50 and try to act like they are 16! They wear the cute outfits from the the Jr. departments and think they look so young!Do they not have mirrors? I have a sister who is 5'5" and weighs only 96lbs--so she won't look old! She forgets that she smokes one cig. after the other and has those "smokers" lips, her breakfast and lunch is coffee & cigs.and she dyes her hair every two weeks(so black it looks blue!).Has fingernails that are 3" long painted bright red! and can't clean, wash or work in the yard because it messes her hands up!And never feels good!!! Give us a break!

-- Debbie T in N.C. (rdtyner@mindspring.com), October 17, 2000.

I'm sorry the money from food stamps comes out of my pocket and you better believe I get ticked off when they buy better cuts of meat than I can afford .When hubby was out of work I could get no help unless I put a lien on my house .But if I had nothing they would give me the sun .

-- Patty Gamble (fodfarms@slic.com), October 17, 2000.

About the foodstamps...that was my point, too, Patty. I know lots of people out there really need a little help, and I don't mind helping. I wish I wasn't resentful about the items some folks purchase, but I am. I can't afford to spend $$ on organic olive oil at $12 for a small bottle, or $7.59 for a fancy box of cereal, or $3.69 on a deli sandwich, but I see people do it every day where I work, and they're paying with foodstamps. I do resent it.

-- Cathy Horn (hrnofplnty@webtv.net), October 18, 2000.

I agree with all the peeves about city folk ! I also have one personal peeve--crooked pictures. I catch myself in offices, libraries, and relatives homes, straightening their pictures. I have been known to ask for a hammer and nails to rehang some--stupid, huh ?

However, I have to ask sheepish: What is positive these days ? I took an inventory yesterday of life in general and couldn't find many good things. I found a lot of acceptable things, a mountain of unacceptable, a lot of intolerable but only a handful of magnificent. I could use a few more suggestions !

-- Joel Rosen (Joel681@webtv.net), October 18, 2000.

Telemarketers. Especially electronic ones.

Barbara Bush called up twice last night. Very annoying.

-- Anne (HT@HM.com), October 18, 2000.

LITTER!!! I want the culprits hung, in public. Sorry, but it's a BIG pet peeve.

-- sharon wt (wildflower@ekyol.com), October 18, 2000.

Joel , how about your alive , you have a beatiful wife and children who love you ,for the most part you are living the lifestyle you want , come on you can think of more.

-- Patty Gamble (fodfarms@slic.com), October 18, 2000.

My pet peeves are panty lines--especially on women in "professional" positions, shoulder pads that are folded under (you can always tell cause the shoulders are lopsided), and clothing tags or lingings that are hanging out (why doesn't someone tell them???). Sheepish, I agree about Puget Sound, but what really gets me is people saying Warshington. Can't they read?

-- Amber (mikeandamberq@hotmail.com), October 18, 2000.

Hi Joel, what about Grace...God's Grace, that is. It is stunning in it's simplicity, breathtaking in it's scope and magnificent in it's purpose. May the grace of God bless you and keep you! God Bless! Wendy

-- Wendy@GraceAcres (wjl7@hotmail.com), October 18, 2000.

Joel, aw c'mon! Listen, don't get all weird about this, but I consider just getting to "know" YOU a positive thing that's happened in my life! AND this forum and all the great folk here. Hey, I have been going through a lot of personal angst and trauma (not going to mention any of it here, not worth it) and yet there's still some upside to things. Ducklings, mayhaps. Learning that there's such a thing as an artificial chicken! Thinking about what community means. Better stuff coming....

Hope things get better for you. You have cheered me up many times, so I hope this can be some kind of payback....

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), October 18, 2000.

1. Developers who buy up farm land, sell one acrelots to poeple who build big fancy houses on them and spray their lawns with herbicides and pesticides that end up in my well water. 2. People who call for tolerance for thier destructive ideologies but cry out for censurship of others. 3.Everything about the city but particularily the mad consumerism and drive for continual entertainment 4.Teenagers who think the world exists to show them a good time. 5. People who have children for social status then push them aside for their own selfish pursuits. 6. Annoying telemarketers - If I wanted your product I would have called YOU! 7.Knick-knacks

-- Tiffani Cappello (cappello@alltel.net), October 18, 2000.

The majority of people in this world who refuse to realize what is happening around them. The fact that while it is good to look on the bright side it is also important to face reality. Don't they see the godless society we live in with the more money more things attitude that is killing us little by little each day??!!

-- evelyn Bergdoll (evandjim@klink.net), October 18, 2000.

Please don't blame the godless folk for everyone's problems.

-- Anne (HT@HM.com), October 18, 2000.

Have been trying not to but feel I must post I have not been able to work since the middle of march and yes I am getting that huge amount of government help. I get about $120 a month in food stamps and $80 a month as a grant for living expenses. I use credit cards and what little left in savings to get by. Anyone know someone looking for a x-ray tech to hire that has to walk with a cane? And yes I do buy some candy like the m&m's and like as i bake cookies and use them to help dress them up. And yes sometimes I do buy steak but it is to make a good meal for those who help me do the things I no longer can do and I want to give something in return. I am sorry I have a herniated disc in my back which showed up on a MRI in march and again in early october. Do you think I enjoy haveing to take help because I can't do it alone? To those of you who want to simplify your life try living on $3000 a year because that is what I will have as a total with what I made before I was placed on medical leave (unpaid of course and not at my request but because the dr. I worked for was tired of patients telling him I feel silly I know I don't need to be here as bad as your x-ray tech does) and the $80 a month grant. You would really marvel at my shopping cart as I look for marked down produce veg and or fruit so I can give my animals treats. Cornmeal to use with the pig food as people that I worked with are so slow in paying me what they owe me that some months I have to stretch what I have to buy animal food. And yes I bought a six pack of beer to celbrate my birthday at home. First I had bought since march don't drink much but once in awhile I do like one. And yes I buy my cigarettes 2 packs amonth and a bag of the cheapest pipe tobacco I can find. And yes I get help with my medical bills but have to pay the gass for my car for a 60 mile round trip when I go to the VA and hope that it or me doesn't break down durring the trip. And I said help with my medical visits but those copays are hard to come up with on what I have available. Do I think I ought to get more? Not really but please don't begrudge me what help I am getting. How about Social Security disability you may ask as if you look part of what you make and is taken out for ss is for disability no chance until you have been denied and then get a lawyer so he can get his share. After all do you really think the ss judges work in government service to do justice or just learn the system to make sure that they can get their share when they go into private practice? Rule number one around here is make the land payment granted it is only $27.50 a month then buy animal food then try to pay the utilities and maybe a quick tour of the thrift stores and yard sales to buy that neat pan I have been needing if I can find it for a quarter. Go to town once a week round trip of 8 miles but I don't want to waste gas. Maybe moms do buy kids more candy because that is all they can get for the kids. It is one thing to make the choice most of us have made to but clothes at yard sales etc. and another being forced to. Should I call to find out how to hook the hose to the exhaust on my car so I will no longer be a burden to anyone or what. Sorry to rant but sometimes you end up where you have to ask for help and I am very thankful for what I am getting but if anyone wants to try my shoes on for a mile let me know and I will send them to you. gail

-- gail missouri ozarks (gef123@hotmail.com), October 19, 2000.

I want to offer an apology for my response above. Sorry!!!!!!! gail

-- gail missouri ozarks (gef123@hotmail.com), October 19, 2000.

Gail, I am sorry for your situation.You were not the cases that get us mad .Should the gov.and county give you help ? You bet!You are not out sitting on your butt because you are lazy your injured .The people that bother me "worked in a grocery store" are the able body 20 somethings that don't want to work and believe everyone owes it to them .They buy all name brands only the best meats and so forth .I don't want my tax dollars being spent on them .I buy on sale,generic,and clearance racks.Our clothes come from tagsales .I hope things get better for you .

-- Patty Gamble (fodfarms@slic.com), October 19, 2000.

gail....your response gave me more of a response than many I have had from reading posts to the Forum. .

Your very important point is:

"It is one thing to make the choice most of us have made to but(buy) clothes at yard sales etc. and another being forced to."

I can't add anything to that, but I would appreciate it if other readers here would just think about that for a minute, or hopefully for a day or two.

It is still true that most women in the United States are "one man away from welfare". (I know that gail is a guy, btw.)Think about what would happen to your economic status, women readers, if your husband were to disappear, have an bad accident or die. How would you hold everything together? Any chance you might have to get some public assistance? Unless you are in a very strongly organized community of Mormons, Amish, or your tech stock portfolio didn't just take a big dump in the last couple of days, I'd bet you will.

Welfare abuse happens in about 5% of the cases in our country. Let's say that's a political statement, and figure it's really double that...make it 10%. The money involved is so insignificant compared to abuses like government wasting money on Star Wars-type projects that it doesn't hardly justify discussion.

Now that I think about it, if I had nothing but hard times and despair facing me every day, I just bet I would be buying a few "treats" at the store! And I would be happy to turn around to anyone in line and tell them to ****-off if they said one peep to me!

That's my little rant for the morning. Thanks for indulging me. gail, hope things look WAY up for you, buddy!

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), October 19, 2000.

One thing I didn't report on in my rant yesterday is why I think I was so down. I was supposed to be in Kansas City at the VA hospital seeing an orthopedic surgeon who specializes in the handleing of back problems with neurological symtoms. I was called tuesday that the appointment had to be rescheduled as they had found my doctor dead at his home when he did not show up to see his patients. I know I should not have penned so much of my hope on what a man would do to help me but should continue to trust my God. Thank you all for being here and for all the heartwarming comments I have received from you all. If this country could just be filled with those of you on this forum I have grown to love as family instead of what we have why then Joel could just stay at home and love his family and worry about the weather. gail

-- gail missouri ozarks (gef123@hotmail.com), October 19, 2000.

Sheepish i should move by you , the big city i grew up near had tons of welfare fraud .Woman having child after child to fatten there check .They would pay with food stamps and drive away in there nice car with all there gold jewlery drapping off them .Did i mention all these children had differant fathers .

I don't mind a helping hand , i mind a lifelong hand out .By all means someone who is disabled should get all the help they can .There are lots of honest hard working people on assistance but the scum leave a bad taste in your mouth .I probally could go to the store and buy more new clothes , but I could not afford the brand names I get in like new condition at yard sales.We have to pinch pennies to make ends meet , so the children have a better life in the country .Do you remember what clothes you had as a child or the sundays spent together ?

-- Patty Gamble (fodfarms@slic.com), October 19, 2000.

Patty, I wish you lived next door! That would be so wonderful! But I wonder if I would ever get anything done? I would probably want to just talk and talk and talk and...well you get the picture!!!

I really have to *remind* myself to not get all bent out of shape at the store when I am behind somebody who is buying stuff I can't afford with what appears to be subsidies from the government. It really used to get on my nerves. BUT. I have experienced several friends going through public assistance and have now seen the other side. AND. I also know that some folks are so disenchanted with the government (hmm...even like some folks that post to this forum) that they will take whatever they can get. They feel it's owed to them, since the government seems to "abuse" them....why not "abuse" the system back? Well, I don't agree, but...

Anyway, this was Cindy's thread about pet peeves, and here I am stepping all over it with stuff about welfare. Sorry!!!

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), October 19, 2000.

I didn't mean to start an argument, I'm sorry. It just seems sometimes the rules are all backward and don't make sence. My good friend is disabled, back injury at work, has been for a while. He worked many years before he was hurt. His wife of course has to work till retirement age I'm sure, I think he gets 500 a month. But the kicker is if he does something like computer work or fixin lawnmowers or something he CAN do, and reports the income, they take what he is getting away, even if it ain't much he made on the side. Here in Kentucky, if a man makes say 400 a week before taxes, thats good to get by on, if the company has insurance. It seems to me he should be able to make 1000 dollars a month on his own before they took any away. They have a boy in high school still. And it is scary, not many people hire you if you are hurt, thinkin' you'll hurt it some more and then they will pay. And a man cannot support a family on minimum wage anymore.

We have some more dear friends in WV, and he got hurt bad in the coal mines, ruined his leg for life. They are in the same boat. They pay the medical bills, but who buys the food. They have one truck and he needs it to go to the city to the hospital all the time. They don't qualify for food stamps, his truck is too new. He wants to support his family, he can learn another trade, they should encourage him and help him till he's makin enough to live. They shouldn't take his 'help' away if he tries to make any money. That's all.

-- Cindy in Ky (solidrockranch@msn.com), October 20, 2000.

Your right Cindy .The gov. should help if not pay all medical bills and job retraining .One of my points is if you haven't worked hard all your life they will give you everything under the sun .If you have worked hard all your life to have what they call to new a vechile or own your home you get jack crap without a lein .Doesn't seem fair does it ? Have your friends check into food pantrys , St. Vincent de Paul , goodwill ,salvation army and so forth , maybe they can help some .

-- Patty Gamble (fodfarms@slic.com), October 20, 2000.

When a new employee heard another mention consulting with "The Little Woman", she bristled but held her tongue, which was wise, because when she finally met the man's wife, she saw the joke: "The Little Woman" is 6'6" -- 4" taller than her husband!

-- snoozy (allen@oz.net), October 20, 2000.

in reference to the situation about being "one man away from welfare" i beleive that in order to be self sufficient in this country you not only need to know how to grow or gather food, but you need to know some marketable skills. a woman who is dependent on a man for income is NOT self sufficient. sure he may be the main breadwinner for now, but she should have skills that would let her earn a living/provide for herself and the kids if he dies or runs off with a young bimbette from the city... :) but hey, back to the minor pet peeve thread. yeah i hate all the biggies too, but a peeve is an irksome little thing that annoys you way out of proportion to it's real importance....cards that fall out of magazines, out of date yardsale signs, self-righteous bumperstickers of any polotical persuasion. mothers who smoke around their kids, people who let ther dogs crap anywhere and don't clean it up, people who drive my gravel road like its I-5 but the number one thing that pisses me off is misspelled readerboards!!!! "All Youre Supplys for Dog's and Cat's"..

-- Juno redleaf (gofish@presys.com), October 22, 2000.

My pet peeve isn't those who need help, getting it. It is the cheat that the government (any level) doesn't want to do anything about. There are so many damn loopholes for those who don't need, which allow them to take away from those who do. There is a federal reservation near here which issues commodities (food) each month to all it's inhabitants. Income or tribal status has nothing at all to do with receiving them. If you live on tribal land, you get the items whether you are a tribal member or not, or whether you make $5k a month.

-- Harry (wrp@trib.com), October 22, 2000.